Choices
by vjd
Summary: My mother was my best friend, and I didn’t want to leave her, but I had to protect her from seeing me at the end. I wanted her to remember me how I was now, not a shell of the person I had once been. I was moving to Forks to start over for the last time.
1. Chapter 1

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I stared out the passenger side window of the car. My mother was taking me to the airport. I was leaving to live with my dad for a while. She didn't want me to go, but this was something I needed to do.

"Bella. You don't have to do this. Please, we'll work something out."

"Mom, I told you already. I want to go." It wasn't a complete lie. My mother was my best friend, and I didn't want to leave her, but I had to protect her from seeing me at the end. I wanted her to remember me how I was now, not a shell of the person I had once been.

It's strange how one word can change your life forever. Leukemia. I still remember the first day I went in for testing. I hadn't been feeling well. I was just so tired all the time. When I started getting terrible headaches, and pains in my joints my mother insisted I go to the doctors to make sure I was all right. I can still remember the smell of the doctor's office as we entered. It smelt of peppermint somehow. I looked for any signs of the candy, but couldn't find a candy jar anywhere. The doctor entered and smiled warmly at my mother and me. He started talking…that's when my life changed. I was 15 at the time. I remember being bored as he droned on about the results of my blood work, but I instantly perked up when I heard him mention the word Leukemia. I wasn't sure what it was. I recalled learning something about it in school, but I couldn't remember what. I glanced at my mother and saw that she had started to cry. The doctor continued to explain what Leukemia was. I had cancer of my blood cells. I don't remember much after that. I think I was in shock. I began to once again search for the candy jar as the doctor explained my options to my mother.

I faintly remember my mother trying to talk to me on the drive home, but I couldn't seem to focus on what she was saying. As soon as we got home I went to my room and curled up onto my bed. I stayed in my room all that night and the next day, unmoving. I felt as though I was in a dream. I was too young to get sick. My mother tried to talk to me several times, but I ignored her. When I finally did wake up it was not a pretty sight. I started screaming and crying. I tore my room apart. Anything my hands touched got destroyed. It took my mother several tries to restrain me. I fell into her arms and together we sobbed for what felt like hours. Finally, when there were no more tears, we talked. I started treatment that week. At first, it really seemed to be working, and things seemed to get better. My mother had remarried, and life seemed happy again.

I was 17 now. Not three months ago we found out I had stopped responding to treatment. The doctor did not know why, and without a bone marrow donor, there was nothing else they could do for me. I went through all the stages of grief--anger, depression; I was finally at peace with my fate. That is when I made the difficult decision to leave. I wanted to get to know my father before it was too late. It was selfish of me to burden him in this way, but he seemed all right with it. I wanted my mother to have good memories only of our time together. It was the one thing I could leave her with. I knew it hurt her to have me leave. Though we never talked about it, we both knew we would most likely not see each other again. I had about a year left to live, and I did not plan on going back.

I wanted to start over. Go to a place where no one knew me--a place where I wouldn't be known as that sick girl. I hated the pity I saw in everyone's eyes. I didn't want their pity. I just wanted to be treated normal again. I wanted life to be as it was before I got sick, and this seemed like the best way to achieve that. My mother would be able to travel with her new husband. She would be happy in time. This was best for everyone.

I did my best not to cry as I said my finally goodbye to my mother. I could tell she was trying to be strong for me, but when I turned to leave for my gate I could hear her crying. I refused to look back. I don't know if I would have had the strength to get on the plane if I looked back.

When I landed in Port Angeles it was raining. I had forgotten how much it rained where my father lived. I shouldn't have been surprised; he lived on the Olympic Peninsula after all. I saw him waiting for me right our side my gate. I smiled at him, not paying any attention to where I was going, and tripped right into his arms. He grinned.

"Hey Bells. You haven't changed a bit."

"Thanks dad." I muttered.

We didn't talk much as we got my luggage and headed back to his home. I didn't have much luggage with me and it all fit in the trunk of his cruiser. Charlie was the chief of police in Forks. I had tried to pack for cold weather. It was hard. Phoenix was not a cold place. Before I left, my mother had bought me some sweaters to help. I needed a few more items, but they could wait.

"How are you?" He asked conversationally. Questions like this always seemed loaded somehow. Do I say fine to make him happy, or tell the truth—that I am beyond exhausted?

"I'm ok." I answered, deciding not to go into details.

"I found a car for you…well truck."

"You didn't have to do that. I was going to look once I got in town."

"It's no big deal. I just wanted you to have a way to get around once you got here."

"You didn't but it already did you?" I asked. I had brought my own money to buy a car. It wasn't a lot, but enough for something dependable. I didn't really need anything that would last too long. It was enough of a burden just having me live with him; I didn't want to inconvenience him anymore than I already was.

"It wasn't that much. I got it from a friend. It's not the youngest thing in the world. It's dependable, and will get you where you need to go." He shrugged.

"Thanks dad, but you really didn't have to. I had money."

"I wanted to." He insisted.

"Thanks."

He grunted once in reply, uncomfortable with being thanked. We remained quiet the rest of the trip home. As we pulled into the driveway I got my first glimpse of the truck Charlie had bought for me. It was older than dirt, but it had character. It was a red Chevy, and looked indestructible. It was simply perfect.

"Thanks dad." I said again. "It's great." I reached over and gave him a quick hug.

"Well…I'm glad you like it." He mumbled as he got out of the cruiser and retrieved my bags from the trunk.

Charlie brought my bags up to my room and left me alone to unpack. I was thankful for the time alone. I was truly beyond tired and needed a nap. As I walked to my bed I took in the space that had once been mine as a very small child. Not much had changed. The same rocking chair stood by my window. The walls were light blue, and the same-yellowed lace curtains hung from the window. I shuffled along the wooden floor to my bed and collapsed.

I could un-pack later.

I could smell something cooking as I slowly started to wake. I looked around to find that it was now dark outside. I must have been asleep for a few hours. I still felt tired, but I knew I needed to get up and eat. School was tomorrow and I needed to keep up my strength.

"Hey."

"Hi." I answered as I joined Charlie in the kitchen. He had made eggs and bacon for dinner. I sat down at the small table rubbing the sleep from my eyes. I felt bad sitting back and allowing Charlie to serve me, but I was still very tired.

We ate in silence. Charlie, nor I, was much for talking. We were good companions in that way. We didn't mind being quiet. Charlie finished his dinner quickly and cleaned his plate. There was a game on that he wanted to catch. I finished alone in the kitchen; cleaning up once I was done.

I said a quiet good night to Charlie and made my way upstairs. I grabbed my toiletries from my room and entered the one small bathroom Charlie and I had to share. I wasn't too keen on sharing, but there wasn't much I could do about it. I let the hot water run over my body as it relaxed me.

I was nervous about tomorrow. I was starting right in the middle of the school year. I wanted the kids to accept me, but I didn't want to get too close. That wouldn't be fair. As I finished toweling off I made my way back to my room, and changed into my pajamas. I once again collapsed onto my bed; feeling exhausted once more. This was one of the many things I hated about being sick—I seemed to always be tired.


	2. Chapter 2

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I woke to my alarm screaming at me to wake up. Reluctantly, I reached out from under my covers to turn it off. I hadn't slept very well. It had stormed all night long, and the sound of the wind and rain on the windows made me restless.

I didn't want to be late for my first day of school so I quickly got up and dressed. Charlie was waiting for me when I came downstairs. Once again he had made eggs. I was beginning to see a pattern. I would have to go shopping for real food after school.

"Morning dad."

He frowned. "Are you feeling ok Bells?" I could see the concern in his eyes.

"I'm fine. I just didn't sleep very well with the storm last night. There's no need to worry." I assured him. I knew I had circles under my eyes, but I didn't think I looked that bad.

"If you need me I'll be at the station. You have the number right?"

"Yes, and I won't need you." I insisted.

"Well if you do…" He trailed off as he shrugged into his jacket.

"I know how to reach you. Have a good day."

"You too Bells." He called as he left the house.

I wasn't very hungry, and the eggs Charlie had prepared looked anything but appetizing. I decided to skip breakfast and went upstairs to get my bag.

I wanted to get to school a little early to get my schedule before everyone started to show up. The last thing I wanted was to draw attention to myself. Being the new, clumsy kid was bad enough.

I quickly grabbed my jacket and ran out the door. As soon as I sat in my truck I noticed it smelt vaguely of pipe smoke, though I knew it had been cleaned. It was a pleasant smell. It reminded me of my grandfather, and how he used to smoke his pipe each night before he went to bed.

I smiled at the memory as I put the key in the ignition and started the truck. I jumped as it roared to life. It was a lot louder than I thought it would be. I giggled to myself as I put the truck into drive, 'at least it was dependable', I thought.

The school was not hard to find. It wasn't like the one I had gone to in Phoenix. That school was one very large building that housed over 1,ooo students. Forks High was a bunch of trailers with about 250 students.

I found a parking place near what I assumed was the main building. It was still raining and I made my way swiftly to the front door. Inside I found a rather large lady behind a desk. She had red hair and looked up at me with a smile.

"Can I help you?"

"Yes." I said as I approached. "I'm Isabella Swan."

"Ah yes. We've been expecting you." She replied seizing me up. I could only imagine what she was thinking.

"Here is your schedule, and a map." She instructed. "Get every one of your teachers to sign this form and return it to me at the end of the day."

"Thanks." I replied as I took the papers from her.

I left quickly wanting time to study the map alone before school started. I went back to the warmth of my truck and drove out back where the student parking was located. Luckily, there weren't many kids there. I found a good spot and studied the map until the first bell rang.

My first four classes were standard enough. I was disappointed to find the reading list for my English class was the same one I had the year before in Phoenix. At least I would be able to recycle my old essays.

There was a small girl with curly brown hair, who seemed to befriend me right away. She was in two of my classes. I couldn't remember her name, but she insisted I go to lunch with her. I thankfully tagged along, but I still did not feel very hungry.

I felt many eyes on me as I entered the lunchroom. I tried to ignore them as I bought an apple and a coke.

"Aren't you hungry?" The small girl asked as we sat down at her table.

"Not really." I admitted.

She introduced me to everyone around the table, and they all smiled and greeted me in return. There was one blond girl who kept giving me weird looks. I decided that I would avoid her. She didn't seem like the type of person you wanted to avoid.

The conversation flowed freely between everyone. Occasionally, someone would ask me a question and I would answer politely. I hated being the center of attention, and I felt like I was on display somehow. I looked around the lunchroom to find people staring and whispering. I couldn't help but think they were whispering about me…everyone except one table. Way in the back corner there sat five people all looking off in different directions. They looked bored. Each had a tray of food in front of them that they were not touching. They sat together, yet they seemed alone, but that was not why I couldn't seem to look away. They were all incredibly good looking. It was astounding how beautiful they all were, even the boys. There was a very large one with dark curly hair. He looked like he could be a body builder. The boy next to him was smaller yet very muscular with honey blond hair. A small pixie like girl sat next to him. She had very short black hair. The girl that sat opposite her could not have been more different. She had the figure of a model with long blond hair. The last boy next to her had strange untidy auburn colored hair. He was less bulky than the others, and looked to be the youngest.

"What are you staring at Bella?" The girl with the curly hair asked.

"Nothing." I responded quickly looking away as I blushed, but not before the bronze haired boy looked my way. Our eyes locked for a brief moment before he looked away apathetically. It was as if he had heard his name called, upon finding out who had said it, he had looked away uninterested.

"I see you have noticed the Cullen's." She smirked. "Emmett is the big one with curly hair. Jasper and Rosalie are the blonde's. They're twins; their last name is Hale. Alice is the short one with black hair, and Edward is the younger one with bronze hair."

"They're very good looking." I admitted without thinking causing me to blush embarrassingly.

She giggled. "Yes. But they're all together. Rosalie and Emmett, Jasper and Alice—and they _live_ together." She muttered scandalously. "Doctor Cullen and his wife adopted them. Their foster children."

"That was very nice of them to take on so many like that."

She shrugged. "I guess. I think Mrs. Cullen can't have children."

"That's too bad. Have they always lived in Forks?" I asked as I dared another look at the table. They were looking off in different directions again. I surely would have noticed them on one of my visits.

She shook her head. "No. They moved here a few years ago from Alaska."

I felt a pang of sympathy for them. It was clear they had never really been accepted by any of the students. Just then the bronze haired boy looked up at me and locked me in his gaze. I looked away as fast as I could, blushing again. He looked confused, and frustrated somehow. I mumbled a quick good bye to everyone at my table and rushed off to my next class.

I was mortified. I had been caught twice staring at them. Could I be a bigger freak? I found my next class, biology, with little trouble. I tried the door, but it was locked. I decided to drop off some books at my locker while I waited.

As I walked I couldn't help but think about that family. There was something strange about them. They all had very pale skin, paler than mine. They had deep purple circles under their eyes, but it did not take away from their beauty in any way. It was hard to say who was prettier, the tall blond girl, or the bronze haired boy.

The bell rang pulling me from my thoughts, and I quickly made my way back to my next class. I kept my head down as I walked towards the teacher with my slip of paper. Thankfully he didn't make me introduce myself. He pointed to a table in the back and told me to take a seat. As I looked at my new seat I stopped abruptly realizing who was sitting in the seat next to me. The bronze haired boy, Edward, sat motionless staring straight ahead at the board. I carefully made my way down the aisle to my seat tripping once over someone's bag. Thankfully, I caught myself on a table before my face could meet the floor. I blushed as I heard the others laugh around me.

I was thankful to get to my seat and slid into my chair without a word. I chanced a glance at the beautiful boy next to me to find him sitting tensely, staring at me confused. I tried to look away, but was caught up in his gaze. His eyes were almost black; there was just a hint of topaz around the edges. I could feel my breathing increase as he continued to stare.

"Are you all right?" I heard him ask. His voice sounded as smooth as velvet. It was hypnotizing.

"Y-yes." I stammered blinking my eyes slowly.

He pursed his lips, nodding once incredulously and looked away. Did he know something he shouldn't? He was the son of a doctor—had he found out about my secret? I dispelled my thoughts quickly. There was no possibly way for him to know that I was sick. His father wasn't even _my_ doctor. I still looked healthy enough, so there was no reason for him to think other wise. He must have been referring to my near face dive into the floor.

It took me a second before I could regain my composure and look away. I moved my hair to rest over my shoulder to hide myself from him as the teacher started his lesson. I tried to pay attention, but I couldn't get my mind off the seraphic creature sitting beside me.

At one point I chanced a look at him, instantly regretting it. He was looking at me again, or rather frowning. He seemed unnecessarily frustrated, as if he was expecting something. His eyes were darker somehow. He seemed to get more annoyed as the minutes passed. I had no idea what I had done to make him look at me like that.

I was thankful when the bell rang signally the end of class. I gathered my books together, turning my back to him.

"Hi. My name is Mike. You're Isabella right?"

I looked up to see a cute, baby faced, blond boy in front of me. His smile was warm and friendly. After the hostility I had just received from Edward it was nice to see a friendly face.

"Bella." I corrected.

He smiled. "What's your next class? I could walk you."

"Gym." I answered happily. I hated gym, but because of my condition I wasn't allowed to participate. This was a perk to being sick.

"Cool. Me too." He replied excitedly—a little too excitedly for me. He was cute and all, but I didn't date. It just wouldn't be fair. I would have to discourage him before he got any ideas.

I walked beside him to gym listening as he rambled on about this and that. I handed my note from my doctor to the coach. He frowned upon receiving it, and instructed me to sit on the bleachers and do my homework until the end of class. I happily complied.

By the end of class I was ready for a nap. It had been a long day, and my body was tired. I still had groceries to do, and a doctor's appointment. I turned in my signed slip to the office and then lumbered to my truck. I started the engine and turned the heater on. My eyes felt very heavy. I decided to lie down on the seat for a moment to rest before I drove anywhere. It wouldn't be good to drive this tired.

I must have fallen asleep because when I opened my eyes I noticed the sun had almost set. I sat up quickly looking at the clock. It was already 4:30! I had been asleep for two hours! I rubbed my eyes and looked around to find the parking lot completely empty. Shaking my head to clear it I put my truck in reverse and headed straight for the hospital. Groceries would have to wait. I had a doctor's appointment at 5:oo and I couldn't be late.

I rushed into the main entrance after quickly parking my truck. I was unfamiliar with this hospital, and I wasn't sure where to go.

"Dr. Spencer?" I asked the receptionist.

"You follow the green squares on the floor and they will lead you to the wing his office is in." She pointed down the hall. "Just follow the green squares all the way."

I nodded in thanks and took off down the hall. I walked faster than normal just in case I managed to get lost. I wasn't watching where I was going and bumped right into something very hard.

"Sorry." I mumbled as I blushed. I looked up and there in front of me stood the most beautiful doctor I had ever seen before. He had blond hair, and the most beautiful smile. He looked too young to be a doctor. I noticed his nametag--Dr. Cullen. This must be their father.

"That's quite all right." He smiled steadying me in my place. "Do you need help finding something?" He offered in a smooth voice, almost as angelic as Edward's.

"N-no." I stuttered. "I'm on my way to Dr. Spencer's office. I think I can find my way."

Just then I saw Edward walk around the corner and stand next to his father. My eyes grew wide as I watched him frown and narrow his eyes at me. I swallowed once, blushing as I dropped my head.

I noticed Dr. Cullen had not missed the exchange. "Have you met my son Edward? You two must go to school together."

"Yeah, we met." 'Sorta,' I added under my breath. I looked up quickly to find Edward smirking for some reason. I found myself getting incredibly frustrated with him and I scowled.

"I have to go. I have an appointment." I mumbled as I walked away.


	3. Chapter 3

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I woke the next morning not as tired as before. As soon as I pulled into the student parking lot Mike was at my truck. He had my door opened before I had even turned my truck off. I rolled my eyes as I leaned over to grab my backpack.

"Hey Mike."

"Hey Bella. I thought I would walk you to class." He cried happily.

"Thanks." I answered folding my arms across my chest. I didn't want to give him the opportunity to grab my hand, or touch me in any way. I was not interested in being anything but friends with him, although he seemed to have other ideas.

I kept my eyes diverted from Mike as I half listened to what he was saying. I glanced casually around the parking lot my eyes falling upon a set I was growing more and more familiar with.

Edward Cullen was leaning against the side of a very shiny silver Volvo, staring in my direction. His lips were pursed and he seemed to be scowling. I quickly looked away choosing to look at my feet. I had no idea what I had done to him to make him hate me so much. Irrational anger filled me as I began to march to my first class. Tears of anger blurred my vision. I entered my first class without even saying goodbye to Mike. I was more annoyed with myself than him. I had to stop letting him affect me in this way.

As the day wore on I grew more anxious as lunch approached. I wanted nothing more than to go up to him and put him in his place, but I knew I was too much of a coward to do anything like that. I decided that I would simply ignore him. I could be just as rude towards him as he was being towards me.

As I entered the cafeteria with my curly haired friend, who I know remembered was named Jessica; I carefully kept my eyes diverted from the table in the back corner where I was sure he would be sitting. I chatted along happily with the others pretending as if everything were normal. I refused to let that boy bother me anymore.

"Edward Cullen is staring at you." I heard Jessica whisper half way through lunch. My stomach lurched, and my body went stiff. Why couldn't he just leave me alone? What did he want from me?

"So." I answered a little harsher than I should have. I was staring at my half eaten sandwich in front of me. It suddenly didn't seem so appetizing to me anymore.

"He never notices anyone." She sounded amazed, and almost disappointed.

"He's not noticing me. Don't worry." I assured her. "In fact I'm pretty sure he hates me." I added glancing her way.

She seemed confused. "Why would he hate you?"

I looked back at my sandwich trying to hide the sad look on my face. "I don't know." I whispered.

It was quiet for a few moments. "He doesn't look like he hates you, and he's still staring."

I blushed. "Stop looking." I said through my teeth.

I heard her giggle beside me. I looked at her briefly to make sure she had stopped. My stomach felt uneasy as I contemplated her words. What had he looked like, if not angry and upset? Every time I had seen him in the past he was always frowning at me. What had she seen that I had missed? Could he really not hate me as I thought? Had I miss read his expressions?

I sighed sharply annoyed with myself. Why was I spending so much time thinking about him? He was just a boy-a boy I would soon never see again.

Without another word I got up from the table and emptied my tray in the trash. I grabbed my books and headed off to class, deciding to go with my original plan. I would simply ignore him. I didn't need any more problems that what I already had.

I was the first one in class. I found my seat quickly and took out my notebook. I doodled mindlessly as I heard the class fill with students. I didn't even bother looking up as Mike stopped by to say hi before going to his seat. I didn't want to chance seeing Edward walk in.

I clearly heard when the chair next to me moved and could sense his presence next to me. I refused to look his way. It was harder than I thought, fighting the urge to look at him.

"Are you enjoying your time in Forks?"

I stiffened at the sound of his musical voice. He didn't sound angry, merely curious. How odd…maybe Jessica had been right…

I shrugged once keeping my eyes on my notebook. What was there to enjoy? I hated the weather, I missed my mom, and I was dying. But then again I wasn't here because Forks was a great place. I was here to start over, and enjoy a normal life for as long as I could. I was here to be a teenager. One who wasn't constantly pitied, and babied.

I wanted nothing more than to look into his eyes once again, and hated that I felt that way. 'He's a jerk,' I kept reminding my self as I returned to my doodling.

I heard him chuckle softly beside me, and I narrowed my eyes. "Why did you move here?"

I couldn't understand why he was so interested in me. I was completely plain in every way. I wasn't exactly ugly, but there was nothing special about me. I was thin, almost too thin, but soft. I had very pale skin, but a clear complexion. With a little makeup, and the right color shirt I could look, ok. I had boring thick brown hair, and wide brown eyes, with full lips. He was clearly out of my league. He had the looks any model would die for. He was too beautiful; it almost hurt to look at him. I couldn't understand what he could possible want with me. I looked up at the teacher willing him to start class. I sighed when I noticed he was still organizing papers.

I shrugged again.

"Do you know anything?" He asked dryly.

I narrowed my eyes in anger. I could hear the impatience in his voice. It was clear he was not used to people ignoring him. He was probably used to always getting his way. All he had to do was bat his eyelashes and girls would swoon. I refused to be one of those girls.

Thankfully, class started just then. I dutifully turned my attention to the teacher in front and did my best to ignore the person sitting next to me. It wasn't easy. I could feel his eyes on me every now and again. I made the mistake of looking at him once to find him staring at me. I tried to look away, but I was trapped in his gaze. His eyes bore into me and I could feel my hands start to shake from the intensity. His eyes were lighter today and there was no hint of anger like I expected. He looked merely curious for some reason. I don't know how long we stared at each other before the teacher called on Edward. I quickly looked away hiding behind my hair for the rest of the period.

As soon as the bell rang I turned my back to him and gathered my things.

"You ready?"

I closed my eyes forcing myself to smile before I looked up. "Let's go Mike."

He smiled warmly in return and together we walked to the gym.

"So…What was going on between you and Cullen during class today?" Mike asked trying to keep his voice casual, but he still sounded disappointed.

"Nothing. Why?" Had I been that obvious?

He instantly perked up squaring his shoulders. "It just seemed like he was bothering you. You know if he's bothering you I can talk…"

"Everything's fine Mike." I replied cutting him off. I watched as his face fell slightly.

"But thanks for offering." I added hoping to cheer him up a little, and ease the guilt I felt.

"Sure." He shrugged.

We remained silent the rest of the way to the gym, and said a quick goodbye as we parted ways. I took out my math book as I watched the others file out of the locker rooms. I didn't know why I had to sit here. It was the last period of the day, why couldn't I just go home early? I sighed as I opened my book and began my homework.

It was harder than I thought it would be to concentrate. My mind kept going back to biology and how Edward had stared at me. His eyes were so intense. It was as if he were trying to lift my thoughts from my head. I was sure that his expression was not one of irritation, but expectant somehow. I was starting to feel guilty for how I had treated him. It was true that he had not been very nice to me in the beginning, but he had been nice enough today…well mostly. I decided that the next time he talked to me, if he was civil, I would be civil back. There was no need to hold grudges, and create enemies. I didn't have time for that.

I packed up my math book just as the bell rang. Once again I vacated the building to avoid the over protective, increasingly annoying, Mike Newton. He was a nice guy and I felt bad for avoiding him, but I just wasn't interested—even if I was—it was better this way.

It was raining hard outside, and I walked swiftly to my truck careful not to fall. I was soaked by the time I unlocked the door and climbed in. Shivering, I turned on my truck and started the heat rubbing my hands together to warm them. I looked around briefly noticing that others were heading out. I noticed Edward Cullen lopping ever so gracefully to his car. I hadn't noticed this morning but, clearly, it was the nicest car in the parking lot by far. "Figures." I whispered. "Not only is he beyond gorgeous, but he has money too."

Edward turned to look in my direction just then with a smirk playing on his lips. I looked away quickly, blushing. I quickly put my car in reverse and chanced one last look in his direction as I backed out of my parking space. He was chuckling softly, his eyes a light with humor.

Suddenly a car horn sounded behind me and I realized that I had stopped in the middle of the parking lot. I blushed furiously as I pulled out and drove away keeping my eyes fixed on the road.

Grocery shopping was uneventful. By the time I got home, and did my homework, I was too tired to cook. We had left over pizza and I excused my self shortly there after to go to bed.

That was the first night I dreamt of Edward Cullen.


	4. Chapter 4

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

The weather outside seemed to fit my current mood, gloomy, as I drove down the road. It had been almost two weeks since Edward had tried talking to me. He hadn't so much as looked my way since then. I was beginning to wonder if I had truly offended him. I had got what I wanted. I should be happy, but I couldn't help feeling disappointed, and a little guilty for my behavior.

I wanted to apologize to him, but I was intimidated. It was clear he wanted nothing to do with me. Not that I blamed him. I wasn't really that interesting. I had hoped that maybe we could have been friends, but after the second day of him ignoring me I knew that even that wasn't going to be possible.

I sighed sharply annoyed with myself, as I got out of my truck, slamming the door shut behind me. I was due for yet another check up with my doctor. I had promised my mother I would go twice a month.

I had been feeling especially tired lately, and I knew Dr. Spencer would not be pleased. I had already decided that I was not going to mention how faint I had felt today. He would force me to under go more testing, and I was not up for that. There was nothing he could do to help me, so why bother with the testing?

I greeted his receptionist with a smile. She checked me in quickly and told me to have a seat. I did not have to wait long before he called me in.

"Good afternoon Miss Swan. How are you today?" He asked motioning for me to have a seat.

"I'm ok. How are you?" I hedged.

He ginned. "I'm well, thank you."

"So, how are you really feeling?" He eyed me seriously. He knew I was stalling.

I sighed. "I'm tired…really tired."

He nodded his head as he made notes on my chart. "Are you experiencing any more pain?"

I shook my head. "No more than usual."

He nodded again, and continued with his line of questioning. He was not pleased to discover I had lost more weight, and he once again scolded me for not eating properly. I just hadn't been hungry, but I promised to do better. Thankfully, he did not need to perform any blood work since he had taken care of that with my last visit. By the end I was ready to leave.

As I got up from the examination table I felt a wave of dizziness wash through me. I shook it off not wanting to alarm the doctor. I took a deep breath and steadied myself before I said my final goodbyes and walked out the door.

By the time I was halfway down the hallway I was covered in a cold sweat, and my heart was racing. I convinced myself that I just needed to sit and rest for a few minutes-it would pass. I stopped, leaning my arm against the wall as I closed my eyes taking deep steady breaths.

"Bella?"

No, this was not happening. This was not happening. What was with him and hospitals?

"Bella?" I clearly heard Edward's beautiful voice coming closer, thick with concern.

"Carlisle." I heard him call, as he got closer.

I shook my head, trying to clear it. I did not want him to see me like this. I did not want anyone to know. I pushed off from the wall and plastered a smile upon my face just as Edward came to stand before me.

"Edward, what are you doing here?" I asked trying to keep my voice even, but even I could hear how weak it sounded.

"What's wrong?" He asked, blatantly ignoring my question.

"Nothing." I insisted firmly. I saw Dr. Cullen approaching and I groaned inwardly. I attempted to walk around Edward to escape, but I was too weak and faltered. As the floor grew closer to me everything became unclear. The last thing I remembered was feeling something cold wrap around me, then everything went black.

I frowned at the annoying beeping I could hear in the distance. It had woken me, and I was still so tired. I moaned softly as I tried to remember where I was. My hand felt funny. Everything was so unclear. I remembered going to school, and then I had a doctor's appointment. I got really dizzy and then….

I gasped opening my eyes quickly to find that I was still in the hospital attached to a heart monitor with an IV in my hand. That was where the beeping was coming from. I looked around the room and found Edward leaning against the wall smiling at me. He seemed totally at ease. His arms were crossed in front of his chest, and one leg was bent with his foot resting up against the wall.

I blushed, remembering he had been there when I had fainted.

He pushed off from the wall and came to the foot of my bed. "You gave me quite the scare." He admitted sheepishly, as if it were something to be ashamed of.

I looked away embarrassed. I hated being weak. More than that, I hated that Edward had seen me so weak.

"How are you feeling?" He questioned in a soft voice.

I sighed. "I'm fine." I answered as I sat up in the bed. I tried to keep my eyes diverted from the IV in my hand. I hated needles.

"You're not fine." He said sternly. "Bella, you just fainted."

I pursed my lips angrily. What did he care? He had ignored me and treated me like a leper the last few weeks. It was none of his business.

"I said I'm fine."

It was quiet for a few minutes. You could feel the tension in the room rising. I refused to tell him anything. I was not about to trust him with my secret.

Just then the door opened revealing Dr. Cullen followed by Dr. Spencer.

"It's nice to see you awake." Dr. Spencer said while he looked at my chart.

"Can you take this dumb heart monitor off me now?" I pleaded.

Dr. Cullen smiled warmly. "In a little while, not just yet." His voice was almost as beautiful as his sons.

I frowned, groaning inwardly.

"So Miss Swan…" Dr. Spencer began.

"Wait." I cried raising a hand to stop him. "Do they have to be here for this?" I asked gesturing towards Edward and his father.

"No." He answered shaking his head slowly. "If you would rather they leave…"

"Yes, I would." I answered quickly, again cutting him off.

Without another word Dr. Cullen and Edward walked out of the room shutting the door behind them. I sighed as I turned my attention back to Dr. Spencer.

"You have not been eating." He accused.

I looked down as my cheeks turned red. I started playing with my fingers nervously.

"This does not help with your Leukemia. Your blood sugar was dangerously low. You're lucky Edward was there to catch you before you hit the floor."

I nodded in reply without looking up. Another pang of guilt hit me as I remembered how rude I had been to him only minutes ago. What was wrong with me? He had been so nice to me. Why did I always act so defiantly around him?

"You need to eat at least three meals a day."

I looked up about to defend myself when he held his hand up to stop me.

"Three _complete_ meals. Not half a sandwich, or a few bites of toast."

I nodded glumly.

I watched as Dr. Spencer sighed and came to sit next to me in the chair by my bed. "I know it can be hard. You just have to make yourself. Your body needs all its energy to fight this. Keeping yourself hydrated is most important. It will help ward off feelings of nausea."

"I know." I whispered looking down and playing with a strand of my hair.

It was silent for a few minutes. "I want to see you next week at the same time to check your progress."

"But…"

"No buts." He said raising his hand. "I want to make sure you are eating, and run some tests."

"You already did that this month." I protested. I could hear the beeping of the heart monitor pick up as my heart started to race.

"Calm down." He sighed. "If you have not lost any more weight and seem to be in good condition next week I will postpone the testing all right?"

"Thank you." I whispered relieved. "When can I go home? My dad's going to start to worry."

He glanced over at my IV bag, which was almost empty, and then back at me. "I will send a nurse in to remove your IV and the heart monitor. You can leave once she is finished."

"Thanks Dr. Spencer. I will see you next week."

"Take care Miss Swan." He smiled as he left me alone in the room.

I was relieved when the nurse came in and freed me from all the devises I had been hooked up to. I happily thanked her and got up from the bed. I hated to admit it, but I was actually feeling much better.

I shrugged into my jacket and opened the door to leave, but stopped short as I looked at who was sitting across the hall. There sat Edward Cullen smiling at me. It was the most beautiful crooked smile I had ever seen. It took my breath away. I shook me head trying to clear it as he got up and came to stand in front of me.

"Are you feeling better?" He asked softly.

"Yes, thank you." I breathed. I smiled. "And thanks for catching me."

He grinned. "My pleasure."

I turned to walk down the hall and was joined by Edward. I bit my lip nervously as I searched for something to say. It did not escape my notice how close he was walking to me. All I had to do was move my arm ever so slightly and we would be touching…

"I've arranged to drive you home." Edward explained as we exited the building, pulling me from my thoughts.

"I have my truck, but thanks." I declined.

"Bella, I don't think you are in any condition to drive right now." He said seriously raising an eyebrow at me.

"I'm better now. I'm perfectly fine." I argued.

"You just fainted, and you are _not_ fine." He insisted arrogantly.

I clenched my hands into fists angrily. "You don't know anything!" I spat.

I saw his face harden for a moment, but it quickly cleared. His eyes turned soft. "I know you don't eat, you look exhausted most of the time, sometimes you are in so much pain, from just walking, that you want to sit down and cry."

My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. Tears welled in my eyes as he continued.

"I know that you put on a good act. You are sicker, and in more pain, than you let anyone--even your family--know."

Silent tears ran down my face as I looked into his eyes. They were so gently and caring. I watched as he lifted one of his hands to my face and hesitantly wiped away a single tear. His hands were like ice, yet my face felt on fire where he had touched me. My skin tingled in its wake.

He knew.

"Please let me drive you home?" He implored, his voice smoldering. I couldn't remember how to breath as his eyes bore intently into mine. I couldn't speak. I could only nod. He smiled triumphantly and led me to his car. He held the door open for me and closed it once I was settled.

His car was very nice, with leather seats. As soon as he was in the car he turned down the radio and turned the heat up. I couldn't help notice what was playing.

"Clair De Lune?" I asked curiously.

"You know Debussy?" He asked obviously surprised.

I shrugged. "Not well." I admitted. "My mother likes to play classical music around the house. I only know my favorites." I ended sadly. I missed my mother terribly.

"It's one of my favorites, too." He mused staring out the windshield.

I nodded and turned my head to look out my window and watched as the town passed by in a blur. At times like this I regretted my decision to leave, but I couldn't be selfish. It was for the best. She deserved to be happy, and to live her life. But I couldn't think about that now. I needed to find a way to convince Edward not to tell anyone. All my careful planning would be for nothing if he let it slip that I was sick.

"You miss her—your mother I mean." It wasn't a question more of an observation.

"Yeah." I sighed looking down at my hands in my lap.

"Why did you move here?" He asked gently.

I looked up to discover that we were already parked in front of my house. I decided to ignore his question. I was not ready to answer him--at least not truthfully--not yet anyway.

I turned to face him as I unbuckled my seat belt. "Edward, please don't tell anyone." I pleaded. "I'm not sure how much you know, or how you know, but please don't tell anyone that I am sick."

"I promise." His voice rang with sincerity, and I felt oddly comforted by his words. I smiled in return, before I turned to open my door.

"Thank you again." I muttered softly. He smiled widely, stunning me for a brief moment. I thought I heard him chuckle, but I wasn't sure. I shook my head back and forth to clear it as I shut the car door.

Thankfully, my father wasn't home yet so there was no need to explain why I was so late getting back. I quickly entered the house and started making dinner. I made sure to make a complete, well-balanced meal. I would be damned if I was going to let Dr. Spencer use me as a pincushion again.

For the second time Edward Cullen starred in my dreams.


	5. Chapter 5

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

My dream last night had been disturbing. I had dreamt that I was in great trouble and Edward was trying to save me. He had searched and searched but something was stopping keeping him from finding me. I felt so lost and alone. All I wanted to do was hold him, and feel his arms securely around me. At one point in the night I had woken in a cold sweat breathing heavily. It had felt so real…but what did it mean? What was it about him that made me feel protected? Never had I felt so safe, as I had imagining myself in his arms.

I was on edge all morning anxiously waiting to see Edward again. I wondered, worriedly, if he would be true to his word and keep my secret. I was so wrapped up in my thoughts that I completely forgot my truck was still at the hospital, until I walked out the front door and found it missing.

"Shoot." I grumbled as I slammed the door shut behind me, heading for the phone. Now I would have to call Charlie for a ride. I would be late for sure.

Grumbling, I made my way to the phone on the wall in the kitchen. Just as I was about to dial the number a soft knock came to the front door.

Confused, I hung the phone up and went to the door. I openly gaped at the person I found standing there. There on my doorstep stood Edward Cullen in all his glory.

"Good morning." He muttered as he tried to hide his smile. His eyes danced with mirth.

I stood in front of him frozen. I blinked my eyes a few times confused as to why he was at my house. He was waiting for me to speak, but I couldn't seem to find words. I watched as his face fell slightly and his eyes became worried.

"Or…maybe not. Are you feeling ok?" He questioned with raised eyebrows.

I blushed deep red and looked away. "What are you doing here?" I hedged not wanting to talk about anything that could lead back to my illness.

"I thought you might need a ride." He answered smoothly.

I peered around him to find his silver Volvo parked in the driveway. I looked up at him again and smiled warily, "Thanks."

He grinned and led me to his car. As before he opened my door for me before taking his place in the drivers seat.

It was quiet for the first few minutes. I nervously nibbled on my lower lip not sure of what to say. I thought back to my dream and blushed as I remembered how much I had needed him then. This was not good. We could only be friends, even if by some miracle he wanted more, it just could never be. It was just a dream after all, nothing more.

"You never did tell me why you moved here." He asked suddenly breaking the silence.

"What?" I asked distractedly as I looked over at him.

He chuckled softly. "Why did you move to Forks, you never told me."

"Oh. Uh…it's complicated."

"I think I can keep up." He pressed.

I sighed. This was not a conversation I was willing to have at the moment. I could just give him the same answer I had given to everyone else, but it felt wrong somehow. I didn't want to lie to him, but I didn't trust him enough with the truth.

"You don't have to tell me if you would rather not." He explained after a few minutes. I could clearly hear the curiosity in his voice. He wanted to know, but he seemed willing to wait until I was ready.

I contemplated telling him my real reasons for moving. He somehow already knew I was sick, did it really matter if he knew the whole story? It might feel good to have someone who knew…not just what I was willing to share…but everything.

"It's not that exactly." I hedged. I looked down at my hands as I played with a strand of my hair. "Maybe when I'm ready." I whispered.

"I'll be here." He promised.

I looked up at him and saw the sincerity in his eyes. I smiled weakly in return and our eyes held. A strange new energy seemed to fill the air around us as we stared unrelentingly into each other's eyes. Time seemed to hold still as the silence intensified between us. My hands started to shake and I could feel myself becoming light headed. I didn't know what was happening, I only knew there was no way I could look away. As my head started to spin I realized I wasn't breathing and I gasped for air breaking our contact.

"We need to get going or we'll be late." He explained in a low voice.

A light rose crossed my cheeks as I nodded in reply. I had been so lost in his eyes that I hadn't even realized we were at school. As soon as I stepped outside I felt many eyes on me. I looked around to find people gawking and whispering as they watched Edward come to my side. I looked down blushing a deep crimson red and hid behind my hair.

"Come on." Edward urged gently leading me to my first class.

I kept my head down and remained silent as we came to a stop at the door to my first class. I turned to say a quick goodbye to Edward and was shocked by what I saw. His face seemed torn, and his brow was furrowed. Timidly, he reached up and brushed my hair away from my face and behind my ear. He smiled turning on his heal and disappearing around the corner leaving me speechless. I stood motionlessly staring after him as my classmates passed me to enter the classroom. I jumped at the sound of the first bell and darted inside blushing as I sat down at my desk.

My morning passed by rather quickly. I received a few strange looks from some of the students, but no one had approached me. My luck was soon to run out. There standing in front of the door to my math class stood Jessica. She smiled widely once she saw me and waved. I tensed. In my short time here I had quickly learned that she was the school gossip. I groaned inwardly, knowing what she probably wanted.

"Hey Bella. How are you today?" She asked knowingly.

"I'm fine, Jessica thanks." I answered politely not bothering to stop and chat. She quickly caught up to me and took her seat next to me.

"Did you have a good morning?" She fished.

"It was ok."

"Anything special happen?"

"No." I replied quickly. Her face fell and I could see the curiosity burning in her eyes.

"I didn't see your truck in the parking lot today." She hedged. "How did you get to school?"

"I got a ride with a friend." I simply muttered. Surely I could call Edward a friend by now.

"With who? Do I know them?"

I sighed. She was relentless. "Edward Cullen."

Her eyes lit up upon my confession and a huge smile spread across her face. "Tell me everything."

"There's nothing to tell Jess. I needed a ride and he gave me one. End of story."

She narrowed her eyes incredulously and pursed her lips. "How did he know you needed a ride? Did you call him or something?"

"No. I did not call him." I looked up searching for the teacher, but he was late. Of all the days to be late!

"Then how did he know to come get you?" She persisted.

"He just did Jess, ok?"

She sighed defeated. Suddenly a wide smile spread across her face and her eyes lit up again. "Do you think he likes you?"

I blushed at her question. No. I did not think Edward Cullen liked me. But I feared _I_ might like him, or at least need him, more than I should.

"No. We're just friends."

"I've never seen Edward Cullen be _just friends_ with anyone before you." She stated suggestively.

I blushed again. "He's nice." I qualified hoping that would be enough to stop her interrogation.

"Nice? That's all you have to say? Are you blind Bella? He's gorgeous!"

My blush deepened and she smiled knowingly at me. "Do you like him?"

I sighed annoyed. "Yes." I whispered curtly. I could feel the blush on my cheeks spread down my neck.

"How much do you like him?" She asked triumphantly.

Thankfully, the teacher had finally arrived. "It doesn't matter how I feel about him. We can never be more than just friends." I whispered as the teacher began his lesson.

She frowned and looked confused but mercifully, she did not pursue the topic further. I kept my eyes forward for the rest of class. As soon as the bell rang I jumped from my seat and raced from the room. I did not want to get trapped by Jessica's questions again.

I didn't feel like going to lunch to endure the whispering and staring again. I was tired and just wanted to rest. I didn't have my truck so I decided to go to the gym and lay down on the mats there. I had an apple in my bag I could eat.

I found a semi-clean mat in the weight room, and laid down using my bag as a pillow, and my jacket as a blanket. I closed my eyes enjoying the warmth of the room. I didn't know what to do about Edward. For some reason I seemed to be drawn to him. I needed him more than I liked to admit. There was something about him, I couldn't quite place, that made him different than anyone I had ever met. Though I was scared to trust him, instinctively I knew I could—that of everyone I had ever met—he was the most trustworthy of all.

It didn't matter really. In a few months time I would soon be too sick for school, and would never see him again. One solitary tear fell down my cheek, as I thought of never seeing his beautiful smile again. He was my guardian angel.

"Bella?"

I gasped as my eyes flew open. I blushed as I wiped at my face erasing all my tears. I was so distracted that I hadn't heard the door open. Before me stood a very anxious looking Edward.

"Yes?" I asked.

"Are you ok?" He asked as he came to kneel down in front of me.

"Yeah. I'm great." I blushed.

He stared at me skeptically for a short moment. "Why aren't you at lunch?"

I shrugged. "I have an apple. It's no big deal."

He frowned disapprovingly. "Bella, you need to eat more than just an apple. Let me buy you lunch."

I sighed. "I have money Edward. I can buy my own lunch."

He smiled. "Let's go then." He got up and offered me his hand.

I bit my lip nervously. There's nothing I wanted more than to grab his hand and have lunch with him, but I didn't want to face everyone. I wanted to be alone.

I shook my head gently. "You go. I'd rather be alone right now."

He narrowed his eyes and his face became calculating. "Fine. Then I shall bring lunch to you."

Before I could protest he was gone. I sat bewildered as I awaited his return. Why was he so concerned? Why did he care so much if I ate or not? My head was spinning as I tried to understand the mystery that was Edward Cullen. Just days ago he had treated me as a pariah, and now I was his new best friend.

Edward returned faster than seemed possible with a tray full of food. He smiled as he sat down next to me on the mat.

"You didn't get all this for me did you?" There was more food that I could have eaten in an entire day.

He shrugged. "I didn't know what you would like." He explained innocently. "Now eat, please."

I sighed in defeat grabbing some french fries and dipping them into ketchup. The most beautiful crooked smile spread across his face I chewed my food.

"How has your morning been?" He asked conversationally.

I shrugged as I took a sip of the coke he had gotten for me. He watched me eat for a few minutes in silence. I felt a little self-conscious and was about to ask something, but I was cut off.

"Tell me what you're thinking?"

I was startled by his question. I looked up into his eyes and was caught off guard by their intensity, and blurted out the first thing that crossed my mind. "I was wondering why you were being so nice to me all of a sudden."

"Is it a crime to be nice to someone?" He asked lightly.

"No. But you haven't always been this friendly towards me. I was just wondering what changed?"

He pursed his lips, "I'm sorry about that."

I put a few more fries in my mouth waiting for him to explain more.

"You never answered my question." I pressed.

He sighed. His icy sweet breath fanned out across my face making my head swirl. It smelt so good, I wanted more. I wanted to lean in and taste it. I shook my head as I cleared it blushing slightly.

"I'm not the best friend for you Bella." He stated seriously. "If you're smart you'll avoid me."

I chose to ignore his warning, and focused what else he had said. "So we're friends then?"

He grinned, and his eyes twinkled wildly. "I suppose we can try. But I'm warning you I'm not a good friend for you. It might be healthier for you if we weren't." He smiled lightly, but I could see the seriousness in his eyes.

I scoffed taking him off guard. "Like I'm that worried about my health." I mumbled.

"You should be." He cried harshly.

I stared at him wide eyes as I felt my eyes tear up. I looked away quickly hiding my face from him.

"I'm sorry." He whispered. I could hear the genuine regret in his tone. Instinctively, I knew he was saying sorry for more than just his harsh words.

"If only you knew." I barely said above a whisper. It remained quiet between us for a few minutes. Carefully, I turned to look at him and saw that he was looking at me with sad eyes. He smiled at me, and I smiled back warily.

He reached out and slowly tucked a small strand of my hair behind my ear. "If I only knew what?" He asked gently.

I looked into his eyes and could see only caring and concern there. I wanted to tell him, but was it right to burden him in that way? He seemed to have kept quiet about what happened in the hospital the previous night. I could trust him right?

I opened my mouth to speak just as the bell ending lunch rang. I closed my mouth and looked away. I swallowed hard fighting with the decision. I got up gathering my things as I walked towards the door.

I turned to find Edward right behind me. "Later." I promised.

He nodded his head in return, "Later then."

I walked to class slowly dreading the end of the day. I knew he was not going to let this one go. I needed to figure out how much I was willing to tell him.


	6. Chapter 6

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I arrived to Biology before Edward and took my seat. Mike was quick to join me perching himself on the edge of the table.

"Hey Bella. I didn't see you at lunch today. Is everything all right?"

"Yeah Mike everything is good. Thanks."

"That's good." He muttered. "So I noticed you didn't have your truck with you this morning…is it running ok?"

"Yes, my truck is perfectly fine."

"Oh." He stated lamely. We both looked up as Edward entered the room and took his seat next to me at the table. Mike turned back to me choosing to ignore his presence.

"So I was wondering…if maybe…you know…if you might need a ride home today…I mean I could give you one…if you want." A faint blush crossed his face as he looked at me with hopeful eyes.

I contemplated allowing Mike to take me home briefly. It would give me time to think through my answer to Edward's question, but it might give Mike the wrong idea. Most prevailing was my desire to be alone with Edward again. I knew it was wrong, but I craved his company too much to pass up the opportunity.

I say Edward tense slightly just before I gave Mike my answer. His head tilted minutely in my direction. He seemed anxious all of a sudden, as if he was nervous to hear my answer.

"Thanks Mike, but I already have a ride." I shrugged.

"Oh. Ok then…well I better get to my seat." He muttered dejectedly.

I sighed as I felt twinges of guilt for what I had just done. I turned to look at Edward, and was surprised to find him staring at me with his eyebrows furrowed. He looked confused by something. Had I been wrong to assume he was giving me a ride?

"You are still giving me a ride right?" I asked uncertainly, blushing slightly at being so forward in my questioning.

He said nothing and I looked down. "I mean it's ok. I'll just call Charlie. Don't worry about it."

"No. No." He said quickly. "I'm giving you a ride."

"It's ok really. You don't have to." I assured him. I chanced a look at him from the corner of my eye and noticed he was smiling. It was so beautiful it took my breath away.

"I want to." He assured me seriously.

Speechless, I nodded as our eyes held. My head began to spin as I once again forgot to breath. I gasped for air and could have sworn I heard him chuckle. I was about to question him when the teacher came in starting class.

It was a very long afternoon.

"So." He muttered in an off hand tone, as he pulled out of the school parking lot, "It's later."

I sighed. He was wasting no time. This was the part of the day I had been dreading. I could hardly concentrate on my homework in gym as I contemplated every possible scenario. By the end of the hour I had made no progress--I was still undecided as to what I should do.

"What is it you wanted to know?" I hedged trying to bide my time.

He grinned. "I believe you were about to tell me why your health seems to be of little concern to you."

I clenched my jaw, closing my eyes, as I turned my head towards my window. There seemed to be two reactions people always had once they found out I was sick, pity or fear—by abandonment. I didn't know if I could handle either one from Edward.

"Bella." He urged gently.

I opened my eyes and was surprised to see that I we were already at the hospital. We were parked next to my truck. I looked over at Edward and could see the deep concern in his eyes as they pleaded with me to tell him what was going on.

"I…I…" My throat felt tight and my mouth suddenly became extremely dry. I could feel tears forming in my eyes. I shook my head gently back and forth.

I turned quickly in my seat and opened my door stepping outside. Swiftly, I walked to the driver side door of my truck, but was stopped by a cold hand on my arm. I turned and found him standing next to me holding my forearm in a firm grip.

"I have to go Edward." I said as sternly as I could, knowing my voice sounded weak. It had started to rain, but I didn't care. I could feel the cold drops as they soaked through my hair, but I couldn't be bothered to put my hood up.

I shook my arm trying to free myself but he held firm. "Let go." I cried as tears ran down my face. "I need to go. Please."

"Bella. Please just talk to me. You can't run forever. Let me help you."

Something inside of me snapped at his words. Help me? How the hell was he going to help me? No one could help me now. I yanked hard one last time freeing my self from his hold and glared up at him. "You can't help me Edward. No one can." I spat angrily.

"Please just…"

"I'm dying ok. Feel better? Now you know my deep dark secret." I yelled cutting him off in mid-sentence, not caring about what he wanted to say. "I have Leukemia. I moved here to spare my mother the painstaking job of taking care of me, and watching me die." My tears had become a steady stream down my face as they mixed with the rain. "Are you happy now? Now you know everything. No more secrets." I whispered bitterly.

Edward said nothing he simply stared at me in awe, seemingly taken off guard by my confession. "You can go now. Thanks for the ride."

I turned quickly and opened my door. Just as I was getting in I felt another tug on my arm.

"Just leave me alone Edward. Just leave me alone." I whispered. I felt him release my arm instantly at my request. I got into my truck and left the parking lot as fast as I could, never once looking back at him. I couldn't bear to see his reaction.

Half way home I pulled over to the side of the road and slumped over on my seat. The tears had become too thick for me to drive safely. I sobbed for what felt like hours. When there were no more tears I righted myself and again began for home.

I pulled up to my house and my eyes widened. There in my driveway sat a silver Volvo. What more could he want from me? I took a deep breath and opened my door, choosing to ignore the car sitting in my driveway. As soon as my door was open I saw him step out. I looked down keeping my eyes on my feet as I walked to the front door of my house.

"Bella."

I sighed stopping in mid-stride. It was better to get this over with now than at school where there would be witnesses. I turned to look at him, waiting.

He stepped closer to me and stretched out his hand resting it on the side of my face. His eyes were soft, and filled with an emotion I couldn't identify. I wanted to send him away, but I couldn't seem to get my mouth to work. The feeling of his hand on my face sent goose bumps up and down my body. It felt incredible. Unconsciously, I leaned into his touch and I could feel his thumb start to gently stroke my cheek.

His eyes lingered on my face for a few moments and I could see worry creep within. I could only imagine how I looked after my melt down. I tried to look away to hide myself from him, but his eyes penetrated into mine holding me hostage.

"Oh Bella." He sighed.

I tried to swallow but there seemed to be a knot in my throat and I was unable. Before I knew what was happening I found myself in his arms cradled against his chest. At first I tried to pull away, but as new tears started to fall down my face, tears I didn't know I had left, I found myself clinging to him tightly. I grabbed at his shirt pulling myself as close to him as possible. He held me firm in his arms saying nothing as my tears stained his shirt.

He held me wordlessly until my eyes, once again, ran dry. He pulled me from his chest and peered down at me with a small smile on his lips.

"I'm sorry." I whispered dropping my head. I suddenly felt extremely embarrassed by my outburst and could sense the familiar blush creep up onto my face.

I felt his cold hand under my chin as he pulled my face up to look at him. "Don't be." He insisted seriously.

We stared at each other for a long moment. I hadn't realized how late it was getting until I felt myself shiver from the cold. It had stopped raining, but there was still a light mist in the air.

He sighed. "You should get inside and change into dry clothes."

I nodded my head in agreement, still unable to speak.

"May I pick you up for school tomorrow?"

I was a little taken aback by his request. I nodded my head, mutely, in reply. After everything he had just witnessed he still wanted to be around me—he bewildered me. I wondered if I would ever truly be able to figure him out.

He smiled widely at me before dropping his hand from my face. "Get inside. I'll see you tomorrow." He promised.

"Oh, and Bella."

I heard him call just as I had unlocked my front door. I turned to find him perched against the open drivers side door.

"Sleep well." He smiled, slipping deftly into the seat of his car.

He was already half way down the street when I finally found my voice. "Thanks. You too." I whispered too late.


	7. Chapter 7

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

The hot water of the shower soothed my aching muscles. I hadn't realized how cold I was until I actually entered the shower. I shivered violently for the first few minutes as the hot water seeped into my skin.

I leaned forward resting my hands against the front of the shower allowing the water to run freely onto my head. Everything I had been working so hard to conceal had been destroyed in a matter of minutes, but I couldn't seem to be bothered by it. For reasons I did not understand I trusted Edward. He made me feel safe and secure. The way he had touched me and held me… I smiled as I remembered his icy skin against my tear stained cheek. He had been so gentle, and tender my stomach twisted at the memory.

He knew yet he had not run away. Never once did I see any trace of pity in his eyes. It was as if me being sick didn't matter to him. For so long being sick was simply who I was. It was strange having someone want to get to know me—for someone to treat me like a real person with thought, ideas, hopes and dreams. It felt so good to not have to hide from someone for once.

He had been right. There were many things I hid from my loved ones to protect them. It was bad enough they had to watch me suffer; they didn't need to know how awful it was for me sometimes. But somehow Edward did. He knew when I was in pain, even when I disguised it. He knew more than he should. He was an utter mystery to me. There was something off about him and his family. I didn't know what he was, but I was determined to find out.

I heard the front door open and shut, and I turned the water. I hadn't realized how late it was. I toweled dry and quickly got dressed.

"Hey dad." I called as I bounded down the stairs.

"Hey Bells. How was your day?" He asked as he sat in a kitchen chair removing his boots.

"Good. What do you want for dinner?" I opened the refrigerator to see what was available.

"Doesn't matter to me." He hung up his jacket and headed into the living room.

It was too late to make anything big so I decided on grill cheese sandwiches. They were quick and easy. I still had homework and wanted to go to bed early to get a good nights rest before tomorrow.

I was grateful for Charlie's unperceptive nature. He didn't seem to notice how early I excused myself for bed, nor how antsy I seemed to be during dinner.

I was extremely fidgety as finished up my homework. By 9:30 I was ready for bed. I tossed and turned most of the night, anxious to see Edward in the morning. Eventually, I fell asleep cursing my alarm when it went off in the morning. I sluggishly made my way to the bathroom to get ready, with my toiletry bag in hand.

I sighed as I looked at my reflection. I looked tired and pasty. I wondered if I would ever look healthy again. I rolled my eyes and got to work on the tangled mess that was my hair. I put on the final touches, choosing to wear part of it back in a barrette. I took one last look in the mirror, sighing at how pale I seemed and carefully made my way down the stairs so as not to trip.

It was getting late. I had taken longer than normal in the bathroom getting ready, not that it had helped. I quickly grabbed a granola bar and practically swallowed it whole washing it down with milk from the carton. I grabbed my bag deciding to wait for Edward outside.

I opened the front door and to my surprise I found him already in my driveway holding the passenger side door open for me. He was grinning as he waited for me.

I blushed smiling back weakly, turning to lock the door. Slowly, I made my way to the open door being extra careful with my footing. To my dismay it had snowed all night covering everything in a light layer of snow. It looked pretty, but to an accident-prone person like me, it was a slippery nightmare.

As soon as I was strapped in he closed my door and made his way to the driver's side door, and got in. He quickly turned the car on fiddling with the dials blasting heat throughout the car.

I nervously bit my bottom lip not sure of what to expect. After yesterday so much had changed between us. I didn't know what to say.

He stared at me for a moment. His eyes freely roamed my face. It was as if he were looking for something, what I was not sure of.

"Did you sleep well?"

I shrugged. There was no use in lying, and I did not want to explain why I had trouble sleeping to him.

"Did you?"

He smirked, chuckling once. "My night was pleasant."

I furrowed my brows at him in confusion. What was so funny about my question?

He grinned at my expression turning to look at the road as he pulled out of my driveway.

"It's great to finally have some snow." He said conversationally.

"Not really." I muttered honestly.

"You don't like the cold?" He sounded puzzled.

I shook my head. "Or the wet."

"This must be a difficult place for you to live." He surmised.

I shrugged. "It doesn't really matter."

"Why not?"

I sighed. "I'm not here for my enjoyment."

His eyebrows knit in confusion for a short moment then a trace of realization crossed his face. "Don't you think you should be able to decide how best to spend your time?" He demanded. His voice had a sharp edge to it I had not expected.

I suddenly realized that he thought my mother had sent me to Forks. Nothing could be further from the truth. I had to set him right.

"_I,_"I stressed, "have. No one sent me here. I sent myself. I told you yesterday. I couldn't bear allowing my mother see me in the end…" I dropped my head and fiddled with a piece of my long hair. "No one should have to see that." I whispered.

It was quiet for a moment. I took a deep breath to prevent the tears that were forming in my eyes from falling down my face. I smiled and looked up. "This way I get to spend some time with Charlie, and get to know my father before it's too late. I know I'm not being exactly fair to him either."

I shrugged, "It's the best compromise I could think of."

"How old are you Bella?" He questioned with a hint of frustration for some reason in his tone.

"I'm seventeen." I answered automatically.

"You don't seem seventeen."

I shrugged and then smiled. "My mom always said that I was old for my age and that I got more middle aged each year." I sighed. "Someone had to be the adult, make sure the bills got paid, and put food in the house."

It was quiet for a moment and I noticed that we were parked in the school parking lot. It was mostly empty.

"Tell me about your mother." He finally asked. I looked over at him to find him staring at me with curious eyes.

"My mother…well she looks a lot like me, except she's prettier." He raised an eyebrow at me as I continued. "She's very young for her age. She's the total opposite from me in many ways. I guess that's why we seem to get along so well. She's outgoing and a lot braver than me. She can be irresponsible and somewhat eccentric at times." I chuckled once shaking my head remembering her odd tendencies.

I sighed. "She's my best friend." I added despondently. I missed her something terrible. I didn't want to talk about my family anymore it made me sad. I wanted to find out more about him. He was such a mystery to me.

"Tell me about your family, or more about you. I know your father is a doctor but that's about it."

I noticed his hands tense slightly on the steering wheel, and for a moment I wondered why. Did it bother him to talk about his life?

"What do you want to know?" He asked carefully. His voice sounded very guarded.

"Well I know you have four siblings and you were all adopted. What happened to your parents?"

"They died long ago." He answered casually

"Oh." I said embarrassedly. "I'm sorry." I whispered blushing.

I saw a small smile cross his lips. "It's ok. I hardly remember them. I was young when they passed, and I have been with Carlisle and Esme for so long now. They are all I really know, all I really need." He muttered seriously.

"You seem close to them." I stated. It was clear by his tone that he loved them very much.

"Yes." He smiled. "They are the best people I know."

"You're lucky to have them."

"I know."

"What about your siblings?"

"What about them?"

I looked around quickly and noticed the parking lot was almost full. I didn't have much time left. I was not going to be deterred. I could tell he was being evasive and I wanted to know what he was trying to hide from me.

"What's their story?"

"That's not for me to tell." He responded automatically.

I frowned. I opened my mouth to ask another question but was cut off.

"The first bell is going to ring soon we need to get to class." He announced.

I gathered my bag and opened my door, not bothering to look at the people in the parking lot. Edward walked me to my first class as he had the previous morning. I turned to say goodbye, but stopped short as I looked up at him. He was focusing on something behind me with narrowed eyes. I looked behind me to find Mike Newton walking down the hall towards me. I usually didn't see Mike until lunch. I turned to face him confused as to what he would want.

"Hey Bella."

"Hi Mike."

"I was wondering if I could ask you something."

"Um…" I glanced back over my shoulder at Edward. He stood frozen behind me, his face blank. "Sure Mike. What's up?"

"Alone?" He asked peering over my head.

I groaned inwardly. What could he possibly want that would require us being alone? This could not be good.

I followed him down the hallway a short ways away from Edward. I hoped he would wait for me.

"What is it Mike?" I asked growing impatient.

He smiled nervously. "Well there's this thing happening in a few weeks. There's a group of us heading down to First Beach. We're having a bonfire with food and everything."

"Sounds like fun."

"Yeah. It will be. I was just wondering if maybe you wanted to come along?"

I hesitated and bit my lip nervously. "Like a date?" I asked.

He blushed. "It doesn't have to be…I mean it's just a bunch of us getting together, like a group thing. Jessica will be there Angela too and Tyler, you know our lunch table."

I nodded. "Can I think about it?"

He smiled. "Sure, you can let me know later."

"Thanks Mike. I got to go the bells going to ring soon."

"See ya later Bella." He smiled as he walked towards his first class.

I turned back to my classroom and smiled. Edward was still there waiting for me. He smiled crookedly in return. "See you later?" I asked more than stated.

He nodded as he reached up and stroked my hair once with the back of his hand before turning on his heel and walking in the other direction.


	8. Chapter 8

I found Jessica waiting for me in front of my last class before lunch. She looked just as anxious to talk to me as she had the day before.

I sighed. I decided to cut her off before she could interrogate me about Edward again.

"Are you going to go to First Beach?" I asked as soon as I was within hearing range.

She seemed slightly taken aback by my question. "Yeah. Are you?"

"I was thinking about it."

"It will be fun. You should come." She began telling me all the activities they were planning and listing all the names of people who would be attending. I was not thrilled to find out that Lauren would be there, but I was satisfied that I had successfully distracted her.

The class seemed to go on forever. I anxiously jumped from my seat as soon as the bell rang and headed out of the classroom. Just as I walked over the threshold of the classroom door my toe caught. I closed my eyes tightly preparing to meet the floor. I felt something cold and strong wrap around me and looked up to find Edward smiling down at me. I blushed as he set me back on my feet. He grabbed my book bag that had fallen onto the floor and slung it over his shoulder.

He smirked.

"Thanks." I mumbled embarrassed.

"Shall we?" He asked.

I nodded in reply following him into the lunchroom. All eyes were on us as I trailed after him into the lunch line. I kept my head down avoiding all the curious looks that people were giving us. I didn't bother objecting as he reached for a tray and began to fill it with food. I watched as he paid for the food, and quietly led us to a table off in a corner.

"Eat." He commanded pushing the tray towards me as soon as I had taken a seat.

"Aren't you going to eat anything?"

He shrugged and then smiled. "I had a big breakfast."

I frowned and reached forward grabbing a blueberry bagel tearing a piece off and chewing slowly. He was watching me eat intently. It made me feel uncomfortable. I looked away and noticed Edward's family sitting across the room. The small pixie one, I recognized as Alice, was looking our way with a small smile across her lips. I wondered what she was smiling at. It was amazing how her smile seemed to make her even more beautiful just like her brother, if that were even possible. They were all so beautiful—too beautiful.

"Tell me what you're thinking?" Edward asked suddenly.

I looked back and locked eyes with him. Mesmerized by the intensity of his stare I blurted out what was on my mind before thinking. "I was wondering what made you all so beautiful."

I instantly turned deep red and looked down at the table. Stupid!

"I could ask you the same question." He responded after a few minutes. I could plainly hear the smile in his voice.

I could feel my cheeks heat up, the blush on my face only intensifying at his words. I rolled my eyes. I was not ugly, but I was far from beautiful. I choose to ignore him and tore off another piece of bagel.

"I think your friends are angry with me for stealing you." He smiled.

"They'll live."

"Will you be going then?"

I raised my eyebrows in confusion at him. "Going?"

He chuckled. "To First Beach." He clarified.

"I'm not sure." I hesitated briefly wondering if I was brave enough to ask my next question. "Will you be going?" We were friends now I reasoned. Friends invited other friends to things.

"I don't think I was invited." His lips twitched at the ends as he fought a smile. "But I'll be going out of town with my brothers anyway."

"Oh." I said trying to hide my disappointment. "Where will you be going?"

"Camping. We like to camp."

"Well, have fun."

"We'll try." He smiled with a twinkle in his eye. I felt as though I were missing something—maybe an inside joke of some sort, I wasn't sure.

I took a sip of my apple juice and took a few more bites of my bagel. I tried to hide a yawn, but saw Edward frown at me. Not sleeping well was catching up to me. I was ready for a nap. I rubbed my eyes tiredly trying to make myself more alert.

"You're exhausted." He stated. There was no question in his voice.

I smiled. "I'm ok. There are only two more periods. I can make it."

He raised his eyebrows incredulously. "Bella you need to rest more and take care of yourself."

"I do." I insisted.

He raised an eyebrow at me skeptically. "They are blood typing in biology and you only study during gym. I think you can afford to go home early."

Wait how did he know what I did during gym? "How did you know…" I shook my head deciding to leave it for another day. I had a point I would not be missing much. The smell of blood made me ill, and Charlie would not mind picking me up…

"Fine. I'll go home after lunch."

He smiled victoriously getting out of his seat and coming to my side.

"What are you doing?" I asked perplexed.

"Taking you home." He muttered as if it were obvious. "I'm your ride remember?"

"No. You can't skip. I'll call Charlie. He won't mind."

He shook his head before I was even done speaking. "I was planning on skipping anyway. You just gave me a valid reason." He smiled the crooked smile I loved so much stunning me, making me speechless.

He quickly emptied my tray of food and I followed him outside. I went to the front desk to excuse myself while he got his car.

The nurse new of my condition and there was no problem with getting myself excused. I yawned again as I walked to his car. A nap would defiantly be good, though I hated that he always seemed to be right.

As soon as I was strapped in he took off. I closed my eyes resting my head back against the seat. He had classical music playing but I was not familiar with whoever it was. But I couldn't help relax further as it flowed throughout the car.

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I remember is feeling weightless. I opened my eyes with a start looking all around. I was in Edward's arms being carried up the stairs to my bedroom. I turned red as I squirmed trying to free myself from his hold, but he held tighter.

He set me down on my bed very gently and smiled. "You fell asleep and I didn't want to wake you." He explained. His eyes were liquid gold, and so tender. "You looked so peaceful." He muttered as he reached out and softly ran his thumb along my jaw. Though his skin was ice cold, my skin burned red hot where he had touched me. I could feel my heart accelerate as he looked deep into my eyes.

"I should leave." He announced backing away from my bed.

I frowned. I wanted him to stay. I wanted to talk more. I opened my mouth to protest but he raised one hand to stop me.

"You need to rest." He insisted. "I'll pick you up again tomorrow if that's alright."

"That's fine." I verified turning a soft shade of pink.

He grinned. "Sleep well Bella. 'Till tomorrow."

I watched him turn and leave my room shutting the door behind him. I flung myself back on my bed taking a few deep breaths. I didn't know how long him picking me up for school was going to last, but I never wanted it to end. I tuned on my side with a wide smile on my face and closed my eyes.


	9. Chapter 9

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

**Author's note-- To answer some questions. Edward is not attracted to Bella's blood like in Twilight because she is sick. It smells different to him in a good way, but nowhere near as potent as it could be. **

**Yes, he can smell from her blood that she has an illness.**

Yes, he knows she has Leukemia. (Even before she told him.) _BUT_ he wanted her to admit it. It would have been creepy if he knew all of a sudden. She would not have trusted him. He is attracted to her, and feels a strange sort of connection towards her that he cannot explain. He has an overpowering drive to protect her and keep her safe.

**Yes, he is now watching her sleep. He is trying to figure her out. He can't read her mind, which frustrates the hell out of him. He is starting to develop feelings for her, and it is overwhelming. These feelings are foreign to him; all he knows for sure is that he wants to be around her as much as possible. He wants to help her, look after her—he is drawn to her in a way he never felt before. She makes him happy in a way he never thought possible. He gets anxious when he is not near her, and feelings of jealousy consume him when the boys at school hit on Bella. In short he is basically in love with her, but doesn't quite know it yet.**

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

I moved my doctor's appointment to Saturday. Edward had been diligent about picking me up for school every day this week, but I didn't want him to take me to the hospital and wait around for me.

I flipped through a few magazines as I waited to be called. I hated to admit it, but I missed Edward. Part of me wished I hadn't changed my appointment so he could have taken me.

"Miss Swan the doctor will see you now."

I followed the nurse into his office and sat down. To my surprise he was already sitting behind his desk waiting for me.

"Hi." I smiled.

"Hello, and how are you doing today?"

"Fine."

He smiled, but his eyes were tense. He directed me to an examination table where he preformed my check up. To my relief I had gained one pound. There would be no need to do further testing.

I hopped down from the table once he was done and took my seat again expecting to be excused for a few weeks.

I was wrong.

He looked down at my records for a short moment before he looked back up at me. There was concern deep in his eyes and I began to worry.

"Isabella." He began. "We got your results back from the tests we ran a few weeks ago."

"And?" I prodded anxiously.

He sighed. "It appears your condition has worsened exponentially." He shook his head. "It is not clear why. I'm afraid the prognosis is not good. If things do not slow down, if you don't start responding to treatment again…there won't have much time left."

I sat frozen in my seat as I took in everything the doctor was telling me. Not only was I dying, but now I was dying faster? Treatment again? How was I supposed to go through that again? What if I still didn't respond?

"How long?" I chocked out after a few minutes of silence.

"There are still many things we can do. I don't want you to lose hope—not yet. I want to try some different medicine on you. You might respond to these new drugs better."

"How long?" I asked again my voice a little stronger.

He sighed. "A few months, six at most."

I nodded. Six months, six months and then I would be dead in the ground. I had already accepted my fate, but that was when I had a year still to live. Somehow having my time cut in half panicked me. There wasn't enough time for me to do everything I needed to do. It wasn't fair dammit! I was too young! It wasn't fair!

"I want to start treatment as soon as possible." Doctor Spencer said pulling me from my thoughts.

"No." I whispered. If I only had six months to live I would not spend them sick in bed.

"Miss Swan, think about it. It's the best chance you have. Get back to me next week when you've had a chance to discuss things with your family more."

I nodded knowing I would never tell anyone. There was no need to worry them needlessly. This was my burden to bear. I needed to be strong for them.

Wordlessly, I got up from my seat and walked out of his office, not bothering to set up my next appointment. Somehow I managed to make it to my truck and drive home. I was still in a daze as entered my house and walked to my room. I spent hours sitting on my bed staring at the wall. I needed to get a grip on my emotions before Charlie got home. He was off fishing with an old friend of his, Bill Black, and wouldn't be back for a little while yet.

At least I had this weekend to adjust before school on Monday. "No." I whispered as my thoughts turned to the one person I had let in, Edward. How was I going to tell him? Should I even bother? Tears filled my eyes. I was in too deep. I couldn't deny how I felt about him. I was falling in love with him. I knew that for sure. I didn't know what to do. Part of me yearned to call him and have him comfort me, to feel his strong stone arms around me. But I knew I couldn't. I had to distance myself from him before things got too bad. It wasn't fair for me to involve him, not that I was truly being fair before, but now that I had only a few months…I couldn't allow him to get attached to me in anyway. I cared for him too much to allow him to be hurt by me, even if it wasn't my fault.

I closed my eyes wiping the silent tears that had fallen down my face, and walked downstairs knowing what I had to do. I picked up the phone and dialed his number. He had given it to me a few days ago for emergencies. Now was as good a time to use it as any. It rang twice before someone answered.

"Cullen residence." A soft angelic voice said.

I paused briefly.

"Hello?"

"H-hi." I stuttered. "Is Edward home?" I asked in a weak voice.

"No." I heard hear her say in an amused tone. "He's off with his brothers this weekend. May I take a message?"

Maybe it would be easier if I didn't talk to him. "Could you tell him Bella called, and I will not be needing a ride on Monday?" I debated briefly. "Could I maybe have his cell number so I can leave him a message?"

"Sure." She quickly raddled off his number and I thanked her before hanging up. She told me he would be out of the area and would not receive my message until Sunday night. That was exactly what I was hopping for.

I dialed his number as I gathered my thoughts. I had to sound convincing. I swallowed hard as I heard the beep and took a deep breath. "Edward. This is Bella. I just wanted to tell you that I don't want to be friends anymore. Please leave me alone. Don't call, or come over again. I am sorry for misleading you in anyway, but it's just better this way. I'm not a good friend for you. Please try to understand and respect my wishes. Goodbye."

I fell to the floor as my breathing increased. Pain I had never experienced before cursed through my body. I had begun to heave great sobs without realizing it. I pulled my knees to my chest and rocked slowly back and forth.

I had been so selfish. I had only been focusing on my needs when it came to Edward. I had needed someone to talk to. I had needed a shoulder to cry on. I had needed to be near him--but no more. I swallowed hard chocking back my tears. I was going to go back to my original plan. I was going to keep to myself, and live my life out quietly involving as few people as possible.

I took a few deep breaths trying to hold back the tears. Normal, I had to act normal at least until tonight. I couldn't afford to break down now, I didn't know if I would be able to stop if I started again.

I slowly got up from the floor and opened the refrigerator. It was time to start supper for Charlie.

"Hey Bells." I heard Charlie call from the front door just as I was putting the finishing touches on supper.

"Hey dad." I replied trying to remain upbeat.

"How was the doctors appointment?"

I shrugged. There was no need to tell him it would only cause him more pain and worry. "Same old, same old. Nothing new to report."

He nodded as he made his way into the living room to check on a game that was playing.

We ate in silence. I wasn't the best actress and Charlie noticed something was bothering me. He tried asking me what was wrong, but I lied saying I was only tired. I excused myself as soon as I could and went to my room not bothering to shower. I collapsed on my bed as I let the misery I had been pushing away all afternoon consume me.

It wasn't fair! It just wasn't fair! I covered my face with my hands as my body shook with my sobs. Why me? What had I done that was so terrible? Why was I being punished so harshly?

I cried myself to sleep that night. The next morning my eyes were heavy and dry from all my tears. I laid in bed until late afternoon trying to figure out what I should do.

I was spiraling into a black pit of despair and I didn't know how to escape. I had been through this before, but it was different now knowing my time had been cut in half. Knowing I finally had a reason to live, not that I didn't want to before. My life in Phoenix was happy, but could be lonely at times. Never before had I felt so connected to someone. I had always been sort of an outsider. My 'friends' had all but abandoned me once they found out I was sick. I had only my mother. Even then I refused to share my true feelings with her for fear of hurting her or making her worry.

Only with Edward did I truly feel I could be me. He made me feel completely safe. I felt as though I could confide in him my deepest of fears and he would still be there no matter what.

More than anything I felt guilty. Guilty, that I had allowed him to get close to me and become my friend. I was incredibly selfish. I took comfort in knowing that at least I had ended it. We had only been friends for a few weeks, it's not like we were best friends or anything. I'm sure he thought I was some sort of freak for leaving him that message and calling his house. I hoped he did, then he would leave me alone and I wouldn't hurt him.

I was positive my feelings were deeper for him than his for me. I was just some girl who seemed weak he felt obligated to help. I would always cherish the kindness he showed me. He had made me feel like a real person for the first time in a very long time.

I looked out my window and noticed the sun setting. I dreaded school on Monday when I would have to face Edward again. I didn't know what kind of reception I would get. Would be ignore me, treat me like a leaper again?

A solitary tear slid down my face as I said my final goodbye to the one boy I ever really cared about.


	10. Chapter 10

All Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

Edward had not called Sunday night. It seemed as though he was going to respect my wishes after all. As I left my house Monday morning he was no where to be seen.

I prolonged getting to school as long as I could. I had successfully dodged Edward all weekend and hoped to avoid him this morning as well. As I pulled into a parking space my eyes automatically fell upon his silver Volvo, and there he was leaning against the door with his arms crossed across his chest. He was already looking my way, as if he had been waiting for me to arrive. His angelic face was blank and he appeared calm.

I averted my gaze from his taking a few deep breaths. "You made the right decision." I whispered to myself as I grabbed my bag next to me. I carefully kept my eyes away as I hurried to my first class. The bell would be ringing any second and I didn't want to be late. As I walked across the yard I could feel his eyes on me. It took everything I had not to look back.

The morning passed by all too quickly. Before I knew it I was in class with Jessica as she rambled on about some up and coming dance. It was girls' choice and she couldn't seem to figure out who she was going to ask.

"Um, Bella?" She asked turning a light shade of pink.

"Yeah?"

"Were you planning on asking Mike? I mean I was just wondering…if you're not…I was thinking…of asking him."

"I'm not going Jess." I hated dancing, I had two left feet. I could barely walk across a flat floor without tripping; dancing was an extreme sport for me.

"Why not?" She asked confused.

"It's not my thing. You should ask Mike though. You two will have a great time together." I smiled trying to appear cheerful.

She frowned. "Isn't there anyone you want to ask?"

"No." I replied automatically.

She grinned. "Not even Edward?"

I sighed sharply. "Edward and I aren't even friends anymore. You go Jess. Ask Mike and have fun." I smiled hoping the subject was now closed.

"What happened?" She sounded confused and her eyes were deeply curious.

"Nothing."

She got a knowing look in her eyes and smiled apologetically. "It's ok Bella. You're not the first girl Edward Cullen has turned down."

I turned away grimacing. Her words sounded anything but sincere. She almost sounded happy that Edward didn't appear interested in me anymore. I silently wondered if he had shot her down.

Just then the teacher walked in saving me from Jessica's fake condolences. I rolled my eyes as I turned back to look at the teacher. She couldn't be farther from the truth, but I was not going to correct her. She could think what she wanted. It made my life easier.

As the bell rang signaling lunch I slowly gathered my things not sure of what I was going to do. I didn't want to go to lunch. It would be harder for me to avoid Edward there. I decided to go to my truck and wait it out. I could listen to music and rest until biology. If I planned things just right I could get to class just as the bell rang, leaving no time to talk before.

I felt like a coward, avoiding him like this. I just didn't know if I would be able to refuse him to his face. I had a plan. I needed to stick to my plan.

I said a quick goodbye to Jess claiming I forgot something in my truck, and made my way to the parking lot. I slipped inside my truck and turned it on to get the heater running. It was cold and damp. I could feel myself shivering as the heater warmed up. I used my bag as a pillow lying down across the seat.

It was getting warmer, and my body started to relax. I closed my eyes as I waited for time to slip by.

Minutes later a soft tapping against my driver's side window jolted me upright. My eyes were wide with surprise as I looked to see who was there.

My throat felt tight and I tried to swallow. Edward stood on the other side of my door. He was not smiling, but he didn't look upset only concerned. I leaned over and unrolled my window half way.

"Why aren't you at lunch?" He demanded.

I shrugged. "Not hungry." I started rolling my window back up, but he placed his hand in the way stopping me.

"I wanted to talk to you." He muttered softly. His beautiful golden eyes pleaded with me.

Our eyes held for an immeasurable amount of time. I wanted to look away, I tried to look away, but the intensity of his stare held me strong. As my breathing became more ragged he finally broke the contact and looked away.

I gasped for air trying to regulate my breathing again.

"Talk to me Bella. Tell me what you're thinking. Please?" He whispered softly once my breathing was normal again.

I could feel myself on the edge of my control. I closed my eyes trying to keep the burning tears from spilling over.

"I can't." I finally managed to choke out. "I just can't. Please leave me alone." I felt the tears slid silently down my face. I turned away to hide myself from him. I didn't want him to see my cry.

It was quiet for a long time before he finally spoke. "As you wish." He mumbled just above a whisper. I wasn't sure I heard him correctly, but when I turned back towards where he was standing he was gone.

The tears continued to flow down my cheeks like a small river as I leaned over and rolled my window back up. It was done. Edward Cullen was officially out of my life.

Edward was true to his word. He had not spoken to me, or even looked my way since Monday. It was as if I didn't exist. Though, it was what I wanted, it still hurt. I was always acutely aware of him whenever he was around, but I tried hard to hide it.

Mike seemed pleased with the new distance between Edward and me taking full advantage of it. He hovered around me constantly. It was getting annoying. It was now Friday of the following week. Almost two weeks since Edward and I had talked.

I couldn't wait for the weekend so that I would be free from Mike for a few days. He seemed particularly nervous today for some strange reason as he leaned against my lab table before biology. It made me uneasy.

"Do you have plans Saturday?" Mike finally asked after a few minutes of small talk.

"I'm not sure. Why?" I questioned trying to be nice.

"Well there's this dance, and well I didn't know if maybe you wanted to…ask me to go?" He added looking down.

Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Edward tilt his head towards us ever so slightly as if awaiting my response.

I sighed inwardly. I had completely forgotten about the dance. How was I going to get out of this without seeming rude and hurting his feelings?

"I'm not going Mike sorry."

"Why not? Do you have other plans?" He glanced quickly towards Edward then back at me. I blushed slightly at his implication. No, I had no plans with Edward, nor would I ever again.

"No." I insisted. "I'm not feeling well. I plan to rest this weekend." It wasn't a complete lie I was tired. I had been feeling achy and weak, especially today. Rest was exactly what my body needed.

"Feel better Bella." Mike said as he walked away dejectedly.

I closed my eyes rubbing my temples with my index fingers. My head hurt. I felt bad for upsetting Mike. He was really a nice guy, but he needed to learn now that there was no way we were ever going to date.

I opened my eyes again and noticed the teacher wheeling in a TV. Most students cheered quietly at having a movie day. I rested my head on my arms that were on the table in front of me to watch the film.

As soon as the lights went out I became hyper aware of Edward sitting next to me. I glanced his way and noticed him staring at me intently. His eyes roamed over my face and he furrowed his eyebrows.

I turned my head back to the TV and tried to forget who was sitting next to me, to no avail. It took everything I had inside me to keep my focus away from him. I was thankful when the lights were turned back on and the movie was stopped.

I lifted my head from the table and felt a rush of dizziness flow through me. I held onto the edge of the table firmly closing my eyes as the bell rang. I clenched my jaw as I stood slowly trying to shake the feeling.

"Are you alright?" I heard Edward ask. His voice was thick with alarm.

I looked around waiting for everyone to leave before I answered. I shook my head slowly back and forth. "I don't feel so good." I qualified in a soft voice.

He was instantly at my side with his strong hands wrapped around my waist. I leaned into him closing my eyes. Why wasn't this passing? What was wrong with me? My mind went back to the last time this happened to me, and I tried to remember the last time I ate. With everything going on I hadn't been very hungry. I hadn't really eaten in a long time. I cursed myself silently for being so oblivious to my needs. I needed to be more careful.

I looked up at Edward and could see the fear on his face. "I need to go to the hospital."

He nodded once. "Can you walk?"

'No.' I thought mentally, but I didn't want anyone to see him carrying me. "Yes. I should be fine."

He led me slowly to his car and helped me in. I leaned back against the seat willing myself to feel better. It did not take long before we were pulling up to the emergency entrance of the hospital. Edward came to my side of the car and lifted me into his strong arms without asking. My body instinctively curled into him as he swiftly brought me to Doctor Spencer's office. He informed the receptionist of my situation and she immediately got the doctor. Before I knew it I was in a hospital bed hooked up to an IV drip.

Edward had not left my side once. I tried sending him away but he out right refused to leave me. He was being extremely stubborn.

I forced him to leave when the doctor came back in to check on me. I got lectured again about taking care of myself and eating properly. I apologized and promised to do better. He once again urged me to seek treatment, but I refused. It just wasn't worth it. I was not going to get my hopes up and go through that again only to have it fail. He was going to keep me over night. I tired to protest but he insisted. I sighed inwardly; there was no way to keep this from Charlie now.

I fell into a fitful sleep soon after the doctor left. I awoke not feeling rested at all and looked casually around my room. It was dark outside. I must have slept longer than I thought.

I stifled a yawn as I sat up in my bed noticing food on my bedside tray. I reached over to swivel the tray in front of me and gasped. Someone was in my room sitting in the corner chair. They were hidden in the shadows and I couldn't seem to make out their face.

"Hello?" I asked apprehensively.

I watched as the person stirred and got up slowly. As soon as they entered the light my eyes widened in disbelief, before me stood no other than Edward Cullen. He walked silently to the side of my bed and sat down in a chair.

."How are you feeling?" He asked softly.

"Better." I qualified still shocked to see him there.

I stared at him for a brief moment before looking down self-consciously. "Thanks for your help. I mean you didn't have to after everything…" I trailed off feeling guilty for how I had treated him.

"Yes, I did. There is no need to thank me"

I paused before asking my next question. I didn't know how to say it without sounding rude. "Edward, how long have you been here?"

"Since I brought you in." He answered matter-of-factly.

I looked up at him with my mouth open. "Why?" I breathed stunned. He must have been waiting hours!

He reached out and gently grabbed one of my hands holding it securely in his. "I wanted to make sure you were alright." He muttered softly looking down at our hands.

I swallowed hard as tears formed in my eyes. "I'm fine thank you. You can go now—you don't have to stay."

His head snapped up and he looked deep into my eyes. "I want to." He uttered sternly.

Before I could respond he turned his attention to the tray of food at my side. "You need to eat."

He finished bringing the tray to rest in front of me and un-wrapped my utensils handing them to me.

I took them from him silently and began to eat the food in front of me not noticing what I was eating. I kept my eyes on my tray afraid to meet his gaze. As soon as I was done he removed my tray and again took my hand in his rubbing small circles with his thumb into the back of my hand.

Why was he being so nice to me after everything I said to him? He said he wanted to stay—why? He knew by now that I was ok—it was late didn't he need to get home? All I wanted to do was have him hold me, and make me feel safe again but I resisted the urge. It hurt to be so close to him yet so far away.

I tried to keep my face hidden from him behind my hair, but trader tears slid down my face revealing my emotions. Wordlessly, he reached out with his free hand and tucked my hair behind my ear. He smiled warmly as he wiped my tears away with his fingers.

Holding my gaze he got up from his chair and sat down next to me on the bed and pulled me to his chest. I remained stiff at first, but soon relaxed against him giving into my selfish desires. I cried for a long time and he simply held me close rubbing my back. Soon my cries turned to sniffles as my eye lids became too heavy for me to keep open.

That night I fell asleep in Edward's arms and felt a peace come over me I had never experienced before.


	11. Chapter 11

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

My room was unusually bright the next day as I opened my eyes. To my delight it was sunny outside. I smiled as I looked around the room half expecting to find Edward there. I glanced over towards the chair he had been in last night and noticed one single red rose on my tray with a small folded piece of paper under it. Hesitantly, I reached out to take the rose and brought it to my nose. It smelt very sweet. I smiled as I read the note underneath.

_Bella,_

_I hope you slept well. I am sorry I could not be there for you when you woke this morning. I am but a phone call away. If you need anything, anything at all, do not hesitate to call. I'll check on you later. _

_Be safe,_

Edward 

Underneath his name I found his cell phone number. I read the note several times tracing his elegant letters with my fingers. I smiled; there was no deterring him. It appeared as though I was stuck with him whether I liked it or not. No matter how much I pushed him away he seemed determined to be in my life. Though I knew it was selfish, I was extremely thankful for his tenacity. My heart fluttered at the prospect of seeing him again later today and I suddenly became very anxious to leave.

I was grateful when Charlie finally showed up checking me out. It was practically noon by the time I got home. I was unable to escape another lecture from my doctor about taking care of myself. Charlie had chimed in every now and again. I was pleased that my doctor hadn't brought up treatment. I didn't want Charlie to find out.

Once we got home Charlie refused to go into work.

"I'm staying and making sure you follow doctor's orders." He insisted sternly.

I sighed exasperated.

"What do you want for lunch?" He asked undeterred.

I shrugged. "A sandwich is fine. I can make my own." I added walking to the refrigerator.

Charlie intercepted me pushing me gently towards the living room. "You go sit down and rest. I think I can handle making a sandwich."

I sat down on the couch and together Charlie and I watched TV for most of the afternoon. As evening neared I became unreasonably anxious wondering when, or if, Edward was going to call. I caught myself looking at the clock more often than I should.

I jumped slightly when I heard someone knock at he door. I smiled inwardly hoping it was Edward.

"I'll get it." I said to Charlie who was engrossed with the game on TV. I wasn't even sure he had heard the knock at all.

I bit my lip as I swung the door open, and then my heart fell as I took in who stood before me. Billy Black and his some young boy were waiting patiently on the doorstep. I only knew him from pictures, and I didn't recognize the young man who stood behind him.

"Hello." I smiled.

"You must be Bella. I don't suppose you remember me? I am an old friend of your father's, Billy Black. And this," he said gesturing behind him, "is my youngest son, Jacob."

I nodded politely to Jacob and looked back to Billy. "I remember you from pictures I've seen."

The old man chuckled.

"Please come in."

I stood aside as Jacob wheeled his father through the entry way and into the living room. I smiled as I heard the two old friends greet one another happily. I was glad Charlie had such a good friend.

We all settled into the living room just as the big game was starting on TV. A few minutes in I excused myself to order dinner. I didn't like sports, and was not interested in watching the events unfold on TV. I decided to leave the men to their game and do my homework at the kitchen table. I was surprised when Billy's son Jacob followed me out.

"I'm just doing homework." I warned as he sat down at the table across from me.

"Anything is more interesting than being with those two during a game." He smiled.

I smiled in return.

I marveled at how easy it was to talk with Jacob. I hardly knew him yet it seemed as though we were old friends. The conversation flowed easily as we sat and talked together, stopping only when the pizza arrived. I learned that he was from La Push and had two older twin sisters that I had played with during my summer visits with Charlie. I was shocked to learn that one of them was getting married.

I discovered that he was quite the mechanic. In fact my truck had once belonged to his father.

"So you actually like that old thing?" He asked skeptically.

I scowled. "I love _my_ truck."

"I should be thanking you for taking it off my hands, now I get to work on my car." He admitted with a toothy grin.

"What car?"

"I'm building a car from scratch. It's still got a long way to go, but it's getting there." He announced proudly.

"Wow."

He chuckled at my expression. Just then the phone rang and I reached over to get it.

"Hello?"

"Bella?" An involuntary smile spread across my lips and I could feel the blood rush to my face.

"Hey." I breathed happily.

"How are you doing this evening?" I could hear the tension in his voice.

"I'm well. Charlie forced a sandwich on me this afternoon and I just had two pieces of pizza." I admitted proudly. I looked over at Jacob and he seemed confused. I smiled slightly, turning my back to him.

"Thank you," I whispered sincerely, "for the flower…and…well…everything."

"I'm glad you liked it." I could hear the smile in his voice.

"Will I see you later?" I asked trying to keep my voice even.

"I'm actually not in Forks right now." He admitted. "I'm out with my brother camping this weekend."

"Oh." I tried to keep the disappointment out of my voice, but didn't succeed.

"Sorry. It couldn't be avoided. I committed a while ago…"

"No, no. It's fine. I'm fine. I'll see you when you get back. No worries." I muttered cutting him off. He didn't owe me anything. He shouldn't feel bad for having a life.

"Definitely." He confirmed with conviction making my heart flutter.

"Have fun."

He chuckled. "I will. Call if you need something, even if it's just to talk." He paused briefly before adding. "Please try to take care of yourself while I'm gone."

"Not you too." I groaned before sighing. "I will."

"Promise me." He demanded.

"I promise." I said annoyingly.

I heard him chuckle. I sighed. "See you soon."

"Bye." I whispered and then he was gone. I turned back to Jacob after I had hung up the phone. He was looking down at the table frowning.

"Jacob?" I asked wondering what was wrong.

"Was that your boyfriend?" He asked sadly.

"No." I answered honestly blushing a soft pink. "Just a very good friend."

"Oh. I know just about everybody around here. Who is it?" He asked noticeably chipper.

I paused before answering. "Edward Cullen."

He chuckled. I furrowed my brows in confusion. What was so funny?

He grinned widely at my expression. "That just explains a lot. Why my dad insisted on coming here tonight."

"What do you mean?"

He leaned forward and whispered with a mischievous glint in his eye. "Do you like scary stories Bella?"

"I guess."

He peered into the living room and checked in on our father's before he came back to the table to sit down. "It's part of my tribe's legends. I shouldn't be telling you, but it's all a bunch of stupid superstitions anyway."

"Tell me what Jacob?" I was so confused.

He grinned. "About the cold ones."

Jacob began to spin a tale too incredible to be true—a tale of werewolves and vampires—with the Cullen, and Black family at the center of it all. He explained that he was from a tribe of werewolves sworn to protect humans from the vampires. He claimed that the Cullen's were vampires, but were not supposed to be dangerous because they drank only animal blood. There was a supposed treaty in place. Protecting both Jacob's tribe and the Cullen's from war between their kinds.

So many things began to click into place as he explained further. The iciness of Edward's skin, how hard and incredible strong he seemed to be. The way he seemed to always be in the right place at the right time. The in human beauty he and his family all possessed. I always suspected there was something not right about him and his family, but I never expected this.

My face paled and my eyes widened as he concluded his story convinced he had successfully scared me. That was just it though I wasn't scared. I was shocked, but I couldn't make myself feel any fear. If he had wanted to harm me he would have done it by now. In fact he seemed overly cautious, worrying constantly about my safety. I wasn't completely convinced the story was accurate, but so many things seemed to fit. I was determined to find out the truth.

Jacob's father believed in the legends, and was here to make sure I was ok. He must have learned from Charlie that Edward and I were friends, and was scared for my safety. I was thankful he was preoccupied with the game to grill me on the subject. I just worried about what he might say to Charlie.

Jacob comforted me when he told me that Charlie liked the Cullen's, and thought his father was a fool for distrusting them. At least Charlie wouldn't believe anything Billy had to say.

"I need to get to bed Jacob." I said after a few minutes. It was clear from the circles under my eyes that I wasn't lying. "It's been a long day and I'm really tired. It's been nice talking to you." I smiled.

He grinned. "Yeah it has." He blushed a little. "I'll see you around Bella."

I said a quick good night to Billy and Charlie before I went upstairs to bed not bothering with a shower. I had a lot to consider and figure out, and I needed time alone to think things through.


	12. Chapter 12

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I woke up twice in the middle of the night covered in sweet from nightmares, well the same one really. My dreams were so vivid; each time I awoke it took me a while to realize where I was and to calm down.

I was in the middle of the forest at night running. I wasn't sure what I was running from but once I broke through the tree line I noticed I was in a meadow of sorts. It was quite beautiful and it had turned to afternoon. The sun was shinning and I watched as the grass flowed like waves in the breeze. My head turned abruptly to my left as I heard a fierce howl. There stood a very large wolf. It was so large it almost looked like a bear.

Slowly, I backed away trembling as its growls grew in intensity. I felt myself hit something hard and turned to see Edward standing behind me. His face looked ferocious, and I gasped at the sight. He laid a hand on my shoulder to steady me. "Get back in the forest Bella." He had commanded in a low stern voice.

I heard an earth-shattering howl come from behind me and knew it had come from the wolf. I trembled keeping my eyes on Edward. His eyes narrowed murderously. I should have been afraid, but oddly I felt comforted that he was there. I stepped back into the tree line as directed and ran. Soon I heard loud snapping and growling. I feared for Edward and ran back to the meadow but got lost. I could hear fighting but I couldn't find him. I cried out to him, but there was no answer. I searched and searched to no avail.

That's where I always woke up. I was not willing to risk having the nightmare again and decided to stay up for the day. It was a little past five in the morning, but I could always nap later if I got tired.

I grabbed my bag of toiletries and walked down the hall to the bathroom. I took a quick look at myself in the mirror. I was a complete mess. My hair was slightly matted from tossing and turning, and you could still see a cool sheen of sweat on my forehead.

I shook my head in disapproval turning to get into the shower. The hot water felt good and soothed me. I was reluctant to get out, but the water was staring to get cold so I had no choice. I decided to wear sweats since I wasn't going anywhere. It was sunny again today, but there was a nip in the air.

I carefully made my way downstairs to find that Charlie was already gone. He was out fishing with Billy. He left a number where he could be reached if I needed anything.

I ate some cereal as I contemplated all that I had learned last night, trying to shake the feelings of unease that still surrounded me.

I wondered idly if I should call him. But what would I say? 'Hey Edward so I heard you might be a mythical creature, what do you have to say for yourself?' Part of me felt like a fool for even entertaining such thoughts. There was no such thing as vampires or werewolves. I knew that to be true, but something inside of me begged me to believe. Edward was something that was clear, but what? He was too perfect to be human, but a vampire, and a moral one at that?

I exhaled sharply in aggravation. I needed to get out. I decided to go for a short walk and enjoy the sunshine while I could. My truck was still at the school so I couldn't go far. I would have to stick to the forest surrounding the house.

I grabbed my jacket just in case it started to rain and put my shoes on. I easily found a trail near the back of the house and decided to follow it for a little while.

My mind raced as I walked deeper into the canopy of trees. I searched for proof that he was anything but human, no matter how small, something I might have over looked. He had never eaten in front of me, in fact I had never seen him or his siblings eat at all. They could just not like the food in the cafeteria, but they always purchased full trays of food that remained untouched. There was something in the way they moved. I never really focused on it before, but now that I thought back--it was like their beauty--too perfect to be true. They were so graceful in their movements they put ballerinas to shame. All of their voices seemed so smooth like honey and attractive, seductive in a way.

I shook my head, but what did all this prove?

My head started to hurt as it swarmed with questions. If Edward was a vampire was I willing to accept that? What should I do? Whether Jacob's story was true or not, Edward was something other than human, he was something more, that I knew for a fact.

I had only two options. I could stay away from him, as I knew I should. Go back to ignoring him but for good this time. The mere though caused my heart to sink and I quickly moved onto my next option. Or, I could remain his friend, and accept him no matter what.

He had proved time and time again that he was not out to hurt me. He had insisted I take care of myself until his return just last night. If he truly was a threat to me he would have done something by now. He was willing to accept me despite my condition, and I decided to accept him no matter what he turned out to be. I was simply in too deep. I needed him too much to turn my back on him now. I had already tried to expel him from my life; I wasn't willing to go through that again, not while he still wanted me in his.

I felt a sense of relief as I finally came to a decision. Good or bad, I knew what I was going to do. I smiled as I finally stopped to look around at my surroundings. I had been so lost in thought I had not realized how far I had traveled. I was deep in the forest at this point. The sky above looked dark, but I wasn't sure what time of day it was, the tree cover was very thick.

I swallowed hard as the feelings I had during my dream resurfaced. Fear gripped me as I turned to look for the trail, but it was gone. I must have veered from it without realizing.

My breathing increased as panic set in. I tried re-tracing my steps, but still there was no trail. How long had I been gone? What time was it now? I willed myself to walk faster as I searched frantically for any sign of a way out.

My legs began to ache as I pushed them further and harder. I had left without taking my pain medication, and I was feeling it now. Without warning I tripped over a root and fell forcefully to the ground. I gasped loudly as I made impact with the hard compacted dirt. Tears welled in my eyes as pain coursed through my body. I curled up into a ball wrapping my arms around my legs willing the pain to subside even for a few seconds.

"Edward." I cried. "Where are you? I need you now. I need you."

I lay on the forest ground for what seemed like forever. I was in too much pain to move again. I would have to wait for someone to find me. My heart sank and tears fell down my face as the realization sunk in; I could be here for days before they figured out where I was. In my haste I had left no note. There was absolutely no one who knew where I was.

It was getting colder and darker as night was falling. I shivered curling into myself further to protect myself from the cold. I tired to stay calm and relax, but I was too worried and the pain was starting to over come me. I tried stretching my legs, but screamed out in agony as I used my joints. I quickly curled them back up to my chest.

"Oh Edward, please find me." I begged in a whisper. I knew he, of all people, would be able to find me no matter what. I knew he was off camping with his family, but he would be home soon right? I had to be positive. As soon as he got home he would find me. I could survive one night in the cold.

I muttered over and over again, "Please find me," as my body quivered against the cold. I heard a sound near by and opened my eyes widely searching through the darkness for the cause. It was too dark to make anything out clearly. My heart pounded frantically in my chest as I hunted in vain.

I screamed out in fear as I saw a figure approach me.

"Bella. Shhh, it's me, Edward. Shhh." He approached me slowly as to not frighten me further.

A sliver of moonlight danced across his face and I instantly relaxed. "Edward?" I whispered.

He nodded as he knelt down next to me taking me effortlessly into his arms. "Ahhh." I cried out in agony as he positioned me against his chest.

"Are you hurt?" He asked freezing instantly. His voice was thick with worry.

I shook my head, 'no,' as I curled myself closer to his body. I wrapped my hands securely around the fabric of his shirt unwilling to let him go. Tears ran down my face and I closed my eyes burying my face in his chest.

He straightened out and began walking at a very fast pace. "I'm taking you to Carlisle." He said after a moment.

I didn't say anything as I clung to him with all the strength I had in me. I opened my eyes just once and noticed we were traveling very fast, too fast. The world was passing by at an alarming rate. It made me dizzy so I closed my eyes again keeping them shut.

After a few short minutes I felt him slow, only because the wind around us ceased. I glanced around and noticed we were at a very large white house. He flew up the front steps with ease and somehow managed to open the door with me still in his arms. The house was very quiet. I closed my eyes again as I felt him climb another set of stairs.

"Carlisle?" I heard him saw in an anxious tone.

"What's wrong Edward?"

"I found her like this in the forest. She must have gotten lost. I don't know how long she was there before I discovered her. She appears to be in pain, but claims she is not hurt."

He was talking so fast I almost didn't catch everything he was saying.

"Set her down on the couch and I'll take a look at her." Carlisle responded calmly.

Edward attempted to set me down on the couch, but I tensed clinging to him tighter. I refused to let go. He sighed, and sat down with me in his lap.

"Bella?" I heard Carlisle ask.

I turned my head to look at him and he smiled.

"You're safe now. Edward found you." He could see the naked fear still in my eyes and tried to calm me.

I nodded slightly, but did not relinquish my hold on Edward.

"Edward says you're in pain. Can you tell me what happened?"

I opened my mouth to talk but no words came out. I closed my mouth and tried again. "I-I got lost." I said in a low hoarse voice.

"Do you know how long you were in the forest before Edward found you?"

"No. I left early in the morning."

I felt a rumbling in Edward's chest and could have sworn I heard him growl. I looked up at him in confusion, but didn't say anything.

"I need to know if you got hurt. Edward said you were in pain."

"I fell, but that's not what's wrong. I forgot to take my pain pills. I have a …condition…and with all the running and then I fell…"

He smiled warmly. "I can help you with that. Would you mind letting go of Edward so that I could exam you quickly to make sure no damage was done?"

I paused briefly not wanting to let go, but eventually nodded my head. I released my hold on his shirt and attempted to slide off his lap, but as soon as I tried to use my legs I called out in pain.

Edward instantly pulled me back to his chest, and I saw Carlisle purse his lips. They exchanged a look that led me to believe they were having some kind of private conversation. Carlisle reached for his medical bag beside the couch and pulled out a small clear bottle with a needle.

I whimpered, and hid my face against Edward's chest. I hated needles. Even after all this time you would think I would be used to them by now, but just the sight of them still bothered me.

"Shhh, relax Bella. You will feel better in a few minutes. I promise." I heard Edward whisper. His lips were mere centimeters from my ear. His cool breath tickled my neck and sent shivers down my spine.

I extended my arm willingly to Carlisle and before I knew it he was done. Within minutes I could feel the pain medicine working as my body began to relax.

"Thank you." I breathed.

I was very tired and could feel my eyes lids getting heavier by the second. The pain medicine only proved to increase my sleepiness.

"Sleep now Bella. You're safe now." I heard Edward whisper as he once again lifted me in his arms. I did not know where he was taking me, nor did I care. I could not deny the security I felt being so close to him, or the relief I felt that he was back with me again.


	13. Chapter 13

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I groaned as I stretched my legs under the covers. I didn't want to wake up. I had slept so well. Edward was there in my dreams rescuing me. Suddenly the events of the previous day flashed back to me. I gasped opening my eyes wide.

I was in my room. How did I get here? The last thing I remembered was a big white house, and Edward carrying me somewhere…

"Good morning."

My head snapped to the foot of my bed where my rocking chair sat. Edward was there staring at me with a slight frown on his face.

"Morning." I whispered feeling confused. I could feel the familiar rush of blood fill my cheeks at the thought of having Edward here in my room. I could only imagine what I looked like.

Sensing my discomfort Edward got up from the rocking chair and walked gracefully to my door. "Get dressed. I'm taking you out to breakfast." He grinned at me before he turned on his heel, leaving me stunned.

I flopped my head back on my pillow. How long had he been here? How had be gotten past Charlie? Where was Charlie, and what about school?

I bit my lip nervously as I decided to comply throwing my quilt off me. I grabbed my bag of toiletries and went to the bathroom.

I groaned upon seeing my reflection in the mirror. Of all the times for Edward to see me in the morning I had to look like this. My hair still had leaves and small twigs in it from the time I spent on the forest floor. My face was tear-stained. I was still in the clothes I was wearing last night and they looked dirty and torn.

My face turned tomato red as I turned on the shower and got in. The water felt good, though I wanted to stay and enjoy it, I didn't want to keep Edward waiting longer than necessary.

As I dried off butterflies assaulted my stomach, as I grew more and more anxious. I dressed quickly in a simple deep blue sweater and comfortable jeans. With one last look in the mirror I sighed, and made my way carefully down the stairs.

I found him sitting patiently at the kitchen table. Upon me entering the room he smiled my favorite crooked smile taking my breath away.

"Shall we?"

I nodded in reply following him out the front door. His Volvo was parked in the driveway and he opened the door for me without a word. I got in and faster than seemed possible he was in his seat next to me.

I didn't know where we were going, but I wasn't too concerned. I had a million questions I needed answered, and one bubbled to my lips before I could stop it.

"How long were you there?"

"There?" He asked cocking his head to the side in confusion.

I blushed. "In my room."

He pursed him lips trying not to smile. "I brought you home last night. Charlie was worried sick about you." His voice had turned disapproving. "You left no note, and he had no idea where you were." He raised an eyebrow at me reproachfully before he continued. "He let me back in this morning before he left for work."

"What about school?" I asked trying to change the subject.

He smirked. "We're sick today. Besides Carlisle wants you to take the next few days easy after last night." His voice sounded stern leaving no room for argument.

I pursed my lips and glanced out the window remaining quiet the rest of the way.

We eventually stopped in front a small restaurant in Port Angeles. He came to my side of the car and opened my door for me offering me his hand. Willingly, I placed my hand in his feeling an instant rush of electricity flow through me. My heart skipped a beat and I could swear I saw a smile spread across his face as if he had heard it.

He walked ahead of me opening the door for me. The restaurant was small, and there weren't many people there.

"A quite table for two." I heard him ask the waitress as soon as she approached. Her eyes widened and roamed over Edward, narrowing as they fell upon me. I looked away feeling utterly inadequate next to Edward and followed her to a table in the far back corner.

"Can I start you off with any drinks?" She asked in a sultry voice. It did not escape my notice that she was only looking at Edward. But he kept his eyes on me seemingly oblivious to her.

"Bella?"

"Orange juice and a water please."

"Same for me." He responded dismissing her.

I opened the menu in front of me and scanned everything briefly. I wasn't really that hungry, but I knew he would force me to eat no matter what.

We remained silent, but I could feel his eyes boring into me. The waitress came back with our drinks moments later.

"Are you ready to order?"

Once again her eyes remained on Edward. She was smiling flirtatiously at him, but he didn't even look up at her. He arched an eyebrow at me expectantly.

"Just french toast for me." I closed my menu and handed it to her. Reluctantly, she turned taking it from me, immediately turning back to Edward.

"And for you?"

"Nothing for me. Thank you." 'Of course', I thought. He looked up at her for the first time to hand her our menus flashing her a dazzling smile. She looked stunned and weakly grabbed the menus from him slowly walking away.

I giggled softly knowing exactly how she felt.

"What's so funny?" His brow was furrowed in confusion.

"Nothing." I blushed.

He clenched his jaw and his eyes narrowed incredulously.

"How was your camping trip?" I asked changing the subject again.

He grinned knowing I was trying to distract him. "It went well."

"How was your weekend?"

I shrugged. I debated briefly as to whether or not I should bring up my visit. I wanted to see how he would react to the name. My curiosity got the best of me. "Some old friend of my dad came over from the reservation with his son, Billy and Jacob Black. Do you know them?"

I watched as he tensed ever so slightly and his eyes narrowed briefly before his face turned carefully blank. "I can't say I do."

I nodded my head once pursing my lips. "They seem to know you." I retorted.

"A lot of people claim to know me Bella. That doesn't mean they do." He sat back and crossed his arms across his chest with a smug expression on his face.

I scowled at him. He was being evasive again. Just then my food arrived. The waitress placed my food in front of me and left without another word. I unrolled my silverware from my napkin and cut a small piece off placing it in my mouth trying to formulate my next question. Edward took the opportunity to change the subject.

"What were you doing in the forest Bella?"

He was staring forcefully into my eyes making it impossible for me to think straight. I blurted out the first thought that crossed my mind. "I was thinking."

He frowned. "In the forest?" He arched an eyebrow at me skeptically and then exhaled sharply. "What were you thinking about?" He sounded unreasonably frustrated.

I felt my face get hot. I couldn't tell him the truth, that I had been contemplating my relationship with him.

"I just had a lot on my mind. That's all. I lost track of where I was going, and wondered off the trail."

He groaned. "Do you have any idea how dangerous you're little walk through the forest was?" He snapped. He sounded angry.

"I was perfectly fine…until I got lost." I added sheepishly.

He looked at me for a brief moment before his face relaxed. "Promise me you will never go into the forest alone again."

"Why?"

He sighed. "Let's just say there are things more dangerous than you could possibly imagine lurking there."

I nodded my head in agreement taken back by his confession. Was he referring to mythical creatures? Could the stories really be true?

It remained quiet for a few minutes as I took a few bites chewing slowly. I took a sip of my orange juice and finally looked up at Edward. His eyes were focused on something over my head and he seemed lost in thought. His eyes snapped back to mine after a few seconds, they held such sadness it made my heart ache. I wanted to reach out and comfort him, but I knew better and kept to myself.

"Bella, may I ask you something?" He seemed weary.

"Ok."

"What happened the weekend I was gone with my brothers?" His voice was very tender and there was a hint of sadness to it.

My face paled and I could feel my heart rate pick up. I hadn't told anyone. I opened my mouth to speak but it suddenly felt very dry. I reached forward and took a sip of water.

"I had a doctor's appointment." I whispered as I looked down at the table in front of me. I felt a wave of nausea hit me and I pushed my half eaten plate of food away from me in disgust.

"What did he say?"

I could feel my eyes fill with hot tears. "I'm getting worse." My breathing increased and I felt a huge lump forming in my throat. A few tears escaped down my cheeks as I looked back up at Edward. His eyes were burning with an emotion I couldn't place. They were very soft and gentle persuading me to continue. I took a deep breath.

"I have only a few months, six at most. I'm just…not ready yet." My voice sounded very weak and was just above a whisper. Though it was hard for me to say, I was surprised how relieved it made me feel to finally share this burden with someone.

"And so you pushed me away." He stated in a caring voice.

I nodded. "It wasn't fair to let you get close. It still isn't fair." I mumbled more to myself than to him.

"Oh, Bella. I wish you had just told me. I would have been there for you. I would have helped you through it. You shouldn't have to go through this alone."

I felt fresh tears spill over and down my face. "Why do you care so much? You hardly know me?"

He was still for a moment then he reached across the table and gently placed his hand to the side of my face. "I know you better than you think. I care about you Bella, more than I should." He admitted stroking my face with his thumb.

Our waitress showed up then and I quickly turned away from her cleaning my face with the back of my sleeve.

"Can I get you anything else? Anything at all?" Again she was only looking at Edward, but he paid her no attention.

"No. Just the check please." I heard Edward say in a gruff tone of voice.

She returned with the check in hand leaving it on the table without a word. Edward pulled a bill out of his pocket and left it on the table offering me his hand as I got up. I took it shyly and together we walked to his car.

I keep my eyes forward as he maneuvered his way through the streets of Port Angeles. He said that he cared for me. What did that mean? Could he possibly be feeling the way I am? Was it possible that he craved my company as I craved his? I had to find out what he was. It was his turn to come clean and be honest and stop being so damn evasive.

"What are you thinking?"

I turned to look at him and noticed he was eyeing me with curious eyes. "I'm trying to figure out what you are." I answered honestly.

I saw his hands tighten on the steering wheel, but his face remained calm. "Are you having any luck with that?"

"I have an idea…something Jacob told me."

"What did Jacob tell you?" There was an edge to his tone of voice that had not been there before. He sounded defensive.

I looked away feeling slightly foolish for even suggesting it.

A few minutes later he broke the silence that had fallen between us. "Is it that bad?" He prodded gently.

I shrugged.

"You can tell me anything."

I took a deep breath and looked down at my hands in my lap fidgeting with my fingers as I spoke. "Jacob told me about an old legend involving…" I paused, how was I to tell him?

"Go on." He urged his voice staying even and controlled.

"About vampires and werewolves." I finished my voice soft and low.

I chanced a look his way and saw that he was gripping the steering wheel too tightly; it looked as though he was about to snap it in half.

"And you immediately thought of me."

"No…He mentioned your family…and his."

"What did you do after you heard his story?"

I looked down again afraid to meet his gaze as I continued with my story. "I needed to think, so I excused myself and went to bed. I had terrible dreams all night. My head was spinning, trying to make sense of it all. I got up early giving up on sleeping. That's when I went for my walk. It was early morning and I needed to clear my head. I didn't know what to do, and I had to make some decisions…" I trailed off in a low whisper.

"What decisions did you have to make?" His tone of voice matched mine.

"I had to decide if what Jacob said was true, and what I was going to do about it." I admitted.

"And what did you decide?"

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly hedging my time even if for a brief moment. "It doesn't matter what you are, vampire or not. I need you too much to be without you." I confessed turning crimson.

"It doesn't matter to you that I am a monster?" He questioned in an angry incredulous tone.

I snapped my head up to look at him almost in shock. It was the first time since we got in the car that either one of us had spoken above a soft murmur.

"No." I admitted after a short moment. "It's too late. If you really wanted to hurt me you would have done it by now. Plus Jacob said you weren't supposed to be dangerous."

"I'm still dangerous Bella. Never forget that." He answered curtly.

I said nothing.

"He honestly told you I wasn't dangerous?" He asked skeptically.

"He said you weren't supposed to be dangerous."

He scoffed.

"Am I right then?" I challenged.

His jaw tensed and his face looked torn. Eventually he gave a short nod and my eyes widened.

"I'm right." I whispered.

He frowned. "You haven't asked the most important question yet."

I wondered what he could mean as I looked around shocked to find that we were already back at my house parked in my driveway. "How did we…"

"There's a lot about me Bella you still don't know." He sighed unhappily staring out the windshield at the sky.

"Will you tell me?" I asked sheepishly.

He turned to look at me, and the look in his eyes took my breath away. The mere intensity was enough to melt steel. I could see the vulnerability, and unease he felt. I knew it was just as hard for him to talk about who he was as it was for me to talk about being sick.

"It's getting cold. Let's go inside." He insisted tearing his eyes from mine.

I readily agreed as question upon question entered my mind. There was so much I wanted answered I wasn't sure which question I should ask first.


	14. Chapter 14

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

A silence fell over us as we settled in the living room. So many questions I wanted to ask him, but he seemed so hesitant to answer I didn't want to push him away. He sat next to me looking down at his intertwined hands that dangled between his legs, unmoving. If I didn't know better I would think he was a statue.

I sighed inching closer to him. Carefully I placed my hand on his back. He flinched away and I dropped my hand instantly.

"How can it not matter to you what I am?" His voice was low and harsh.

I sighed. "You are the first person who ever really noticed me. I don't feel like that poor sick girl around you--I feel like a real person--like Bella. That means more to me than you could possibly imagine."

He sighed raking a hand through his thick bronze hair. He still did not look at me.

"Edward it's hard to explain. I just—I need you." I blushed at my confession, but forced myself to continue. "It doesn't matter to me what you are because for the first time since I got sick I feel alive again, and it's all because of you."

He breathed out slowly shaking his head back and forth.

Fear gripped me as I watched him shaking his head in disapproval. Had my confession upset him? Had I finally pushed him away?

"Bella." He breathed. "Heaven help me, but I need you too."

I reached out again resting my small hand on his broad back. This time he didn't flinch away from my touch.

After a moment of silence he looked up at me with pained eyes. "Aren't you at all concerned about my diet?"

"Well, Jacob said something about that."

"What did Jacob say?" His voice had turned sour.

"He told me you and your family only drink animal blood."

"We're not perfect. Sometimes we make mistakes." He answered almost immediately. His eyes begged me to take him seriously, but still I could not feel afraid.

I didn't say anything. He dropped his head down resting it in his hands.

"So what now?" He asked more to himself than to me, but I took that as my cue to ask some of my many questions.

"I am curious about some things."

He lifted his head to look at me, his lips twitching at the corners as he fought back a smile. "I'll make you a deal. I'll answer your questions if you agree to answer mine."

I bit my lip nervously. What could be possibly want to know? "Question for question?" I asked raising my eyebrows at him.

"Question for question." He echoed agreeing to the condition. "Ladies first." He gestured for me to begin waving his hand towards me.

I bit absently on one of my thumbnails as I considered what I should ask him. "Why do you do it, hunt animals instead of people?"

"I don't _want_ to be a monster." His voice was almost inaudible.

He paused. "When did you first find out you were sick?"

"I was 15. I hadn't been feeling well. It started out as me feeling tired more than usual. The headaches soon followed. Once my joints started bothering me my mother insisted on taking me to the doctors." I chuckled once without humor. "I remember that day so clearly. I can still tell you what his office smelt like, peppermint. That day changed my life forever." My voice trailed off as I stared off into the distance focusing on nothing, remembering every detail.

I felt his cold hand brush lightly against my arm reassuringly bringing me back to reality. I smiled weakly at him, turning a soft shade of pink as my skin tingled in the wake of his touch.

"You're turn." He prodded gently.

I thought for a moment. "Don't laugh, but what about things like the sun, and sleeping in coffins?"

He laughed quietly anyway. "Myth. The sun cannot hurt me, nor do I need to sleep in coffins. But I can't exactly go out in the middle of the daylight, at least not where humans can see me. As for sleep…" He hesitated and an odd tone entered his voice. "I can't sleep."

"At all?"

He smiled. "That's more than one question."

I frowned.

He chuckled then paused. "Never." He replied softly.

Abruptly his features changed and his eyes became mischievous. "Why did you really turn Mike down for the dance?"

Instantly I felt myself turning red. "I really wasn't feeling well." I hedged hoping that would be enough, but knowing it wouldn't be.

"Bella." He eyed me reproachfully.

"Fine." I huffed. "Mike is nice and all, but I just don't like him in that way. Besides. I have a plan." Had a plan I added mentally.

"A plan?" He asked arching one of his eyebrows in confusion.

"That's two questions."

He folded his arms across his chest waiting patiently. He smiled, dazzling me stealing my original argument from my mind.

I sighed. "I don't want to be a burden. I don't want people to see me…at the end. My plan was to start over in a place no one knew me—where no one pitied me. My mother would get the opportunity to travel with her new husband and not spend all her time in hospitals." I shrugged. "It was the best thing I could think to give her—only happy memories of me. I would be able to get to know my father better. It's not entirely fair to him, but it's the best solution I could think of." I paused. "I never planned on getting close to anyone here. I never thought…" I trailed off not wanting to complete my thought.

"Never thought what?" He encouraged me gently.

I shook me head grinning. "My turn."

He scowled. I could have sworn I heard a low growl escape his lips, but I dismissed it deciding to file it away for a later question.

"How do you always seem to know things? You're always there when I need you most, and know things, things no one should know, without anyone saying anything to you."

He looked at me for a long time and I could tell he was having an internal debate about whether or not he was going to tell me. I wanted him to know he could trust me so I reached out and gently squeezed his hand. He searched my face a minute longer deciding.

"There are many things about my kind, I myself, do not understand. For reasons unknown to me, or any of us, many of us possess certain abilities. From the time of my…" He paused struggling for the right words. "new birth I have had the ability to read minds." He stated.

I could feel the blood draining form my face. No.

"Don't worry. I can't read yours." He added hurriedly.

My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "You can't read my mind? Why not? Am I the only one?" I should have felt relived, but for some reason it bothered me more than it should. Was I some kind of freak? Was there something wrong with me?

He looked at me for a moment, his eyes impenetrable. "I'm not sure why. I can only assume that your brain works differently than the others around you. Yes, you are the first person I have ever met that I could not read." He frowned obviously annoyed by that fact.

I carefully contemplated all he had told me. I wondered what abilities his family might possess. If Edward could read minds what could they do? My mind swirled with possibilities as different images filled my brain.

"Now, back to you." He grinned, tearing me from my thoughts. "What had you never thought?" His voice had turned very soft.

I groaned inwardly. Of course he would have to go back to what I had said before. I looked away from him as I gathered my thoughts. How was I to tell him? I swallowed hard and took a deep breath. I could feel him growing impatient as the seconds ticked by.

"I never thought I would feel the way I do when I'm with you." I could feel my cheeks burn at my confession.

He placed one long finger under my chin and raised my head to look at him. His eyes were deeply curious and kind. "How do I make you feel?" He whispered. His cool breath fanned across my face causing my eyes to glaze over. The smell alone was enough to make me faint—so sweet and delicious.

I tried to turn away, but he held me strong. I looked into his eyes for a minute before answering. "Safe, and…" I hesitated. I couldn't tell him. I just couldn't say the words. Each time I tried they caught in my throat.

"Please Bella?" He pleaded. His voice was compelling-too compelling. I was finding it almost impossible to resist.

I opened my mouth to speak just as the phone rang. He dropped his hand from my face freeing me from his hold. I breathed a sigh of relief as I jumped up from the couch to answer the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Bells. I'm just calling to check on you."

"Thanks dad. Everything is great."

"Have you had lunch yet?"

I knew he was just being fatherly and caring, but it was annoying to be checked up on all the time.

"Not yet." I glanced at the clock realizing for the first time how late it was. It was nearly 1:30.

"Don't you think you should?" His voice was disapproving.

"I will right now dad. I promise. Thanks for calling. I will see you tonight."

I sighed hanging up the phone. I turned around to find Edward there. I flinched back slightly, surprised.

He smirked and his eyes danced with humor. "I should get going." He announced.

My brows puckered. I didn't want him to leave yet.

He chuckled. "Charlie is right. You need to eat. You should also get some rest."

How did he know what Charlie said? Is super hearing part of the vampire package as well? I filed the new information away for a later time.

"I'm fine." I replied defiantly crossing my arms across my chest.

His lips twitched at the corners as he tried not to smile. "That may well be, but you still need to eat."

My face fell again at the thought of him leaving so soon. He reached out and ran his fingers along my cheek. My skin tingled and felt very warm.

"I'll be back tomorrow to keep you company. If that's all right." He added. I could see the uncertainty in his eyes. Did he honestly think I wouldn't want to see him?

"Yes, that's fine." I verified as a soft blush spread across my face.

He smiled my favorite crooked smile before turning to leave. Just as he got to the door he turned to look at me. "Sleep well Bella." And then he was gone.


	15. Chapter 15

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

True to his word Edward showed up on my doorstep early the next morning. The night before I had been too wired to sleep well. I tossed and turned as I processed all the information I had learned, anxious to learn more.

His face was blank as I opened the front door greeting him with a wide grin. His eyes roamed across my face and it fell slightly as his eyes lingered on the circles under my eyes.

"You look tired." He reached out and gently traced the darkness under my right eye.

I shrugged. "I couldn't sleep."

"Me either." He smirked, his eyes a light with humor.

I laughed. "I guess I did sleep a little bit more than you."

"Yes, I'd wager you did." He smirked.

I led him down the hall and into the kitchen. I was in the middle of cleaning up from breakfast. I quickly washed and dried my bowl. I turned to find him sitting at the kitchen table staring out the window deep in thought. As soon as I sat down he turned to me. His eyes were ambivalent.

"What did you want to do today?"

"Nothing. You need to rest." He answered sternly.

"I'm not that tired." I argued.

He pursed his lips calculating. His eyes drifted to my beat up old copy of, _Jane Austin Seven Novels_, I had been reading that I left on the table, then back to me. "I'm willing to compromise."

I sat back in my chair as I waited for his offer.

"You take it easy for the rest of today and this weekend we'll plan a trip to Seattle. They have some really great book stores there."

I bit my lip as I considered his idea. There was no better way I would want to spend a Saturday than with Edward, but I didn't want to give in quite yet.

"What will we do today then?"

He grinned. Behind his back he pulled a small stack of paper. Upon closer inspection I saw that it was work from school. I frowned.

"You need to keep up with your studies Bella." He stated firmly.

I looked down. "It doesn't really matter anyway." I mumbled so low I was sure he couldn't hear me.

"Of course it matters." He snapped furiously. I looked up at him with wide eyes that filled with tears, and I flinched back at the livid expression on his face.

Upon taking in my expression he lowered his head and pinched the bridge of his nose between his forefinger and thumb. It was quiet for a moment.

"I'm sorry for snapping at you like that Bella. Please forgive me." His voice sounded strained.

I nodded my head, unable to form words just yet.

"Why do you insist on talking that way?" He challenged. Though he was trying to hide it, I could still see the anger in his eyes.

"Because it _doesn't_ matter. In a few short months I won't be here. I'm dying Edward. And no matter how much I wish otherwise it's still true."

"So you're just giving up?" He demanded.

"No." I shot back harshly. I took a deep breath to calm myself. I didn't want to be harsh with him. I could feel the tears burn behind my eyes and I tried my best to hold them back. I shifted my gaze to the table. "I've come to accept my fate. It was hard at first. I was angry just as you are now, but it doesn't change anything. Angry or not, I'm still dying. Don't you think I know how unfair this all is?" I questioned as my voice grew in volume. "I'm only 17, and my life is being stolen from me. But there's not one damn thing I can do about it. So forgive me if it appears I've given up. I'm doing the best I can." My voice had turned bitter at the end, though I tried to keep it even throughout my little rant. I wiped my face with my fingers willing the tears to stop.

"I'm sorry Bella. I shouldn't have assumed. That was inexcusable of me to do so." Each word rang with sincerity it was hard not to believe him.

I looked up and caught his regretful eyes. I smiled weakly. "It's ok."

He smiled warmly at me causing me to melt inside. "If you don't want to do school work today then what would you like to do?"

I paused before answering taking a few deep breaths to compose myself.

"I'm willing to take you up on your offer. We could just sit and talk some more. And I promise to do my homework later tonight. Thank you for getting my assignments for me, that was very thoughtful of you."

He smiled sheepishly, and then the onslaught of questions began. This time he was careful to stay away from any questions dealing with my illness. He focused on things almost trivial in nature, others so thought provoking I wasn't sure how to answer.

"What kind of boys did you date in Phoenix?"

I was taken back by his question and swiftly turned a deep shade of red. His questions were so random in nature; I never knew what to expect, and I certainly did not expect this question.

"I didn't." I answered honestly.

He looked surprised. "You never dated?" He asked incredulously.

I shook my head. "Never."

"Why not?" He asked his were deeply curious.

"Nobody ever asked me."

Again a look of surprise crossed his features. "You never met anyone you wanted?"

My blush intensified, and I looked away, deciding to answer as honestly as I could. "Not in Phoenix."

He stopped short contemplating my answer, a small smile spreading across his face before he threw another question my way.

We continued like this for most of the afternoon. I would ask three or four questions then it would be his turn. I held nothing back, and it seemed he was being just as honest with me. It was incredibly nice to be so open and honest with him.

"Why can't you go out in the sun where people can see you?"

He smirked. "I'll show you sometime."

I frowned slightly not wanting to wait, but quickly thought of another question I wanted to ask him.

"Ok, What do you do at night? You can't sleep, so how do you fill your time?"

An emotion crossed his face, but left before I could identify it. I thought it might be embarrassment, but I couldn't be sure.

"I'd rather not say."

I pursed my lips. "I've answered all your questions."

A scheming look entered his eyes, and a small smile played on the corners of his lips. "Not all my questions."

"Yes I have."

"Yesterday you never finished telling me how I make you feel. I'll answer your question if you finish answering mine."

I crossed my arms across my chest scowling at him. A light blush crossed my face. There was no way I was brave enough to tell him how I feel. He had me, and he knew it.

"Fine."

"Fine, you're going to answer, or fine, I don't have to answer." He smirked, his eyes full of humor.

"You don't have to answer." I grumbled.

He smiled crookedly at me instantly melting all my irritation away. "What kind of books do you prefer?

I bit my lip as I considered his question. How was I to answer? I could see him growing impatient, as he always did when I took too long to answer any of his questions.

"I love the classics; anything by Shakespeare, or Jane Austin. I love impossible love stories. I'm not sure why. There is something about the impossibility of it all that gets me. How two people can come together under impossible odds…it's intriguing to me I guess."

He paused considering my answer. "What play do you like most by Shakespeare?"

I shrugged. "I guess I have always loved the story of Romeo and Juliet. Romeo is one of my favorite fictional characters." I admitted shyly, as my face turned a light shade of red.

He made a face. "Romeo? I always found him to be quite…fickle."

I shrugged a little offended. I had always had a little thing for Romeo. "To each her own."

He smiled mockingly at me and I decided to quickly change the subject back to him.

"You don't really go camping when you go away with you family do you?"

"No. We go hunting." He stated offhandedly, his smile still in place, aware of what I was doing.

"Hunting? Like with weapons?" I was confused.

He flashed me a brilliant toothy smile that made me feel uneasy. "Not with any weapons a human would use."

I shiver ran down my spine as what he was saying sunk in. "Oh." I responded lamely.

"Do you have to go often then, hunting I mean?"

He shrugged. "Once every few weeks is usually enough for me. My eyes are usually a tell tale sign of when I need to go."

My eyes widened as something clicked within my head. "I new there was something about your eyes that was different. I just never put it together before."

He smiled reluctantly at my expression. "When I am…well fed my eyes are gold in color. When I am hungry, or rather thirsty, they turn black."

"And the purple under your eyes deepens as well."

"Yes."

I could tell he did not particularly enjoy talking about his eating habits with me, but everything about his life intrigued me and I had to know.

As if on cue my stomach growled signally that it was time for lunch. It had been so long since my stomach had made such noises that it took me off guard and embarrassed me. I blushed as I raised my hand to cover my stomach.

"Sorry. I guess I'm hungry."

He grinned. "I'll leave you to eat."

"You don't have to go." I stated longingly.

He smiled. "I do actually." He winked at me. "I have makeup work to do as well."

I nodded. I walked him to the door and stood in the entrance as he gracefully made his way to his car.

"I'll pick you up for school tomorrow." He smiled.

I nodded waving goodbye before I shut the door. I couldn't seem to erase the goofy smile that was plastered across my face all afternoon away. I did my homework happily humming tunelessly to myself. I even made a really nice meal for dinner. It had been a great day, but I was exhausted. Between no nap, and not sleeping well the night before, I had no problem sleeping.

Almost as soon as my head hit the pillow I was lost to the world around me.


	16. Chapter 16

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

The next few days seemed to race by. It was Friday before I knew it. Edward had picked me up for school every day. It had been wonderful. I was in my last class before lunch with Jessica. She had been quiet all week. I wasn't sure why, and when I asked her what was wrong she would only shrug her shoulders at me. I couldn't imagine what I had done to her to upset her so much.

As the bell rang I quickly gathered my things eager to see Edward again, but was stopped by a soft tap on my back. I turned back around to find Jessica still in her seat with an annoyed look upon her face.

"Yes Jessica?' I asked.

"You didn't have to lie to me Bella."

"What are you talking about?" I furrowed my eyebrows at her.

She flipped her curly hair over her shoulder. "About you and Edward. I mean you could have just told me the truth. It's clear you two are more than just friends." She said in an accusing tone of voice.

"Is this what has been bothering you? You think I lied to you about Edward and me?"

She nodded curtly. "I don't like being lied to. I thought we were friends."

"We are friends Jess. When I told you Edward and I weren't friends we really weren't…but things…changed." I felt my skin getting warmer. I didn't know how to explain my relationship with Edward. I didn't even know what we were.

I sighed. "To be honest Jess I don't really know what we are anymore."

She pursed her lips and I could tell she didn't really believe my explanation. "So you're not dating?" She asked incredulously. "Because it certainly seems that way."

Did it? I didn't think it possible but I could feel my face getting hotter. "No, we're not dating."

She eyed me suspiciously. "So he hasn't asked you out at all?"

I shrugged. "He offered to take me to Seattle to go to some books stores tomorrow, does that count?"

Her eyes lit up as she finally got the information she had been searching for all along. "Yes. When did he ask you?"

"A few days ago."

She frowned. "Weren't you both sick then?"

I bit my lip nervously. I couldn't tell her he had spent all that time with me at my house, alone. I would never hear the end of it. "Yeah…I mean he called to see how I was doing and asked if I wanted to go."

Her eyes widened. "Let me get this straight." She said pointed the palms of her hands out to me. "He called you, when he was sick, to see how you were feeling, and then asked you out?"

I shrugged as I felt the blush on my face spread further down my neck and up to my ears. When she put it that way it did sound like something more than friendship was going on.

She shook her head in disbelief. "And you're not sure what you two are."

I shrugged again biting my lip.

I glanced up at the clock on the wall and noticed that lunch was almost half over. "Jess I think we should go to lunch now or we're going to be late."

"Ok, just tell me one last thing and then we'll go."

I nodded as I waited for her question. I had a sinking feeling I was going to regret this.

"Has he kissed you?"

As soon as her question left her lips I could feel my face ignite again as it turned crimson.

"No."

"Do you want him to?"

I swallowed hard. "That's more than one question." I hedged. "We need to get to lunch."

Her face fell and I could see the disappointment in her eyes. "Yeah, ok."

We walked into the lunchroom together, and my eyes on their own accord, searched the room for Edward. Jessica could see I was distracted and she mumbled a quick goodbye to me as she made her way to the lunch line.

I spotted him in a far corner sitting alone with a tray full of food in front of him. I caught his eye shortly thereafter and he smiled warmly at me. I smiled in return as I made my way to his table.

"I was wondering when you were going to show up? I was about to send out a rescue party for you." He joked.

"I wish you had." I mumbled to myself as I took a bite of the pizza on his tray.

He chuckled with a knowing look in his eye. "So, why were you so late?"

I took a sip of juice to clear my mouth before I answered. "I got stuck talking to Jessica."

"Hmm." He nodded. "How did that go?" His eyes twinkled with mirth.

It hit me just then, he knew. He must have been listening. My face flushed as I narrowed my eyes at him accusingly. "You weren't listening were you?"

"So things have changed between us?" He asked mockingly.

I scowled at him dropping the piece of pizza I had in my hand and got up from the table. I walked away from him without another glance and stormed out of the cafeteria. How dare he use his ability to spy on me? He had no right. More than anything I felt mortified. He had heard and probably seen my every reaction to Jessica's questioning. I just wanted to curl under a rock and disappear.

I stomped into biology and sat with my head down on my desk as I waited for class to begin. I clearly heard when the seat next to me moved, and Edward sit down. I was too miffed to even look at him.

The teacher came in and announced that we would be working on worksheets together with our lab partners. They were to prepare us for the upcoming test. I grabbed one of the worksheets and began filling in the blanks without consulting Edward. He certainly wouldn't need the review. I had learned many things about him in the last few days. Besides having the ability to read minds he had super hearing, speed, and strength. He also had a photographic memory. The last thing he needed was a review.

"Bella." I heard him whisper my name but I kept my eyes on the worksheet. I knew if I looked at him I would loose my resolve, and I really wanted to be mad right now.

He sighed. "Please, won't you look at me? I'm sorry for upsetting you."

His voice pleaded with me to believe him. He sounded so upset and his words were very sincere. I bit my lip deciding. I sighed, I was entirely too weak when it came to him. I rolled my eyes as I turned to look at him.

He smiled warily at me and I couldn't help but smile in return. "Are you still very angry with me?"

"Yes." I tried to sound angry, but couldn't quite manage it.

"I truly am sorry. That was wrong of me to listen in on your private conversation like that. I got worried when I didn't see you right away." He justified.

My determination was all but gone. No matter how much I tried I couldn't feel angry. I sighed heavily. "So how much did you hear anyway?"

He smiled hugely knowing he was off the hook. "Not that much."

"How much is not that much?" I persisted.

He reached out and gently stroked my arm soothingly. "Enough to know that Jessica is a busy body."

I wanted to press further but the teacher approached our table silencing all my questions. I hunched back over my worksheet feigning to work diligently. This was not a conversation I wanted to have in front of all my classmates, so I chose to wait until later to bring it back up.

Edward and I worked on the worksheets together for the rest of class without another word about Jessica and his ease dropping.

Edward walked me to P.E. and said a quick goodbye before looping gracefully off to his last class. I sighed as I gazed after him before turning to take my place on the bleachers.

I was a little surprised to see someone already sitting on the top row smiling at me. I cursed silently in my head as I smiled back ascending the rows to a very happy looking Mike Newton.

I sat in the row in front of him. "Hey Mike. Why aren't you participating in gym today?"

"I am. I just wanted to talk to you really quick before class."

"Oh." I said lamely.

"You never did get back to me about going to First Beach. We plan on going this weekend."

I bit my lip. "Sorry Mike. I kind of already have plans. I'm going out of town this weekend."

His face fell slightly. "Are you going with anyone _special_?" I did not miss his emphasis on the word special, and I knew instantly whom he meant.

"I will be going with a friend." I supplied.

"You're going with Cullen aren't you?" He asked glumly as he looked at his feet.

"I will be going with _Edward_." I answered, stressing Edward's name. For some reason it irritated me that Mike was using Edward's last name to refer to him.

"Have fun." He mumbled as he got up and left to change his clothes for gym.

I sighed covering my face with my hands. At least he finally got the hint that there was no chance for us, though I still felt guilty.

I couldn't wait for class to end. I kept catching Mike sending glum looks my way. It was more than I could handle. I just wanted out. As soon as the bell rang I was up out of my seat and half way out the door before everyone had made it into the locker rooms.

I was shocked to find Edward waiting for me outside the gym doors, though I shouldn't have been. He smiled upon seeing me and all my frustrations melted away as I smiled back. It was almost impossible for me to be anything but happy when around him.

We walked silently to his car and he helped me in. We were the first ones to leave the parking lot. I was in a slight hurry, because I had a doctor's appointment. Doctor Spencer wanted to do a check up on me after Edward's dad told him about my little adventure in the woods. I reluctantly agreed.

"I'll pick you up tomorrow morning." He muttered as I got out of the car.

I smiled euphoric at the idea of spending the entire day with him. "See you then."

I carefully made my way into the house not wanting to trip, and prepared myself to leave for the hospital.

I arrived with about ten minutes to spare. Doctor Spencer's last appointment had been canceled so they took me in right away.

"Miss Swan." Doctor Spencer greeted me as I entered his office.

"Hi."

"I hear you had quite the adventure a few days ago."

I looked down fiddling with my fingers guiltily. "I'm fine now."

"Why don't you let me be the judge of that?" He waved me over to his examination table and proceeded to look me over.

"Have you given any more thought to the treatments we discussed?"

He was persistent if nothing else. I sighed. "Yes, and I will not be taking them."

He frowned slightly. "Are you sure Isabella?" His face was grave. "I must be honest with you, it's you're only chance. It could prolong things, at the very least a few months."

I shook my head. "I've made my decision."

He sighed. "Very well I won't bother you again. If you should change your mind, do not hesitate to call."

"Thanks." I replied sincerely as I got off the table.

"I'm increasing your pain medication. Other than that you are free to go."

I thanked him again and swiftly left his office with my new prescription in hand. Usually I hated all the drugs they put me on, but I was in need of more pain relief and was happy for the new prescription.

I gave a quick goodbye wave to the receptionist as I left the waiting area. I wasn't really paying attention to where I was going and bumped into something very cold and hard. I felt arms wrap around me and steady me. I stiffened as I realized whose arms were around me.

My mind raced with questions. Why was he here? Had he followed me? How long had he been here? Did he hear anything? How much had he heard?

Reluctantly I looked up to meet his gaze and was caught off guard by the anger I saw in his eyes. It was silent between us as we stared at each other. The air grew more uncomfortable as time stretched on.

"Why Bella?" He breathed breaking the thick air that had formed between us. He almost sounded hurt.


	17. Chapter 17

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

"Why what?" I asked innocently.

He narrowed his eyes at me as he dropped his hands from my shoulders. "Why are you refusing treatment?" He growled in a low harsh voice.

I lifted my chin stubbornly. "That's none of your business." I pushed past him heatedly as I made my way for the front exit. I didn't get far before I felt his hand on my shoulder forcing me to stop.

"I think I have a right to know."

I shrugged my shoulder free and continued to walk towards the door as my anger grew. Where did he get off assuming he had rights? It was my life and my decision to make alone. I could feel him close on my heels but I didn't care. It started sprinkling as I reached my truck, but I ignored the rain as I wheeled around to confront him.

"How dare you follow me here, and then ease drop on another one of my conversations. You had no right!" I spat out furiously.

"Answer the question Bella." He said through clenched teeth completely ignoring my accusations.

I stubbornly set my jaw refusing to tell him anything. We stood close to one another staring each other down until the rain picked up. I could feel the rain soaking through my clothing, and I shivered once involuntarily.

Edward was the first to break contact closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose with his forefinger and thumb. I could see him clenching and unclenching his jaw as he tried to calm himself.

He raked his hand roughly through his hair and looked back at me with a pained expression on his face. "I'll take you home." His voice sounded worn.

"I can drive." I whispered as I reached out for the handle of my truck.

I felt Edward's strong hand reach out and cover mine as I gripped the handle to the door. "Please Bella."

I looked up at him with tears in my eyes. "Why?" I breathed.

"Please." He pleaded softly.

I gazed up at him for a long time before I finally agreed to go with him. He took my hand in his and side-by-side we walked to his car. There was a great deal of tension in the car as Edward drove down the street. I kept my eyes down as I played with a strand of my hair. Neither one of us quite knew what to say.

I looked up after a short while expecting to be almost home, but I was surprised to see nothing but open road in front of us.

"Where are you taking me?"

"I want to show you something."

I sighed sitting back in my seat, not knowing what to expect. We traveled for a while longer. I had no idea where we were. Eventually the car stopped at a cliff far out of town. Edward walked around to my side of the car and helped me out. He handed me his jacket and I obediently put it on. It wasn't raining wherever we were, but my clothes were still damp from before.

I followed Edward to a big boulder where he sat down. I sat down next to him as I looked out over a valley. It was so beautiful. I felt as though I could see forever. It was very green and so many trees! I could just barely make out a small clearing off in the distance.

"I come here sometimes times when I'm out driving around to think." Edward said softly. I didn't say anything as I continued to look straight ahead.

After a long silence he sighed. "I didn't follow you today. I was helping Carlisle at the hospital when I heard your voice. I didn't plan on listening in on your appointment, but when I heard him mention treatments I couldn't help myself."

I turned my gaze to look at him as he explained his actions. He was staring off into the distance not really focusing on anything when he abruptly turned to face me. He looked deep into my eyes for a while before he spoke again.

"You asked me what right I had to question your decisions. You told me it was none of my business. But it is my business. I care about you Bella. When I am not with you I grow unbearably anxious. My every thought is of you." He paused briefly taking my hands into his. "You have brought new meaning to my life. My world was completely dark before you. You are my sun, my one point of light and happiness. You are the only thing in my life that truly matters. I love you Bella."

My heart fluttered at his words. He had left me speechless. I blinked once slowly as I tried to let everything he said sink in. He loved me. I looked down at our hands as he waited for me to respond. I could feel the tears building in my eyes as the minutes passed. Never had someone cared so deeply for me. Never had I felt so intensely for another. It was wrong for me to feel this way knowing it would only end in heartbreak. I felt guilty for allowing my feelings to run away from me and for allowing him to get this close to me. But there was nothing I could do about that now. All I could do was love him for as long as I had.

I could sense him growing more anxious as he waited. I looked up at him as silent tears trailed down my face. "I love you too." I breathed.

He smiled and let go of my hands placing them on either side of my face. He cupped my face in his strong hands and gently wiped away my tears with his fingers. My breath caught in my throat as he slowly moved closer to me.

His face was mere inches from mine and he smiled. "That's good to know." And then his lips were on mine, so soft and gentle.

Electricity coursed through my veins as our lips moved together. It was the most amazing feeling I had ever experienced in my entire life. I could feel my face burn as blood rushed to fill my lips and face. My stomach churned as it filled with thousands of little butterflies. I could feel myself growing dizzy, and then he pulled away.

I opened my eyes slowly to see that he was still very close. "Breath Bella." He whispered as his cool breath flowed over my face.

I gasped for air, my eyes wide, as my head cleared. He chuckled as I attempted to calm my breathing. "Wow." I muttered.

He grinned, his eyes full of love. He pulled me to him taking me in his arms. I rested my head against his strong muscular chest and felt at peace. He held me for a long time, neither one of saying anything.

I knew he wanted answers but I didn't know what to say, or how to say it. He deserved to know, he was right it was his business, especially now.

"Have you ever endured treatment for cancer, Edward?" I asked in a hushed tone.

I could feel him stiffen around me and then relax as he answered. "No."

"Have you ever seen someone go through that?"

"No. I haven't."

"I have." I said barely above a whisper as a tear slid down my cheek. This was not easy for me to talk about.

"It's hell." I said through clenched teeth as I tried to control my emotions. "There are times when you are so tired you can't fulfill your basic needs on your own without help. Other times you suffer from insomnia and for days sleep evades you driving you mad. The nausea and vomiting make it almost impossible to eat and before you know it you look like the living dead."

I paused as I gathered my thoughts. "You're so sick, life just isn't worth living. Doctor Spencer wants to try some new treatments on me. He isn't sure they will work. They may give me a few extra months, _if _they work. If they don't work they will make my remaining time left, hell on earth."

I pulled away slightly so that I could look up at him. His face looked pained and his eyes were filled with sadness. "Please try to understand. I can't go through that again without some kind of guarantee."

He placed one hand to the side of my face and stroked my cheek. "Maybe a few extra months are all you need." He said reassuringly.

"Please don't ask me to through that. I can't. I just can't." I openly started to cry and he once again pulled me into his chest. He held me close until all my tears were gone.

"I don't want to lose you Bella. I just found you." I could hear the suffering in his voice.

"I'm sorry. I should never have allowed you to get close."

"Never say that." He admonished in a stern voice.

I remained quiet as I relaxed into his body. I started to tremble as night fell upon us. It was a cold night and my clothing was anything but dry.

"Let's get you home." He whispered as he picked me up and walked me to his car.

The ride to my house was quiet, there was nothing left to say for now. We held hands the entire time. As we reached the house I didn't want him to leave. I wanted him to stay with me. I never wanted to be parted from him again.

"Edward." I began. I could feel the blush enter my face as I continued with my request. "Will you stay?"

He looked at me with a confused expression on his face. "Will you stay with me tonight." I clarified.

He grinned. "I have to drop off my car. I'll be in your room by the time you go to bed tonight."

I smiled at him before getting out of his car. So much had been admitted, it was hard to believe it had all happened in one short night.


	18. Chapter 18

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

Charlie came home only minutes after Edward left. I rushed up to my room to take care of my things so that I could make dinner and see Edward that much sooner. I already missed him.

"Bells?" I heard Charlie call from the bottom of the stairs.

"Yeah. I'm home. I'll be down in a minute to cook dinner."

I heard him mumble something in return but it was too low for me to catch. I threw my books onto my desk without a second glance and went downstairs. Within a few minutes I had fish frying in a pan.

I was antsy all through dinner, eating very little. My hopes of Charlie not noticing were dashed as he appraised my half eaten plate of food and then me.

"Are you feeling ok?"

"Yeah, I'm perfect. Why?" I asked innocently.

"You haven't eaten hardly anything." He observed.

As if to contradict his observation I scooped a huge fork full of fish into my mouth and smiled.

He frowned sighing. I forced myself to finish all the food on my plate as to keep Charlie's worries and suspicions at bay.

"So any plans tonight, or this weekend?"

"I'm too tired to do anything tonight." I offered hoping he would not press about my plans for the weekend. It was not that I didn't want to tell him about my plans with Edward. With Charlie less was better.

"You don't seem very tired." He stated raising his eyebrows at me.

I shrugged as I got up to take care of his plate and my own. He didn't say anything but I could feel his eyes on me as I rinsed the plates off.

"If you're really tired Bella I can take care of the dishes tonight."

I turned and smiled at him over my shoulder. "It's fine. I can handle it."

He nodded. "Do you have any plans this weekend?"

I shrugged. "I was planning on going to check out a few bookstores." I did not feel the need to tell him where and who I was going to be with. It would only cause him to ask more questions. "Do you have plans?" I asked trying to change the subject.

"I was planning on going fishing with Billy this weekend."

"Oh, well have fun." I secretly rejoiced knowing he would not be around when Edward and I left for Seattle. I turned to smile at him as I walked to the stairs. The dishes were done and drying on a towel. He opened his mouth to say something but I cut him off. "If you don't need anything dad I'm going to bed now."

"No. I'm fine go to bed." He said as he got up and made his way to the living room.

I forced myself to walk slowly up the stairs as not to trip or alert Charlie to how I was really feeling. I took a quick shower and towel dried as fast as I could. I took my towel and whipped the steam from the bathroom mirror to get a better look at myself. My face was red and blotchy from the heat of the shower. It was the most color I had seen in my face in a long time. I still had deep circles under my eyes and they looked hectic and unsure. Would he come back? How long would I have to wait? What if he changed his mind? I shook my head from side to side dispelling my thoughts. He promised to return soon and he would.

As I was entering my room I stubbed my foot on the threshold. "Ah!" I cried as I grabbed my foot and half hopped half walked to my bed. It was throbbing terribly.

"Bells? You ok?" Charlie called from the bottom of the stairs.

"Yeah. I just stubbed my toe." I yelled back through gritted teeth. "No big deal."

I heard him grunt in reply and walk away from the stairs.

I brought my foot closer to me to inspect the damage. My toe was very red, but there was no blood. I winced as I touched the afflicted area. 'Great,' I thought, 'just what I need.'

I felt a cool breeze and then something cold on my arm I gasped snapping my head up and found Edward standing next to me. I breathed a sigh of relief as I watched him kneel before me and remove my hand from my foot. He gingerly stretched my leg out to inspect the damage for himself. He frowned as he trailed his fingers across my foot. His touch was so soft I could barely feel it.

"Can you flex your toes?" He finally asked.

I winced as I curled my toes for him.

"I don't think anything is broken. It may be tender for a few days though." He explained. He dipped his head down placing a small chaste kiss on my foot.

I blushed as he turned back to look at me with a smile on his face. We stared at each other for a while saying nothing. I could feel my heart racing as he rubbed soothing circles into my foot. His cool touch felt good as the throbbing sensation spread throughout my foot.

He sighed. "What am I going to do with you?" He asked softly.

My face reddened again as I smiled in return.

Eventually, he dropped my foot to sit next to me on the bed, never breaking eye contact with me.

I smiled. "You came back."

He grinned. "I promised I would."

He reached out for me and took me into his arms and I sighed happily wrapping my own around his back. He dropped his head to bury it in my hair inhaling deeply.

"Mmmm."

I pulled back to look at him with a confused expression on my face.

He shrugged shyly. "You smell good, especially when you're wet."

My cheeks burst into flames as I dropped my head.

He chuckled pulling me into his arms. Before I knew what was happening he cradled me in one arm as he lifted me from the bed, and turned down my sheets. He placed me down on the bed ever so gently as he tucked me in.

"You should sleep. We have a big day tomorrow and you look exhausted." He whispered with a stern look in his eyes. He sat on the very edge of my bed as he stroked my hair lovingly before kissing me softly on the forehead. He got up to leave but I grabbed his hand forcing him to sit back down.

"Stay." I pleaded.

"I am." He replied a little confused.

I bit my lip nervously and could feel my cheeks once again get hot. "Stay here." I clarified scooting over to make room for him next to me on the bed.

He smiled warmly at me and kicked off his shoes. He slid effortlessly into the space next to me wrapping his strong stone arms around me. I sighed contently as I scooted my body closer to him. I tried closing my eyes to sleep but my mind was racing. Edward was in my room, and in my bed. I blushed at how scandalous the whole situation seemed when something occurred to me, Edward never told me what he did at night? What would he do while I was sleeping since he couldn't?

"Edward?"

"Mmmmm." I could feel his face very close to mine and hear him inhaling deeply every so often.

"What do you do at night? You never told me."

He paused briefly. "This."

"What?" I asked perplexed. I turned to see his face and he smiled. He raised a hand to my face and began softly tracing my features with his fingertips leaving my skin tingling in their wake.

"Mostly I come here and watch you sleep."

I furrowed my eyebrows at him. "Why?" I was shocked. What could possibly possess him to do that? I wasn't even that interesting when awake I could only imagine how boring I must be when asleep.

"You're so beautiful when you sleep, like an angel, and sometimes you talk."

My eyes widened and I could feel my heart rate accelerate. "No." I breathed as I brought my hands to my face to hide myself from him. I knew I sometimes talked in my sleep I just never thought it would be a problem until now. I could feel myself turning deep red as I shook my head back and forth.

He tensed next to me, and the room grew silent. I refused to look at him. I was too embarrassed. I tried to remember all that I had been dreaming and my face grew even redder. As of late almost every dream I had was about Edward. There was no way I had not said his name at least once.

"Tell me what you're thinking?" He asked in an anxious tone after a few minutes had passed.

"I'm trying to figure out what you could have heard." My hands muffled my voice, but I knew he had heard every word.

I felt his hands cover mine as he removed them from my face. I averted my eyes from him too embarrassed to meet his gaze.

"Please don't be self conscious. You have nothing to worry about. You talk a lot about your mother. You worry about her being happy."

I sighed resigned and looked up at him. "Anything else?"

He smiled gently and laid his hand to the side of my face affectionately. "You did say my name."

I groaned. "How much?"

He shrugged and I groaned again. If he wasn't willing to tell me it had to be a lot.

He pulled me to him and held me tight. "Please don't worry. If only you knew how it made me feel to hear you say my name." He mused as he started kissing me down my face. My eyes closed on their own accord as his lips trailed across my jaw and down my neck, and back up again.

"Bella." I heard him barely whisper, his lips only centimeters from my own. My breath caught in my throat as his lips crashed into mine with such passion I could feel myself becoming light headed. Our lips moved in perfect synch as we held each other close. Just as I thought I was going to lose consciousness he pulled away and I gasped for air.

He chucked as he bent down to place his lips to my ear. "If I could dream at all, Bella love, it would be about you." He paused to kiss me once more on my forehead. "I love you."

"I love you too." I whispered back still a little breathless from the amazing kiss we had just shared.

Once again he pulled me close to his chest wrapping his arms securely around me. I could feel my eyes growing heavy, but I was still too jittery to sleep. "Sleep now. I promise to be here when you wake. I'll keep you safe."

I closed my eyes only to open them seconds later. "I can't, not with you here."

He pulled away a little. "I can leave." He offered.

"No. Don't." I said too loudly pulling him back down to me.

He chuckled and wrapped his arms back around me. "Try Bella." He whispered into my ear. His sweet breath caused goose bumps to break out along my neck. Never had I felt so secure as I did tonight wrapped in his arms. A feeling of peace and contentment washed over me as he began humming a song to me. I had never heard it before. It was very soothing and so beautiful; before I knew it I was fast asleep.


	19. Chapter 19

All Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I could feel something soft running across my face and I instinctively brought my hand up to brush it away. I was having the most wonderful dream about Edward saying he loved me and I did not want to wake up.

I froze as my hand came in contact with something smooth and cold.

"Good morning."

My eyes flew open at the sound of his voice. There, only inches from my face, was Edward's, with a wide grin. My heart picked up pace as I remembered all that had happened last night. He ducked his head and began giving me butterfly kisses all along my jaw and neck. That must have been what woke me up. I leaned my head back to give him more access as I enjoyed the new sensation.

"You stayed." I said as he finally stopped to look back up at me.

"Of course." He smiled.

It felt unbelievably good to wake and find his arms securely around me. I had slept so well for the first time in a very long time, I actually didn't feel tired.

I stretched my arms above my head and I could feel Edward shake beside me. "What time is it?"

"A little after 8."

"Wow." I was shocked. I never slept that late.

He chuckled. "Is Charlie here?"

"No. He left early. He left a note for you downstairs on the table."

I nodded my head keeping my eyes glued to his. He was so glorious, just as beautiful as ever. We stared at one another for a long time saying nothing as we held each other close.

Edward was the first one to break the silence. "When do you want to leave?"

I snuggled closer to him burying my face in the crook of his neck. "Do we have to?"

He chuckled. "I thought you wanted to go get some new books?"

I groaned softly. Unfortunately, I was in desperate need of new reading materials. He had me. "Yeah ok. I need a minute to be human first."

He smiled widely and let me go. I reluctantly got up from my bed and grabbed my bag of toiletries as I headed down the hall to the bathroom.

I instantly blushed deep red as I took in my appearance. I was a total mess. My hair was knotted and sticking up in some places, and my face had been very blotchy before I started to blush.

I moaned as I covered my face with my hands. Edward had seen me like this. Why hadn't he told me I was such a mess? I undressed quickly feeling a little irritated that he had said nothing and climbed into the shower. The water felt unbelievably good and served to calm my nerves.

I dressed quickly, putting my pajamas back on, and walked back to my room to find it empty. I looked around, but could not find Edward anywhere.

"Edward?"

"I'm downstairs." He called just loud enough for me to hear.

I smiled as I shut my door. I opened my closet door and stood there with my hands on my hips. I didn't know what to wear. I knew we were going to a bookstore, but did he have other plans? Would jeans be too casual?

I finally decided on a cerulean blue sweater with a white tank top underneath. I decided to wear jeans, a darker pair, the only ones that really fit me well after all the weight I had lost. I looked at myself in the mirror one last time. I was far from perfect but it would have to do.

I made my way downstairs wondering where Edward would be. I found him sitting in a chair at he kitchen table his eyes on me. As soon as I approached he got up and came to my side. He took my hands in his and smiled.

"You look beautiful." He let go of one of my hands to caress my face. "I love this color on you. It looks lovely with your skin."

I could feel my cheeks get hot and he chuckled.

"Anything is better than this morning." I said feeling irritated again. "Why didn't you tell me I was such a mess?" I demanded.

He shrugged unrepentantly. "You weren't. You were just as beautiful then as you are now."

I rolled my eyes at him secretly pleased, and he smiled crookedly at me washing all my former irritation away.

"What would you like for breakfast? I could take you out." He offered.

I shook my head. "I'll just have cereal."

I let go of his hand and gathered all I needed for my breakfast as Edward sat down and watched. Sure enough there was a note from Charlie on the table telling me he wouldn't be back until late from fishing and I should have a good day. I felt a little self-conscious as Edward watched me eat and decided to distract him.

"How was your night?" I asked as soon as I had cleared my mouth.

He grinned his eyes sparkling. "Pleasant."

I groaned putting down my spoon as a light blush covered my face. "What did I say?"

"Nothing terrible." He soothed.

I stared at him waiting and he smiled. "You said my name, and that you loved me."

"You already knew that." I pointed out.

He shrugged. "It was still nice to hear just the same."

I turned my attention back to my cereal and finished quickly. As soon as I was done he grabbed my bowl and before I knew it was washed and dried.

"I could have done that."

He shrugged smiling. "Are you ready?"

I stood up and smiled. "Yup."

He chuckled as he grabbed my hand leading me outside to his car. I was surprised to find it sitting in the driveway, but I remained quiet as I got in.

Quicker than what seemed possible he was already in the driver's seat and driving down the road.

"Edward, when did you get your car?"

"While you were showering I ran home."

"Hmm." I still didn't know much about his family and I started to feel nervous wondering if they knew about me. I brought my hand to my lips and chewed absently at my thumbnail. Did they know that I knew their secret? What did they think about their brother falling for a human, a sick human at that? Did they hate me?

"What are you thinking?" He asked pulling me from my thoughts. I looked up at him and saw that his eyes were deeply curious.

"I was wondering about you family." I responded automatically without really thinking as I got lost in his eyes.

"What exactly were you wondering?"

I started nibbling at my nail again as I contemplated telling him all my concerns. He had looked back towards the road as he waited.

"Well…I was wondering what they thought about this." I said gesturing between the both of us with my free hand.

"This?" He asked raising his eyebrows at me.

I sighed. "You know, us."

"There are no secrets in my family. It really isn't practical."

I gaped at him. "You mean they know _everything_?" He had told them all my secrets--his entire family new my most private thoughts and concerns, my own family didn't even know. I couldn't believe he had betrayed my trust. At first I felt hurt, but I was soon overcome with anger. I could feel the tears welling in my eyes as I looked away.

"Calm down Bella. Not everything." Edward quickly soothed reaching out to grab one of my hands. I pulled my hand away and folded my arms across my chest.

"Do they know I'm sick?" I demanded.

He sighed heavily. "Yes."

Never had I felt so betrayed. He had promised he wouldn't tell. He had promised. Hot tears fell down my face as I stared out my side window.

"Do they know I'm dying?" I whispered.

"Yes." He said in a low tone.

I tried to swallow but my throat was too tight. "I want to go home."

"Please let me explain." He urged.

I shook my head. "Did you tell them about me after you promised not to? That's all I want to know right now."

He paused. "Yes, and no. They knew you were sick Bella, we all did the first day we say you." I didn't say anything as he tried to explain his answer to me. "As you know we have an enhanced senses and can tell from the smell of someone's blood when they are sick."

I furrowed my brow as I finally turned to look at him. "You knew all this time. Why didn't you say anything?" I demanded.

That still didn't explain how his family knew I was dying. Why had he been so persistent to find out what was wrong with me if he already knew? What kind of game was he playing with me?

"You didn't want anyone to know. It would have seemed odd for me to approach you and tell you that I knew you were sick without you telling me first. You would have been suspicious and never would have trusted me." I looked down at my lap reaching up to wipe the tears from my face.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly as he gathered his thoughts. "That night in the woods, when I brought you home…Carlisle knew something wasn't right. You were in too much pain…" He trailed off with a pained expression on his face as he remembered that night. I had never seen him struggle for words so much before it seemed almost human. "I talked with my sister Alice after I brought you home."

I frowned in confusion not understanding what he meant. He sighed. "I am not the only one in my family with a special ability. Alice can see the future." I tried to control my surprise as he continued with his explanation. "I asked her to look into your future for me. I wanted to know if you were going to be all right. If you would recover…" He trailed off lost in thought.

"What did she see?" I asked softly after a few minutes.

He kept his eyes on the road as he answered. "That you were getting sicker faster than anyone had expected." I knew there was more, but I did not press for more information. I could guess what else she saw.

"How bad was it?"

He clenched his jaw and I watched as his knuckles tightened around the steering wheel. His nostrils flared and I knew what he had seen. I had witnessed it myself a thousand times in other patients I had seen at the hospital in Phoenix when I went in for treatment.

"Oh. I see." I whispered fighting back new tears that were on the brink of spilling down my face.

"Later you confirmed what she saw in her vision." He hesitated. "I never told anyone how sick you were, but in having Alice look into your future everyone found out."

"They must hate me." I stated in a soft voice.

He turned his head quickly to look at me. His face looked angry. "Why on earth would you think that?"

"For allowing you to get involved with me, for being too weak to stay away from you. I'll only hurt you in the end." I added weakly.

He exhaled sharply. "It is, I, who was too weak to stay away from you. I am the dangerous one here Bella. I am the one who should be hated for allowing you to get close. If I wasn't so damn selfish…" He hesitated before he continued. "My family does not hate you. They are happy that I have finally found someone to love and that loves me in return."

"They don't think it's odd that I'm human?" I asked skeptically.

"A few think I'm crazy, but as long as I am happy they are fine with it."

I smiled weakly, all my previous anger gone. It was quiet for a minute or two until Edward broke the silence. "Are you still angry with me? Do you want to go home? I will understand if you do." His voice was uncertain and anxious.

"No." I replied smiling at him. Relief filled his face as he looked at me. "Will you tell me about them?"

"My family?" He verified.

"Yes. I would like to know more about them."

"Well Carlisle you have already met. He is my father in most senses of the word. He is married to Esme, my mother. She is the most loving person I know." He smiled affectionately as he mentioned her and I knew then that he cared for her deeply. "I already told you about Alice. She is married to Jasper. He also has a special ability. He can feel and manipulate the emotions around him." My eyes widened but I did not interrupt. "Then there is Emmett. Nothing seems to ever bother him. He is married to Rosalie. They have a very…interesting relationship." He chuckled once before continuing. "Of course you have seen them all at school before."

"You care for them a lot." It was a statement not a question.

"I do. In many ways we are much like any other family. Until recently they were the most important things in my life."

I blushed as I realized he was talking about me. He chuckled reaching up to caress my face.

"We're here." He announced.


	20. Chapter 20

All Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I couldn't seem to decide which books to buy. Hours had passed since we first arrived and still I was undecided as to which books to buy. Everything simply looked too interesting. I had narrowed down my original ten choices down to five, and was now trying to pick my three favorites. I bit on my lip as I considered each one, wishing I had brought more money.

"Why don't you just get them all." Edward finally suggested.

He had kept by my side the entire time we were in the bookstore. I caught him staring at me every now and again and I would blush making him grin. Several times I insisted he go off on his own but he refused claiming it was more interesting to watch me, again causing my cheeks to turn red. He never grew impatient with me, even now. I had been reading and re-reading my five choice for the last 20 minutes still unable to decide and yet he showed no sigh of impatience.

I sighed. "I can't. I didn't bring enough money for all of them."

He smiled grabbing my choices and walked to the front counter.

"What are you doing?" I hissed as we stood in line.

"I'm purchasing them for you." He said simply.

"No you're not." I insisted crossing my arms across my chest. I was not going to allow him to spend his money on me.

"Please Bella. I want you to have them." He turned the full power of his eyes on me stunning me in place. His eyes bore into mine with such and intensity I was left breathless. I said nothing as I stared back helplessly.

"Breath Bella." Edward whispered as he brought one hand to my face. I gasped for air and blushed slightly.

"I don't want you spending money on me." I managed to say in a soft voice as we stepped closer to the cashier.

"Please I really want to do this for you."

I debated for a few minutes nibbling on my bottom lip as Edward's eyes pleaded with me.

I sighed. "Fine." I conceded reluctantly.

He grinned widely as he placed my books on the counter for the cashier and purchased them. We walked from the store hand in hand as we made our way to his car.

"Is there anywhere else you would like to go?" He asked as he pulled out of our parking space and drove down the street.

I thought for a moment and then smiled. "Can we go to the beach? It's been so long since I've walked in the surf."

He nodded. "The beach it is."

As soon as we made our way to the edge of the water I leaned down to free my feet. It was anything but warm, but I didn't care. I loved the feel the sand in-between my toes and the water as it lapped at my legs.

As soon as I had one shoe untied I felt a tug on my arm causing me to straighten. I looked up at Edward confused. He was frowning. "What do you think you are doing?" He demanded.

"I'm taking my shoes and socks off."

"It's freezing."

I shrugged as I leaned down again. "At least it's not raining." I heard him let out an annoyed sigh as I took my last sock off and put it inside my shoe.

I looked up at him and smiled. "There's no point in going to the beach it you don't walk in the surf."

I didn't wait for him to respond before I turned and walked ankle deep into the cold water. I tensed slightly as the frigid water splashed against my legs, but did not move from my place. My favorite memories of being with my father were at the beach. I loved the tide pools and playing chicken with the surf. I was so clumsy I ended up falling most of the time. A smile spread across my face as I inhaled the salty air deeply. I closed my eyes as I licked the salt from my lips relishing the taste once more. If only I could stay in this moment forever—if only things didn't have to change. I wrapped my arms around my body, hugging myself. I never wanted to leave. This was exactly what I needed.

I felt something cool being draped around my shoulders and opened my eyes to see Edward's jacket wrapped around me.

"To keep you warm." He stated as he took my hand in his and walked me leisurely along the coast.

We walked in a comfortable silence together for a long while, each one of seemingly lost in thought. I stopped abruptly to snag a shell from the sand. It always amazed me how beautiful and smooth they were, much like Edward, I thought as I ran my fingers over the smooth surface. I looked up at him and smiled. He ginned back giving my hand a gently squeeze. We continued like this for the rest of the afternoon. It was so peaceful and calming. I hated to go back.

Half way back up the beach I could feel myself getting very tired. I had been on my feet for most of the day and it was starting to catch up to me.

I felt Edward squeeze my hand and I looked up at him. "Do you want me to carry you?" He offered with a trace of worry in his tone.

"No, I'm fine." I lied. "Could we maybe sit for a little while?"

He nodded his head in agreement and pulled me up further on the beach. He sat me down next to him and I couldn't help but rest my head on his shoulder. He moved his arm and wrapped it around me pulling me to his chest. As I looked out over the water I could feel my eyes getting very heavy, soon I couldn't keep them open at all.

Abruptly I felt myself air borne and opened my eyes in alarm to find myself nestled in Edward's arms.

"What?" I whispered trying to keep my eyes open.

"Shhh." I heard him say. "Sleep now. I'm taking you home."

I nodded in reply too tired to argue as I felt myself drifting off to sleep.

I groaned as consciousness again befell me. My hand was pounding. I brought my hand to my head; my arm felt like lead as I raised it up. As I grew more awake I noticed more pains. My body ached all over and my throat felt dry and sore. My skin felt cold and clammy. I looked around my room and found myself alone. I had no idea what time it was. I couldn't tell if the sun was rising or setting. I looked for my clock in my room, 6:30, the sun was rising.

I moaned as I got up from bed to go to the bathroom. I nearly fell over a few times but somehow managed to keep my balance. I looked at myself in the mirror and could see how sick I was. My face was grayer than normal, and my eyes looked dead. I splashed some water on my face, before I turned to go back to bed. A wave of dizziness washed through me as I entered my room. I tried to hold on to something but there was nothing near me. I watched as my vision slowly turned black and the world around me disappeared.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

I could hear voices in the distance and I tried to make them out. My head was pounding making it hard for me to concentrate. I could hear two distinct voices. One low the other high. They were both beautiful. I listened harder not quite able to open my eyes just yet.

"You know what I've seen." A high female voice said firmly.

"No. Things change." This voice was deeper, male, and absolute. There was something familiar about it that I couldn't seem to place.

"At least give her the choice!"

"I said, no. I'm not damning her to this life."

"Do you really want to lose her after you just found her?"

"Of course not!" I heard the male voice exhale loudly. "I just can't do that to her."

"Ask yourself this, can you truly live without her?"

There was a short pause. "No." His voice was so soft and full of such grief it broke my heart to hear.

"Then do something about it." The high female voice implored. "You're the only one who can."

Again there was a pause. "I won't do that to her." He whispered so low I almost didn't catch it.

I listened closely for a few more minutes but all was silent. Either they had left the room or were talking too softly for me to hear.

In time I was able to open my eyes and realized I was back in the hospital. I still did not feel well, but nowhere near as bad as I had before. My shoulder ached and I looked down to find my arm in a sling. I furrowed my brow as my mind raced trying to remember what had happened. I had fallen asleep on Edward at the beach then I had woken up in my room. I had gone to the bathroom and then back to my room…

"Good morning beautiful."

I turned my head to the side and couldn't help the small smile that spread across my face as I looked into Edward's golden eyes. "Hey." I answered in a hoarse voice.

"How are you feeling?" I could see the concern in his eyes though he tried to hide it.

I stopped to clear my throat before I answered. "I've been better." I admitted as my mind finally retrieved my lost memories. "How did I get here?"

He looked away as he answered. "I left you in your room while I went to drop off my car. I could feel the onset of a fever when I held you in my arms and I was worried so I decided to check in with Carlisle." He paused. "I thought you'd be sleeping longer." He whispered more to himself than to me as he shook his head. "I returned a few hours later and found you on the floor in your room. I rushed you to the hospital. You've been asleep ever since."

I could hear how upset he was with himself and could hear the worry in his voice. "Edward you can't be everywhere."

It was quiet for a few minutes until I reached out to him and stroked the back of his head with my hand. His hair was unbelievably soft and silky. He turned to look at me with pained eyes. "I never should have allowed you to walk in the water. I should have kept you home where you would have been safe."

"Edward Cullen this is not your fault." I said in a stern voice. "I am perfectly capable of making my own decisions. I'm glad we got to go out together." I kept my eyes locked with his as I tried to convey my message to him. I didn't want him to feel guilty at all. Getting sick comes with the territory when you have Leukemia, especially a case like mine.

He grabbed one of my hands and held it tightly in his. He dropped his gaze to stare at our hands intertwined together. He said nothing as his thumb played across the back of my hand.

"So." I sighed as my head pounded. "What's the verdict? How bad am I?"

He looked up at me, his face ambivalent. "You dislocated your shoulder when you fell, and gained a few more bruises that will be sore for the next few days."

Now I knew why my body seemed unusually sore, but it had not escaped my notice that he had yet to tell my why I fainted, and had such a high fever. I waited patiently for him to continue when it became obvious he wasn't going to I sighed.

"What else?" He pursed his lips. "I'll just call the doctor in if you don't tell me." I warned.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "You have a virus. The doctors aren't sure if you are strong enough to fight it off and they are afraid it will turn into pneumonia."

"So that's what all this is for." I said gesturing to the IV I was hooked up to.

He nodded.

"This is normal you know, and I don't feel as bad as I did." It was true. Although I felt anything but normal my head didn't hurt half as much and my throat was completely fine.

He looked at me skeptically but did not respond.

"I'll be out of here and back in school before you know it." I tired to comfort him.

He chuckled. "Let's work on getting you home before we talk about going back to school all right?"

"Fine, I'll be home before you know it." I soothed.

His face became very serious as he stared deeply into my eyes. "Promise?" He asked as he brought my hand to his lips kissing my knuckles gently.

"Promise." I smiled. I had no idea if I would be able to keep my word, but I needed to ease his concerns somehow. I didn't want him distressing over me.


	21. Chapter 21

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

**PLEASE READ**

**Attention all readers----- I am leaving in two days for Germany and will not be able to update for a few weeks. This will be the last chapter for a little while. I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas! I will try to update as soon as I get back in the States.**

Edward stayed by my side all day. Even when Charlie showed up to check on me he stayed, sitting in a chair in the corner. I tried to get him to leave but he refused. It was beyond comforting to have him around but I felt bad. I slept most of the time and I knew he must be bored, though when I asked he denied it.

"Go home. Spend some time with your family. You've been here all day. Visiting hours are almost over. Go. I'll just be sleeping." I encouraged.

"I'm staying." He said sternly squeezing my hand he held in his.

"Please. I feel bad. You've been spending all your time here with me. Your family must miss you." I reached up further examining his face and touched the dark circles under his eyes. "Besides it looks like you could use another camping trip." I muttered suggestively.

He shrugged. "It's nothing. I'm perfectly fine."

"You're so stubborn." I sighed.

He grinned and reached up to brush a piece of hair from my face. "I've learned from the best."

I opened my mouth to speak but he cut me off with by planting a soft kiss on my lips. Before I could deepen it he pulled away.

I could see the corners of his lips twitch as he took in the slight pout of my face. "You need to rest."

"Will you sing to me?" I asked.

"Any requests?" He questioned as he released my hand and tucked the blankets around me.

I shook my head and closed my eyes as I waited. He hummed the same beautiful song to me that he had before. It was unbelievably sweet yet still complex in nature. Within minutes I floated off to sleep on the notes of Edward's lullaby.

I opened my eyes expecting to see Edward but was surprised by who I found standing beside my bed. A small pixie like creature stood next to me with a brilliant smile across her face. I smiled back hesitantly recognizing her as, Alice, one of Edward's sisters.

"Good morning Bella."

"Hi." I said tenitively not quite sure why she was in my room. "Where's Edward?"

"Oh he'll be back in a few minutes. Don't worry. I just thought it was about time you and I met. I'm Alice." She said exuberantly.

I smiled despite myself. "Nice to meet you Alice. I'm Bella."

She smiled brightly. We began talking together and the conversation simply flowed. It felt more like we had known each other for years rather than a few short minutes. She was easy to be around and I found myself laughing more than I had in a long time.

"Hey what's going on in here?"

I turned to look at the door and my smile expanded across my face. "Edward." I breathed happy to see him.

"Good morning. How are you feeling?" He asked his eyes roaming my face, instantly turning wary as he awaited me response.

"Better, especially now that Alice is here."

"Hmm." He came to my side and touched one cool hand to my forehead. "No fever. That's good. Keep this up and you'll be home in no time."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Thanks dad." I muttered sarcastically.

He scowled at me obviously not enjoying my sense of humor. We both turned as we heard Alice's high pitch laugh next to us.

She gave Edward a knowing look and then beamed. "She's perfect, absolutely perfect."

I blushed at her words and looked away self-consciously.

"So Edward, Bella and I were talking in your absence." Alice began. I looked up to see what she was going to say. She winked at me before she turned back to her brother.

"Oh really? And what have you two been discussing?" He asked as he tried to keep from smiling.

"I think it's about time she met the whole family, but she isn't sure if you want her to yet."

My eyes widened at her words and I felt my mouth drop open. How could she do this to me? I felt my cheeks burn with the embarrassment that was washing through me in waves. I quickly buried my face in my hands. "That's not what I said." I mumbled through my hands.

"It's what you meant." Alice concluded matter-of-factly.

I heard a low growl coming from Edward's direction and I peeked through my fingers to look at him. He was giving Alice a very dirty look. "Of course I want Bella to meet everyone." He explained through clenched teeth. "I was waiting until she was better to bring it up. The last thing she needs is added stress in her condition."

I bristled at his words. I knew he didn't mean anything by them, but I would be damned if I was going to let him start treating me like a cripple.

I removed my hands from my face and raised an eyebrow at Edward. "What condition would that be?"

He reached out to touch me face. "Bella." I know he meant to sound soothing but he sounded more condescending to me than anything else.

I moved my face out of his reach and he dropped his hand instantly. "Really Edward, I would like to know."

He pursed his lips. "You're sick Bella you need to take it easy to remain healthy as long as possible."

"I'm not going to stop living just because I'm sick." I shot back defiantly.

He narrowed his eyes at me and clenched his jaw. "I'm not asking you to stop living, just the opposite actually. But you need to take things easy. You can't go off spending all day in the city anymore."

"Oh really? Well what if I told you that Alice and I already made plans to spend the day shopping once I get out of here?"

He glared at me for a few minutes and I could see he was trying to rein his anger in. He leaned over and pinched the bridge of his nose with his forefinger and thumb saying nothing as he sat on the side of my bed.

After a few moments he sighed dropping his hand to his side. "I just don't want to lose you." He whispered.

"Edward." I sat up straighter in bed and reached resting my hand to his face. "I can't live my life in fear of death. I have to have fun too. Let me live while I can."

He placed one of his hands over mine securing it to his face. "There are other things you can do that are fun and less tiring for you."

"I refuse to stop doing things for fear it may shorten my time left." I hesitated before I continued seeing the pain in his eyes. "Please understand. That's what I have always loved about you. You never pitied me or treated me differently. Please don't start now. Let's just enjoy the time we have together."

"It's not enough time." He whispered as he reached out and caressed my cheek.

"You know how to fix that."

I had been so wrapped up in my conversation with Edward that I had completely forgotten that his sister was still in the room and I blushed. There was something about her comment that caught my attention though. Before I could place it I was interrupted by the growing rumbling sound in Edward's chest.

"Thank you Alice. You can leave now." Edward growled as he turned to glare at his sister.

She giggled and then turned to me. "It was nice talking to you Bella. You know where to find me if you still want to go when you get out." She turned on her heel and gracefully walked from my room.

I stared after her as my mind worked furiously trying to place the familiarity of her words. Edward knew how to fix what? My head was spinning as memories of my first day in the hospital filled my mind.

"_I said, no. I'm not damning her to this life."_

"_Do you really want to lose her after you just found her?"_

"_Of course not!" I heard the male voice exhale loudly. "I just can't do that to her."_

"_Ask yourself this, can you truly live without her?"_

"_No."_

"Then do something about it." The high female voice implored. "You're the only one who can."

I turned my head quickly to Edward. "Has Alice been here before?" I was sure it was Edward and Alice that I had heard.

"Why?"

"I'm sure I heard you two talking yesterday."

"What did you hear?" He asked warily.

"You were talking about me and how you didn't want to lose me just like now, except Alice was telling you there was a way you didn't have to. You seemed very upset by her suggestion."

"You heard all that?" He furrowed his eyebrows.

I nodded my head. "What did she mean?"

He sighed running one of his hands through his bronze locks. I waited as the minutes ticked by for him to explain growing more frustrated by each passing second.

"Edward, what did she mean?" I echoed impatiently.

"She was suggesting that I save you."

"Save me? I don't; understand Edward. How could you save me?"

"By making you one of us." He said in a low voice.

I contemplated his words for a few minutes before I fully understood what he meant. "You can do that?" I asked intrigued.

"I won't." He replied firmly gazing deeply into my eyes.

Silence fell between us as we looked into one another's eyes. His eyes help such sadness I couldn't understand why. I could be with Edward forever if I was like him. It seemed to be the perfect solution to all my problems.

"Why not?" I finally asked breaking the silence between us.

"You don't know what you ask."

"I think I do."

"You don't." He replied curtly as he looked away.

I was taken back by his harshness and swallowed hard trying to fight back the tears just as the doctor came in. He took one look at the two of us sensing the tension and eyed Edward disapprovingly.

"If you'll excuse us young man. I need to speak to Isabella alone."

Edward nodded curtly and left the room without a single glance my way. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath to calm myself as the doctor came closer to me. He didn't say anything as he checked my vitals and progress.

"You seen much better today. If you still have no fever by this evening you may go home tomorrow morning."

I smiled at him thankful for the opportunity to be in my own bed again.

As the doctor turned to leave he stopped short and turned back to me. "I must stress how important it is for you to be calm and strain free right now so that your body can heal properly. Please try to keep things simple."

I nodded in reply anxious to see Edward again. As soon as the doctor left Edward returned to my side and say next to me on the bed taking one of my hands in his.

"I apologize for upsetting you like that." He leaned down and placed a sweet kiss to my forehead and smiled repentantly.

I tried fighting a yawn but lost the battle. Edward chuckled beside me. "Sleep. You've had a long morning."

I nodded as I situated myself on the bed. "This isn't over." I mumbled, as my eyelids grew too heavy to keep open.

I heard him sigh heavily next to me just before his musical voice filled the room with the lullaby I had grown to love.


	22. Chapter 22

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

It felt nice to be in my own bed again. Charlie seemed happy to have me home again and even offered to stay with me today. I tried to hide my grimace at his offer and politely declined. I didn't need his help. I was feeling a lot better. The pain was under control and I was planning on attending school the following day.

As soon as Charlie's cruiser left the yard I got out of bed and made my way into the kitchen. I opened the fridge grabbing the carton of orange juice and a cup from the cupboard.

I turned around and gasped there in one of the kitchen chairs sat Edward his lips twitching as he tried not to laugh.

I scowled at him. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack?" I grumbled as I sat at the table placing a hand over my racing heart.

"Sorry."

I took a few quick breaths and looked up at him unable to stay annoyed. "What are you doing here? Don't you have school?"

He shrugged.

"You can't keep skipping." I chided.

He rolled his eyes at me. "It's not like I'm missing anything." He reached across the table taking one of my hands into his. "How are you feeling today?"

"A lot better." I answered truthfully. "In fact I plan on returning to school tomorrow. It's Friday and I figured I could get the assignments I missed."

"Don't you think you should take the rest of the week off to rest?"

"No. I'm fine."

"Bella, I don't want you back in the hospital."

I sighed. "Edward, I know I scared you. But really trust me I am feeling much better--practically normal. I am actually looking forward to my shopping trip with Alice Saturday."

He looked down at our hands and it was quiet for a brief moment. When he spoke again his voice was low and full of concern.

"Do you think that's wise?"

"What?"

"Shopping with Alice." He answered looking back up at me.

I sighed removing my hand from his and walked around the table to him. I stood in front of him and he opened his arms allowing me to stand in between his legs. We were almost eye-to-eye. I reached up and moved a few stray hairs of his auburn hair from his forehead resting my hands on his face.

"I know you worry about me, but Edward I'm sick. I can't change that. We've been through this." I paused briefly as I searched his eyes making sure he was really listening to me. "I want to _live_ while I can, not merely exist. Staying cooped up in a house all day afraid to get out and do things because it may or may not buy me a few extra days is not living. I want to experience life while I still can, no matter the cost. It's worth it to me."

He still did not look happy about my decision, and I could see the sadness in his eyes. "Please Edward, just try to see my side of things. What would you do if you were in my position?"

He pulled me to him then and held me tight for a long moment. "If you are going out with Alice this weekend can you at least consider taking tomorrow off to rest a little more. Please?"

I smiled. It was a fair compromise. "I think I can manage that, but only if you promise to go to school tomorrow. You've missed enough because of me. People are going to start to talk."

He pulled away and I could tell he was about to object so I quickly cut him off. "I will need my assignments anyway. You can get them for me. I will be fine. You can keep your cell phone on you at all times, and if I need you for anything I will call." He still didn't look convinced so I added. "You can even stop by at lunch to check on me."

"Do you promise to call no matter how small your need may be?" He asked raising one eyebrow at me.

I nodded.

He sighed. "Then I shall go to school tomorrow."

I smiled climbing up into his lap and nestling my face into his chest.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

I was more nervous than I should have been as I heard Alice pull into my driveway. I exited my house quickly and found her waving happily to me from behind the wheel of Edward's car. I couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm as I climbed into the seat next to her.

"You ready Bella?" She chirped.

"Let's go."

I was looking forward to having some girl time. It had been a long time since I had just hung out with anyone. It felt nice. We made it to the mall in Port Angeles faster than I imagined we would. I was frightened to learn that Alice drives as fast as her brother. Luckily she managed to take my mind off the speed every now and again as we talked about our favorite places to go and things we enjoyed doing. I blushed when she brought up her brother and how much we cared for one another. She laughed at my reaction and thankfully didn't press the discussion. My hands were sore when we finally arrived from the firm grip I maintained on my seat as we flew down the highway.

Alice laughed at me as I stretched my hands out in front of me allowing the blood to return to my fingers. I gave her a sour look which she dismissed as we entered the mall.

Shopping with Alice was very interesting. By noon I was exhausted, but in a good way. Watching Alice shop was fascinating. Somehow she knew exactly what she wanted upon entering a store and never had to try anything on. She simple made a quick sweep of the store grabbing at different racks for clothing as she went and then finally ending up at the register. After leaving our fourth store Alice was already loaded down with bags. I still had yet to buy anything.

"We should get you lunch." Alice announced as we made our way down the escalator.

"I'm not really that hungry."

She frowned. "Bella, I promised Edward I would take care of you. If he finds out I didn't feed you…" She trailed off. She didn't have to finish her sentence I knew exactly what he would do.

I sighed. "Fine let's go." There was something I had wanted to talk to her about anyway.

Alice insisted I sit with her bags as she got in line to buy me a turkey sandwich and a root beer. I hated to admit it but my feet were throbbing a little from all the walking I had done.

Alice returned quickly with my food in hand and set it down in front of me with a smile.

"Thanks." I said as I unwrapped my sandwich.

She smiled in return.

"Alice?" I asked after my first bit. "Will you tell me something?"

"Sure." She answered cocking her head curiously to the side.

"Would you tell me the truth, no matter what?" I asked biting my lip and looking down.

"I will always tell you the truth Bella."

Her words rang with sincerity and somehow I knew I could trust her.

"What do you want to know?"

"I was wondering…" I began but then changed my mind deciding to approach the subject in a different way. "I heard you and Edward talking in the hospital when you both thought I was sleeping, and…well…I had a few questions about what I heard."

"A few questions?" She asked skeptically.

"One actually." I clarified looking up at her with pleading eyes. "How do you become a vampire?"

She pursed her lips, frowning, pausing before she answered. "Edward doesn't want you to know that."

"Please. I think I have a right to know."

She sighed heavily as she narrowed her eyes at me deciding. I bit my lip nervously as I awaited her decision.

"I have never done it myself so I can only tell you what I have been told." I smiled brightly at her, forgetting the food in front of me, as I listened intently. "It's not an easy thing to do and requires a lot of restraint. We vampires are given many different weapons as you know, speed, agility, being physically attractive to our pray." She said with a wink. "We are also venomous." She stated turning more serious, her voice very low so only I could hear her. "The venom does not kill it only proves to incapacitate our intended pray. It causes great pain to our victims as it spreads slowly throughout their blood stream, making it impossible for them to escape us."

"And if the are not killed and the venom is left to spread…?" I questioned.

She nodded. "It takes a few days, about three for the transformation to take place. As long as your heart is still beating the venom continues to spread healing and changing you as it moves. It is extremely painful. Think of the worst pain you have ever endured." I shivered at the memory. She nodded knowingly. "Now multiply that a thousand times. During the entire transformation the victim wishes for death to escape the pain."

I looked down at my sandwich as I let her words sink in. "You mentioned that it was hard to do? What do you mean?"

She sighed. "Once we get the taste of blood in our mouths it is hard to stop. To change someone you must not drink them dry…not many of us have the restraint to do that."

I nodded my head. "Thanks."

She shook her head. "He's going to kill me for telling you."

"He doesn't need to find out."

She smiled. "He will." Then she added grumbling, "He always does." She sounded more annoyed than concerned.

"Are you finished?" She asked eyeing my food with a look of disgust. "There are still a few more stores I wanted to go to before we leave."

I nodded in reply throwing my leftovers away in a near by trashcan. I followed her around for the next few hours as we moved decisively in and out of the stores. Only until she had purchased enough clothing to fill a very large wardrobe did she announce that she was finished. I was amazed and baffled with the amount of clothing one small person could buy in one day.

The last store she brought me to I decided to go off on my own for a little while instead of following her. This store was much like the others, nice and clearly out of my price range. As I glanced through the racks of clothing a dress caught my eye. It was one of the most beautiful dresses I had ever seen. It was azure blue and silky. It had a fairly deep v-neckline, at least for me, with an empire-beaded waist. The skirt was straight and flowed seamlessly to the floor. The back of the dress was draped and open. I couldn't seem to keep my eyes off it.

"You should try it on."

I jumped slightly as I turned to find Alice standing behind me with a huge grin on her face. "I have no need for a dress like that, not that I could ever afford it if I did." I noticed it was a Nicole Miller design, clearly out of my price range.

She looked disappointed but didn't press the matter further. I was thankful when she announced that she was ready to go. It had been fun shopping with Alice but I was tired and ready to sit for a while to rest my feet.

As soon as we pulled into my driveway I saw Edward waiting there looking almost relieved that I was still in one piece. I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face upon seeing him. He was at my door helping me out as soon as Alice stopped the car. He pulled me to him in a tight hug.

"I missed you." He whispered into my hair.

"I missed you too."

He pulled away slightly putting one hand under my chin angling my head up as he placed a soft sweet kiss on my lips. I had completely forgotten we were not alone until I heard snickering from behind me. I blushed and looked down.

"Well I will just leave you two love birds alone. Edward you can just bring my bags in for me when you return with the car later tonight." She turned to look at me. "Thanks for going shopping with me Bella."

She smiled as she reached forward and embraced me. "Thanks for taking me. It was fun. We should do it again some time."

She grinned as she made her way to the edge of the forest by my house and disappeared. I turned back to Edward to find a confused expression on his face. His eyes remained fixed on the spot Alice had just occupied.

"Edward?" I asked.

He tuned to me still confused. "Let's get you inside."

I complied not sure of what was going on. We remained quiet as I removed my shoes and got comfortable on the couch.

"So you had fun with Alice?"

"Yes."

"What did you two talk about?" He asked trying to sound casual.

I shrugged. "Lots of stuff."

He nodded his head. "What specifically?" He countered almost instantly.

"Why do you mean?" I was becoming increasingly suspicious, and I was reminded of what Alice said earlier about him always finding things out. He seemed to be fishing for information. But there was no way he could know what Alice had told me, right?

"What things did you discuss exactly?"

"I don't know. Lots of things. Girly things. Why do you ask?"

"Specifically…?" He trailed off raising his eyebrows at me.

I raised my thumb to my mouth and nervously began biting my nail. There was no way I could lie to Edward, but I didn't want to get Alice on trouble. I didn't care if he got upset with me, but I wanted to protect Alice if I could.

I took a deep breath. "If I tell you have to promise not to get upset with Alice. In fact you can't mention it to her at all."

He narrowed his eyes ever so slightly but nodded in agreement.

"Promise?"

"Promise."

I nibbled at my bottom lip as I gathered my thoughts. "I was curious about some things and she was nice enough to explain them to me." I hedged trying to bide my time.

"Some things?" He asked in a tight voice after I paused briefly.

I nodded as I braced myself. "I wanted to know how someone becomes…a vampire." I said whispering the last part.

His eyes instantly became enraged, turning black, and his body tensed. I could tell he was using all his self-control to remain quiet.

"Remember your promise."

He closed his eyes as he reached up with his hand and pinched the bridge of his nose with his forefinger and thumb. He remained silent and unmoving for a long time. I bit at my thumbnail nervously as I awaited his reaction. He wasn't even breathing. I became more and more anxious as the minutes ticked by.

Finally I heard him inhale deeply and let the same breath out very slowly. He dropped his hand from his face but kept his eyes shut. "She had no right. It was not her place." His tone was low and menacing causing me to shiver.

"I had a right to know." I tried to sound strong but my voice came out in a weak whisper.

His eyes shot open at my words and I could see the anger in his eyes. I knew there was no way to reason with him when he was like this and I needed to calm him so that we could talk.

Slowly I inched my way to him keeping my eyes locked with his. I curled myself up in his lap, but he did not respond. I reached up and placed one hand to his face. "Edward, please?" I said softly. "Can't we just talk about it?"

He searched my eyes for a moment and then exhaled heavily into my face stunning me. I could feel his body relax underneath me, and his face nuzzle into my hand. He wrapped his arms around me and held me to him. I knew the worst was now over.

"There's nothing to talk about Bella." He finally said sternly, after a few minutes had passed.

"I think there is." I responded defiantly removing my hand from his face and pushing back from his to better see him.

"There was never any reason for you to know because there is no way I am going to allow that to happen to you. End of discussion."

He was so stubborn! This time it was my turn to growl. I caught him off guard by my reaction and he smirked despite himself.

"Did you just growl at me?" He asked somewhat amused.

I glared at him unwilling to be deterred. "Why won't you even consider it?"

He instantly became somber as he answered. "I won't put you through that kind of pain. I will not damn you to this life. You don't even know what you're asking."

"I do." I said firmly as I felt tears fill my eyes. "I'm asking you to make me yours forever. I'm asking you to save my life."

"I would be robbing you of your life, not saving your life."

"When are you going to except the fact that I am dying Edward? When? No matter how much you or I wish other wise in a few months I won't be here anymore. What then?" I challenged. I saw him flinch at my words, but I had to get through to him and make him understand. I didn't have time to beat around the bush.

He remained quiet as he looked down at my hands intertwined with his. Minutes passed without a word, and I sighed. "Do you love me Edward?"

His eyes shot up to meet mine. "Of course." He responded instantly and with such force it took my breath away.

"Will you at least think about it then? For me, please?"

He searched my eyes for a long moment before he sighed nodding his head in agreement. I smiled brightly at him and wrapped my arms around his neck. I still had a long way to go to convince him, but at least he wasn't saying no anymore.


	23. Chapter 23

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

"Edward?" I called out groggily. I had gone to bed early exhausted from my shopping trip with Alice. Edward had promised he would be there when I woke up, but when I had reached around my bed looking for him he was not there.

"Downstairs." I heard him call just loud enough for me to hear.

I smiled as I took in the smells around me. He was making me breakfast. As I got up and made my way down to the kitchen I wondered where he had learned to cook. It's not like he had a need to cook for himself or anyone in his family, and it was clear from the smell of things he could cook!

He was putting the finishing touches on an omelet he had created for me as I walked into the kitchen. I wasn't that hungry, and I didn't really like omelets but there was no way I was going to tell him that. With the right amount of ketchup almost anything was eatable. This was a skill I learned from living with my mother who could not cook to save her life. Ketchup was a staple at our house, a necessity.

"Smells good." I said as I sat down in a chair at the table.

He placed the food he had prepared in front of me with a glass full of milk and motioned for me to try it. He looked nervous as I cut a small piece off and placed it in my mouth. I was surprised at how wonderful it tasted. It was nothing like the omelets I remembered eating. This was actually good and I had no need of ketchup.

"Wow, Edward where did you learn to cook? This is amazing." I scooped in another mouthful as I awaited his answer.

He looked relieved as he sat down in the chair across from me. "I wasn't sure how it would turn out. It's not like I could try it first. There's not much to do at night and you'd be surprised what one can learn from watching T.V." He smirked.

I shook my head in awe. Only Edward could learn to be a great chef from watching a few cooking shows.

I ate nearly half before I was too full to eat anymore. I thanked Edward again for the great meal. It was by far the most I had eaten and enjoyed in a while.

"So what's on the agenda today?"

"Well, I thought we would hang out around the house and take things easy." I started to protest but he cut me off. "Not your house. I thought you might like to see where I live, and meet my family. But only if you want to and feel up to it." He clarified.

I bit my lip nervously. I wanted to meet his family and learn more about him but I was anxious to meet everyone. What if they didn't like me?

"Sure." I finally answered. "Let me get ready."

He grinned at me as I turned to go shower and change. I couldn't decide what to wear. I wanted to make a good impression, but most of my clothing didn't fit me right anymore. I silently cursed myself for not buying anything while out shopping with Alice when I heard a soft knock on my door.

"Yes?" I called confused.

"I have a box for you. It was left on your doorstep this morning. It has your name in it."

"Do you know who it's from?"

"There's no name on it."

I made sure my towel was securely wrapped around me as I cracked open my door and took the package from Edward.

"Thanks." I called out as I shut the door examining the package. I didn't recognize the handwriting. It was elegant in a way that you don't see everyday. I placed the package on the bed and gently lifted the lid. There was a small note on top that I instantly opened and read.

Dear Bella,

I _**saw**_that you might need this today. It will fit perfectly don't worry! I look forwarding to seeing you again. Everyone is going to love you!

Alice

I pulled back the tissue paper and found a beautiful deep red v-neck top and dark colored jeans. I stared at the clothing in amazement. How did she know my size? _I_ wasn't even sure what size I wore anymore. At least Alice had seen that everything was going to go ok today with her curious ability to see the future. I took comfort in that as I pulled the clothing on and sure enough it fit like a glove. The clothing was obviously expensive and showed in how it hung on my body. It had been so long since I had worn anything form fitting I had forgotten that I had one. I looked at myself in the mirror and was surprised at how good I looked. For the first time in a very long time I wasn't paying attention to how sick I looked, rather how good I looked. It felt nice.

With a huge smile on my face I made my way down stairs to Edward. He froze when he saw me and I looked away blushing with pleasure.

He was instantly at my side and with one hand he raised my chin up to look at him. "You look amazing." The fire in his eyes took me off guard and I could feel my face grow redder. He leaned down and placed a small kiss to my lips before released my face.

He looked me over one last time with a smile plastered across his face before he asked if I was ready to go.

"Yes." I answered and he towed me to the front door.

Of course I had been to Edward's house before but only when I was sick and unable to really take it all in. I knew he lived outside of town down a long road away from people in general. I was once again amazed by the sheer size of his house as we approached.

As he turned off the car I nervously began straightening my clothes and hair. He came to my side of the car and offered me his hand.

"Are you ready? You look beautiful."

I nodded my head as I took his hand and we climbed the front steps to his house. Before we could open the front door Alice appeared as if from nowhere with the door open and beamed at us.

"Bella." She sang as she took me into her arms. "I knew they would be just perfect." She said gesturing to my outfit.

"Yes, thank you."

She dismissed my comment immediately and grabbed my free hand pulling me inside. "Come on, come in." She chirped.

"Take it easy Alice." Edward warned in a low voice from beside me, my hand still firmly within his grasp.

She let go of my hand easily and, seemingly unperturbed, danced her way across the large room and to the stairs where a lean boy sat leaning against the stair case smiling. I recognized him as Jasper Hale from school. He made no move to approach me but I felt oddly at ease with him.

I was so caught up in watching Alice with Jasper that I hadn't even noticed two people who were standing in the entryway.

"Hello Bella. It's nice to see you again." I turned and saw Dr. Cullen standing to the side beside, I could only assume, was his wife.

I stepped forward to shake his hand and smiled. "It is Dr. Cullen, especially under better circumstances."

He chuckled. "Please call me Carlisle."

The women next to him stepped forward and grabbed my hand. "I'm Esme, Carlisle's wife. It's a pleasure to finally meet you dear."

"Thanks you too. You have a beautiful home."

"Thank you." She smiled.

"You probably recognize Jasper from school with Alice by the stair case." Edward said nodding their way.

"Hello."

"Nice to meet you Bella." He answered warmly.

Just then I heard a bellowing laugh come from upstairs. I looked up at Edward confused and saw that he was frowning. When I turned around again I noticed a very large man descending the staircase. He had curly black hair and again I recognized him from school as Emmett Cullen.

He came over to stand in front of me and eyed me shrewdly. "So this is what all the fuss has been about?"

He looked from me to Edward and I could see the mischief in his eyes. I looked to Edward not sure of what to say and saw that his eyes were narrowed and he did not look pleased.

Emmett turned his gaze back to me and I felt myself blush under his stare. He chuckled. "It's going to be fun having her around." He mused. He extended one rather large hand out to me. "Hello Bella, I'm Emmett." He said with a twinkle in his eye.

I slowly extended my hand out to him and smiled up at him. "Nice to meet…Ahhh." As soon as my hand was in his he pulled me up into a bear hug. I could hear Edward growling behind me but Emmett didn't seem to care. I was too shocked to say or do much of anything. I could feel him shake around me as he gently placed me on my feet again. I felt Edward instantly take me into his arms as he continued to growl.

I placed a calming hand to his chest. "Edward stop. It's ok." I whispered. Edward pursed his lips but stopped growling.

Emmett laughed again raising an eyebrow at Edward. "Now I _know_ it's going to be more fun having her around."

I blushed and Emmett grinned widely. I glanced over at Carlisle and Esme and found them both giving Emmett disapproving looks but it didn't seem to bother him at all.

It was quiet for a few moments and I was unsure of what to say. I again took in the large room and marveled at the beauty around me. Everything was so open and white. Everything from the walls to the furniture was white. My eyes fell upon a grand piano I hadn't noticed before it was breathtakingly beautiful. I wasn't sure how I had missed it before. I remembered fondly how my mother used to play when I was a small child. She wasn't very good but she loved to play. She always looked so beautiful as her fingers glided across the keys. At times she would get so lost in her playing the world around her would simply disappear. The piano we had was a second hand upright nothing compared to the magnificent piece in front of me, but to my mother it might as well have been.

"Do you want to see the rest of the house?" I jumped at the feel of Edward's lips at my ear and blushed. I had been so lost in thought I had almost forgotten where I was. Quickly I brushed at my eyes dispelling all traces of the tears that had filled them moments before.

I refocused my eyes and noticed that we were alone in the room. He gave me a quizzical look and I could see a trace of concern in his eyes.

I smiled up at him warmly trying to dismiss his worries. "Where did everyone go?"

He shrugged. "Giving us some privacy I suppose."

He began to pull me towards the staircase and I couldn't help feeling a little anxious. The second floor of the house was just as beautiful as the first. The walls were adorned with great pieces of art I did not recognize. Edward pointed out everyone's rooms just before we came to yet another staircase. The third floor seemed almost identical to the second. He stopped in front of one door and turned to smile at me.

"My room." He announced as he opened the door up for me to enter. He held the door open allowing me to go in first. I was amazed at what I saw. The entire room was done in gold. The floor was covered in a thick gold carpet and the walls were draped in similar material. The South wall was one big window and just opposite was a wall filled with CD's. There was a very large comfortable looking black couch in the center, no bed.

I instantly made my way to his music collection baffled by the mere size and variety of it. "Music must be very important to you." I surmised as I turned to see where he was in the room. I found him standing in front of a very expensive looking stereo system fiddling with a few buttons.

He chuckled. "You could say that."

I looked once more around the room and suddenly the walls and flooring took on new meaning. "Good acoustics?"

He chuckled again as he approached me nodding his head and taking my hand in his. He brought me to the couch and pulled me down so that I was sitting in his lap. He had a small remote in his hand and pressed a few buttons and music instantly filled the room. It was a soft classical number. Nothing I recognized, but it was very beautiful.

"That piano downstairs is it yours? Do you play?"

He nodded. "A gift from Esme and Carlisle."

"Will you play for me sometime?" I asked eagerly. I was truly starting to understand how much about him I still did not know.

"Anytime you wish." He picked up a piece of my hair and began twirling it within his fingers. "What were you thinking about downstairs? You were so far away and you looked so sad."

I looked down before I answered. "I was remembering my mother, and how she loves to play the piano." I laughed once. "She's not very good, but that never discourages her. It's her refuge from the world I guess you could say."

"Hmm." He answered after short second. "For me as well."

I turned to him then. "Have you always played?"

"My entire life." There was something about the way he answered that made me wonder exactly how long that life had been.

I reached up and cradled his angelic face within my hands and studied his eyes for a short moment. "There's so much about you I still don't know. Will you tell me? Will you tell me your story? I want to know everything there is to know about you."

He studied me for a long time before he finally sighed and looked away. "I have done things in my life I am not proud of Bella. Things I never wanted you to know."

"Please. There's nothing you could have done to make me stop loving you. Start at the beginning, go from there."

He looked back at me and studied my face. I'm not sure what he saw there but soon he smiled slightly and looped his hands with mine.

"I was born in 1901 in Chicago. Carlisle found me in 1917. I was dying from the Spanish influenza." I tired to control my reactions as best I could, remaining calm as he continued on with his life story. He described to me how he had been the first to join Carlisle. Esme was soon to follow and then Rosalie. Rosalie found Emmett a few years later mauled by a bear and then was 'saved'. I chuckled briefly upon hearing how Alice and Jasper had joined the family. I could just imagine Alice greeting everyone as if they had been friends their entire lives. I remained stone quiet as he hesitantly admitted to his rebellious years in which he parted ways with Carlisle and his way of life. I knew this was hard for him to admit and I was thankful he was willing to share that with me.

"Because of my enhanced ability." He said lightly tapping his head. "I was able to go after only the most vile of miscreants. I was doing the world a favor after all. Ridding the streets of predators that sought to harm and kill the most innocent, at least that's what I told myself. But," He sighed releasing one of my hands to run his hand through his hair, "as time went on I couldn't justify my actions any longer. I couldn't rationalize all the human life I had taken acting as both judge and executioner. It wasn't right and I began to feel depressed. I had turned into a monster, something I never wanted to be. It only took me a few short years to realize the error of my ways and return to Carlisle and his way of life. He and Esme welcomed me back with open arms. It was more than I deserved."

It was quiet for a few minutes after he finished speaking. I was in a state of awe unable to speak. He had been much more honest with me that I could have hoped he would be. He looked at me anxiously as he awaited my response.

"Are you alright?" He asked hesitantly.

"I'm fine. Thank you for telling me." I whispered.

"You're not…disgusted with me then?"

A look of shock shot across my face at his question. "No, of course not. Why would I be?"

"Bella, I just admitted to being a mass murderer. That doesn't bother you?" He questioned skeptically.

I shrugged.

"Why not?"

"It sounds reasonable given your circumstances."

He looked at me for a brief second as if stunned by my response then laughed louder than I had ever heard him laugh before.

He reached up and tousled my hair. "You are one strange human Bella Swan."

I shrugged and smiled. "But you still love me."

He became serious and cupped my face in his hands. "Yes, yes I do. Very much."

He leaned down and captured my lips with his in a kiss that left me breathless.


	24. Chapter 24

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

With a heavy sigh I opened my truck door Monday morning to face another week of school. I had missed a lot lately and knew people were getting inquisitive. To stifle some of the curious looks I decided to drive myself to school and just meet Edward there. He didn't seem to mind as much as I thought he would and for that I was grateful.

I had spotted Edward the instant I pulled into the parking lot and tried to focus all my attention on him. He stood casually leaning against the door of his car staring in my direction seemingly oblivious to the light rain that fell around him. I was so focused on him that I failed to see Mike as he approached me until it was too late.

"Hey Bella." Mike said as he stepped in front of me blocking my view of Edward. I had to angle my head up to look at him causing my face to get slightly wet from under my hood.

"Hey Mike."

"How are you? I haven't seen you in a while." I tried to fight the waves of irritation I was feeling upon hearing the genuine concern in his voice. He was a nice guy after all.

"I'm perfect."

"Where have you been? I've been worried." He admitted sheepishly.

"I had a bad case of the flu is all. I'm feeling much better now." I lied easily.

"I heard you were in the hospital." He said in a soft voice. "I thought flu season was over."

"Yeah well…I guess not. I just got a little dehydrated and needed some extra fluids. It was no big deal. They sent me home in no time." I smiled trying to play off my time in the hospital. I idly wondered how he had found out I had been in the hospital as I caught Edward approaching out of the corner of my eye.

I breathed a silent sigh of relief as he stood behind me and took my hand. "Good morning Mike." He said in a pleasant even voice.

"Edward." Mike responded never taking his eyes off me.

"Bella we need to go now or we'll be late for our first classes." Edward said as he leaned down possessively to whisper in my ear.

I blushed and waved a quick goodbye to Mike as I allowed Edward to pull me away.

The next few weeks went by surprisingly well after that first day back. Most people seemed to buy my flu story with little convincing. Mike proved to be the only one who required further explanation. Beyond being utterly worn out at the end of each and everyday I was doing fine. I took to taking naps every afternoon and they seemed to help a lot.

The pain was starting to worsen but I kept it carefully hidden from Edward. He didn't need to worry about me. I was due back to the doctor's soon and could ask for an increased dosage of pain medication. I was a little concerned he might put me on a morphine shot, but surely I wasn't that bad yet. Of course I knew what that meant, but I refused to mention anything to anyone. I was steadily getting worse just as my doctor had promised I would, but no one would know by looking at me. I was becoming a master at hiding how I was feeling. But there were still a few people I could not hide from—like today.

The day had dragged on. I was in so much pain I almost couldn't bear it. I refused to give into it and tried my best to hide how I was feeling. It had come on so suddenly that I didn't really have time to adjust to it. By lunch I was a mess.

I walked slower than usual to lunch arriving late. Edward was there at the door waiting for me with a look of concern.

"Are you all right?"

I forced a smile on my face. "I'm fine." I could feel the cool sheet of sweat on my forehead as I gradually made my way to the table I usually sat at with Edward and sat down.

Edward never left my side keeping one hand on the small of my back. There was already a tray of food in front of him, knowing that he was not going to eat anything, I helped myself to the first thing my hand touched. I took a small bit of one of the french-fries I had grabbed and returned the uneaten portion to the tray. My stomach churned as I forced myself to swallow the food.

I looked up at Edward and saw his forehead creased in worry. I smiled again determined to make it through the rest of the day. He looked past me and I turned to see who he was looking at. I found his eyes locked with Jaspers. I silently cursed under my breath knowing what Jasper was telling him exactly how I was feeling in his mind.

"Bella." He said reproachfully as his eyes once again fell upon me.

I gritted my teeth. "I said I'm fine."

I looked down and once again nibbled on the food on the tray taking deep breaths to help control the pain. Edward remained silent for the rest of lunch sighing occasionally in obvious disgust.

Once the bell rang I gingerly got up from my seat and Edward instantly came to my side. He helped me to our next class, remaining especially watchful as I took my time getting there. It felt good to sit again, and I was thankful for the distraction once the teacher arrived.

Minutes into the teacher's lecture a fresh wave of pain coursed through me causing me to whimper softly as I clutched my hands to the table in a death grip. My body was shaking and my breathing had increased. Unable to take anymore I turned to Edward with tear filled eyes.

"Edward." I managed to murmur through the pain.

He took one look at me, and his face twisted in horror. Before I knew what was happening he scooped me up into his arms and began walking out of the classroom. I could hear the teacher demanding to know what was going on as we left the room, but he simply ignored him as he swiftly made his way to the parking lot. I grabbed fists full of his shirt as I clutched myself closer to him. I breathed in his scent as I tried to escape my world of pain.

He began to gently place me down but I held tighter still. "Don't let go." I half whispered half whimpered.

"I can't drive with you like this Bella." He replied in a strained voice.

I just shook my head. "Don't let go." I needed him near me. His scent was the only thing keeping me sane.

"Get in the back seat with her. I'll drive."

I didn't know where she had come from, but I was thankful Alice had appeared. I buried my head in the crook between Edward's shoulder and neck as he climbed into the backseat with me in his arms. The drive was silent. I wasn't sure where they were taking me, I just knew they were getting me help and that gave me comfort.

The ride was short and before I knew it I was inside again. I looked around to discover I was once again at Edward's house.

"Edward what is it?" I heard Carlisle ask.

"She's really bad. I've never seen her in this much pain." His voice sounded tormented. I wanted to comfort him and tell him everything was all right but I couldn't move my mouth. It was clenched so tight against the pain it was almost impossible to move.

"Bella, have you taken your pain pills today?"

"Hmm." I managed to mumble.

I could hear him fumbling with some things in a bag. "I'm going to give you something for the pain. Try to relax."

I felt a sharp prick in my arm then relief flood through me. My jaw throbbed as it began to relax. I could feel the tension leaving my body and an over whelming sense of sleepiness course through me.

I took a few deep breaths and reached up to rub my forehead with my hand finding it covered in sweat. I opened my eyes and discovered Edward's anxious eyes on me. I smiled sleepily. "Thank you."

"Sleep now Bella. You need to rest." I heard Carlisle say as I once again felt myself become airborne. I was too tired to stay awake to discover where I was being taken.

I knew whose arms I was in and felt safe as I drifted off to sleep.

Slowly I opened my eyes to find myself in Edward's room covered with a thick blanket. It was still light out so I must not have been out for very long. I sat up rubbing my eyes as I looked around the room for him.

"Edward?" I asked sleepily when I did not find him right away.

A second later the door opened and he walked in kneeling at my side. "You're awake." He murmured as he laid his head in my lap and wrapped his arms around my waist. I reached down and began running my fingers through his silky bronze hair.

"How are you feeling?"

I knew what he really wanted to know and I quickly put him at ease. "The pain is completely gone. I'm still a little tired, but much better."

"I was so worried." He admitted in a low voice, burring his head deeper into my lap.

It was time we talked. I needed to be completely honest with him about my condition. I was getting worse faster than I anticipated and I needed to prepare him.

"Edward, we need to talk." I said gently.

He lifted his head to look at me. "I know. I've actually been speaking with Carlisle while you've been sleeping and he thinks these treatments might actually help. They couldn't hurt, and it may at least help with the pain." He rambled on, his voice sounding desperate.

I sighed as I took in his expression. This was not going to be easy. "Edward." I whispered as I raised my right hand to cover his mouth, silencing him. "I'm getting worse."

He looked down taking my hand from his mouth and holding it tightly within his. "That's why I think the treatments…"

I cut him off before he could continue. "Today was only a glimpse of what is to come. Sooner than anyone of us anticipated I am not going to be able to go to school or even walk anymore." I paused briefly to cough. I still had not gotten rid of the cough I had from my illness weeks earlier, yet another sign.

"Most days I can hide my pain." He shot his head up as he realized what I was saying-that I had been in great pain longer than even he realized. I smiled weakly to reassure him. "But it's getting too bad and constant for me to simply ignore anymore."

I looked away as I prepared myself for my next statement. I had a lot of time on my hands recently to consider why Edward wouldn't change me. Why he was so hesitant to even consider it. He didn't want me for all eternity. Though it hurt to realize this I also understood. I was thankful for every moment he was willing to give me and I would be damned if I was going to let his memories of me be tainted.

"I don't want you with me at the end." I breathed slowly, emphasizing each word to make sure he understood me clearly.

"What?" He demanded sharply.

"I want you to have only good memories of our time together. I've thought about this a lot and I understand now why you don't want to change me, and I'm ok with it." I said as I turned back to smile at him. He looked confused and almost angry, but I had to continue. "I just can't let you see me as I get worse, for the same reason I left my mom. I love you too much to do that to you."

It was quiet for a few moments before he responded. "What do you mean you know why I won't change you?' He demanded his voice raising a few octaves.

I was taken aback by how furious he seemed and it took me a moment to respond. I looked down at our hands. "I understand that you don't want me around forever. I'm sorry I have been pressuring you so much. I never understood why you wanted me around in the first place. Don't get me wrong, I'm thankful for every second we've had together."

He reached forward grabbing my face firmly, yet gently, in his hands forcing me to look at him. "Isabella Swan do you truly believe that I don't want you the way you want me? That I don't want you forever?"

I nodded my head as best I could with him holding me. "It's ok." I assured him.

He scowled at me. "No it's not ok." He shook his head. "You foolish girl. I cannot exist without you. You have changed me in ways I never thought possible. When you go…I will follow soon after." He stated firmly.

I blinked my eyes a few times as my mind took in his words. I chose to ignore his last statement afraid to admit to myself what he could be implying. "I don't understand." I finally said.

"Bella, I love you. I do want you forever. There's nothing in this world I want more—but I refuse to damn you and take away your soul. You are my angel from heaven. I will not make you a monster from hell. You're too precious to me."

"But that doesn't make sense. You would rather watch me suffer each day in horrible pain—watch me wither away to nothing than make me yours forever—make me what you are. How is that love?" I knew I was hitting below the belt, but I didn't care. If he knew what laid ahead for me…

"You know it's not…" He stopped short dropping my face. He ran his hand through his hair in frustration breathing out slowly rubbing his temples as if in pain.

Eventually he looked up at me again with a calculating look on his face. "I'll make you a deal."

"Deal?" I asked skeptically.

He nodded his head. "You agree to undergo any and all treatments your doctor suggests." I opened my mouth to protest but he kept talking, ignoring me. "And if after every avenue has been explored, and I do mean every avenue." He said firmly giving me a stern look. "And nothing works…" He sighed, "then I will agree to change you." He looked pained as he uttered his last few words.

"That's a lot to ask of me." I whispered as my mind flooded with memories of previous treatments I had that failed.

"And you of me." He responded not skipping a beat.

I could feel hot tears filling my eyes as I looked upon the man I loved. "I don't know if I'm strong enough to endure them again." I breathed in a hoarse voice as I tried to hold my tears back.

Edward locked his eyes with mine making it impossible for me to look away. "I will be there every step of the way. I will never leave your side. Please, Bella? Just try." He pleaded.

A few silent tears slid down my face. I searched his eyes for a moment and found that I was unable to deny him. I nodded my head in agreement, my throat too tight to speak.

He leaned his forehead against mine, grabbing my face with his hands, and closed his eyes. "Thank you." He whispered and I could hear the relief thick in his voice.


	25. Chapter 25

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

"I'm happy to see you are willing to attempt these new treatments Miss Swan."

I nodded my head numbly at the doctor as he began explaining what the new treatments would entail for me.

"They are more aggressive than anything you have ever had before, but many have seen success where other treatments have failed. I have great hopes for you."

I nodded again and swallowed hard. Aggressive was not a word I had come to appreciate. "Side affects?" I asked in a soft voice.

He sighed. "I'm afraid they will be much the same as what you experienced before, maybe worse."

I winced slightly at his words and again nodded my head to show that I was listening.

"Given your condition I suggest we start as soon as possible." Dr. Spencer advised.

"When exactly will I start? How long before we know if they are working?"

"I would like to start treatments with you by Friday. You will come in three times a week, Monday, Wednesday and Friday. We should know if your body is responding to the treatments within the first few weeks."

"Will I be able to go to stay in school?"

He frowned. "I'm sorry, I don't think that will be an option for you. These treatments are too aggressive." He paused briefly. "I really don't think you will feel up to it. Most likely you will feel too ill."

Friday. I had exactly two days left before the torture would begin. I actually considered baking out of my agreement with Edward as the doctor described how sick I was going to be, but if this meant that I would get what I wanted in the end, so be it. I could submit to a few weeks of sickness if it meant an eternity of happiness with Edward.

"Bella?"

I shook my head clearing my mind of my former thoughts. "Sorry?"

"I asked if you had any questions for me?"

"Um…no. Not right now."

He smiled extending his hand out to me. "I'll see you Friday then bright and early."

I nodded my head and shook his hand. Edward was waiting for me as soon as I exited the door and took me into his strong stone arms.

"I will never leave your side." He promised. I knew he had heard the entire conversation from his position outside the door. There was no need to explain anything to him.

"What about school?" I asked as we walked down the hall to the exit.

"I'm withdrawing. Esme is going to home school me." He explained with a wink.

I frowned. "Edward you can't just do that. What will people think? You have to keep up appearances. You can't…" Edward suddenly cut me off as his lips met mine in a short but very intense kiss. When he pulled away my eyes widened and I was left gasping for air.

"I promised to never leave your side. I plan on keeping that promise no matter the consequence."

"Edward." I said disapprovingly once I had caught my breath again.

"No. I've already discussed this with my family. We are all in agreement, this is for the best."

He opened the passenger side door of his car open for me and I slid inside frowning. He gracefully made his way to the drivers side door and climbed in he turned to me right after he put the key in the ignition.

"It'll be ok Bella. I promise."

I nodded me head and turned to look out my window. I felt Edward grab my hand in his and hold it securely in his as he drove me home. We traveled in silence as I decided what I would tell my father upon seeing him. As far as Charlie was concerned everything was fine. He had no idea how I was really doing.

I said a quick goodbye to Edward until later that night when he would return to my room when Charlie was sleeping. My father was home and I wanted to get this over with.

I found my father in the living room sprawled out across the couch relaxing as he watched the latest sports program on TV. I went in and sat down in a near by chair waiting for a commercial. He was home earlier than usual.

"Dad?" I asked as soon as an advertisement for mouthwash came on. "Can we talk for a minute?"

He sat up straighter and looked at me intently. "Sure Bells. Is everything all right?"

"Yeah." I said instantly falling into my usual routine of downplaying my condition to him. "I mean sort of."

"What is it Bella?" His eyebrows furrowed as he reached for the remote and muted the TV. I knew I had his undivided attention now.

"Well my doctor wants to try some new treatments on me. They are kind of aggressive and well I won't be able to go to school anymore—at least not for a little while."

"What treatments?" He cocked his head to the side as he awaited my response.

"Just some treatments I haven't tried before. They're new and he thinks they might work where the others didn't. I'll have to go in three times a week." I shrugged.

"Will you need a ride, or I mean." He reached up to scratch his head. "What can I do? What do you need from me?" He was completely put of his comfort zone, but more than willing to help me. It was kind of sweet and made me smile.

"Actually, Edward and his father have offered to help me. So you don't have to worry about a thing." I knew my father trusted Carlisle and I figured things would go smoother if I threw him into the mix. My father knew Edward and I were close, but he did not know how close. It was not something we had discussed. He was always polite to him when he saw him with me in the hospital, but that was it.

"Edward huh? Dr. Cullen's son? The one from the hospital? Is he like your boyfriend then?

I blushed at Charlie's words. "I guess you could say that."

"What about school for him?"

"He's being home schooled by his mother." I explained quickly.

He nodded his head as he considered all I had told him. "Well I guess that's ok then. As long as his parents are fine with it." He paused. "When do you start?"

"This Friday."

He looked at me for a long time. "Are you sure you're ok Bells?" Something about his tone made me want to cry. He sounded so concerned and his words were filled with so much love.

"Yeah dad." I managed to choke out. "This is normal procedure kind of stuff. No big deal."

He nodded. "You look kind of tired. Why don't you go to bed and get some rest. I'll take care of you're arrangements for school in the morning."

Charlie and I were not ones for showing our emotions, but I felt the need to hug my father just then. I walked over and reached down embracing him with all the strength I had in me. I could tell I had taken him by surprise but he quickly hugged me back. As I pulled away, I smiled, kissing him on the forehead.

"Night dad."

"Night Bells. Sleep well ok?"

I smiled as I turned for the stairs to take a shower and get ready for bed. The hot water did little to relax me so I decided to cut my shower short and go to bed. I was too worked up to sleep. I decided to prepare my I-pod for my treatments. It was my only escape during the long wait as the poison entered my system. As I shuffled through my CD's, I couldn't decide if I wanted a mix of classical or rock. As I was weighing the odds I felt a breeze behind me and turned to find Edward smiling at me.

"Welcome back."

He smiled then looked at the small collection of CD's I had spread out around me. "What are you doing?" He asked arching an eyebrow at me.

"I'm preparing music for my I-pod. When I begin treatments on Friday…" I trailed off trying to keep the sadness from my voice. "Well it's hard enough without a distraction. I usually listen to music and try to go off into my own little world." I shrugged. "It just makes the time pass faster and easier."

He reached down snatching my I-pod from my hands.

"Hey." I protested. My I-pod was nowhere to be seen.

He smiled. "Allow me."

I looked at him curiously for a few minutes. "What will you put on it?"

He shook his head. "It's a surprise."

I raised my eyebrows at him in disapproval. "I hate surprises." I grumbled.

He chuckled as he leaned down taking me in his arms and cradling me against his chest. He held me with one arm as he pulled down the covers of my bed and placed me inside.

"Trust me."

He kicked off his shoes and climbed into bed next to me. I instantly cuddled close to him and yawned. "Always."

He chuckled kissing me on the forehead. "Sleep Bella."

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

I know this chapter is kind of informational BUT important just the same. It was too long to add to considering what the next scene entails.


	26. Chapter 26

All Characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

I winced slightly as I felt the needle enter my hand. I tried to relax as I closed my eyes and lay back against the bed. The nurse was nice enough to get me an ice pack to help numb the area where the IV entered my hand. As soon as she was gone from the room I pulled my I-pod out anxious to discover what music Edward had chosen for me. He certainly had enough to choose from in his room.

I hit play and waited for the first song to begin. I was instantly blown away by the melody that filled my ears. It was like nothing I had ever heard before. It was so complex, rich, and above all else, beautiful. I could feel my jaw drop the more I listened. Where did he find this music? Who was the composer? I was completely blown away. The next song began soon after and was nothing short of extraordinary. It was softer, sweeter than the first. It caused tears to come to my eyes. There was something almost familiar about it, but I couldn't place it.

My eyes shot open as I realized how I knew the song that was playing. This was the same lullaby he hummed to me at night to help me sleep. Instantly I hit rewind to listen to the song again from the start. Every cadence was the same. It couldn't…I mean…was this…was he the pianist on my I-pod? Was he the composer of this amazing music? He said that he played and music was clearly a very large part of his life, but could he really be behind these extraordinary compositions?

I decided that I would ask Edward as soon as I could. He was waiting for me in the waiting area. I had insisted on going in alone to take my treatments. He had protested at first but relented once I explained why. It made it easier if I could shut out the world around me, and focus internally. For that I needed no distractions. Edward constituted a distraction; therefore he was banned from my room.

The tender sonata was too soothing to not respond to and I found myself relaxing more than I thought possible as the gently melodies flowed through me. This was one surprise I was thankful for.

I was already nauseated by the time the nurse came to disconnect me from the IV and send me home. I walked slowly from my room to where I knew Edward was waiting. I kept swallowing against the need to be sick. As soon as Edward saw me he came to my side and helped me out to the car.

"Please drive slow. I'm afraid of what might happen if you drive too fast." I whispered shutting my eyes tight.

"Ok." He said simply.

I took a few deep breaths as he pulled out of the parking space bending down to place my face in my hands. I rocked slowly back and forth as I dug my fingers through my hair. I just had to make it until we got home. I could do this. Maybe I should have asked Edward to drive fast. It wasn't like I was looking out the window or anything.

As soon as I felt the car stop I bolted for the house. I didn't even bother closing the door behind me as I ran up the stairs to the bathroom. I had made it home just in time. I sat with my head still bent over the toilet as I reached up to the handle and flushed. I groaned softly and felt dizzy as a fresh wave of nausea hit me. This was not going to be a fun day.

I slid across the floor and leaned up against the shower. I had learned from past experience that it was futile to leave the bathroom when I was like this.

"Are you all right?" I heard Edward ask from the doorway.

I looked up at him and noticed how alarmed he looked. I hadn't even known he was there. "Yeah. I'm f-" I clapped my hand across my face as quickly as I could and grabbed for the toilet. "Fine." I finished lamely once I was done.

"Oh Bella." Edward leaned down and took me into his cold arms and cradled me into his chest. He sat with me for the next few hours holding my hair back as needed and placing his cool hands to the back of my neck. Normally I would be embarrassed to have him see me like this, anyone really, but I was too sick to care at this point.

I was starting to feel cold and tried to get up but I felt his arms tighten around me keeping me in place.

"What do you need?" He asked softly.

"I want to go to bed. I'm cold."

Without another word he got up with me in his arms and carried me to my room. Ever so gently he placed me in my bed and tucked the covers in around me.

"Do you need more blankets?"

"Please." I answered as I curled up into a fetal position. Before I could explain to him where to look he was gone. He returned with three blankets in his arms and threw them over me. He did not lay down with me, but stayed sitting propped against the side of my bed gently caressing my hair.

I must have looked a fright, but he said nothing. His eyes roamed over my face and were filled with nothing but love and admiration.

I was starting to warm up and relaxed a little under the covers. "Thank you for the music. It was incredible."

He smiled crookedly, and even though I felt terribly sick I could feel my heart rate pick up ever so slightly at the sight.

He grinned obviously hearing the change in my heart rate. "I'm glad you liked it."

"I recognized one of the songs. It's one that you often hum to me."

"Yes." He smiled running the back of his hand across my cheek ever so softly, back and forth unrelentingly. "That is one of my favorites."

"Where did you get it?"

He smiled. "I didn't get it anywhere."

My eyes widened. "So that was your music and your playing?"

He chuckled once nodding his head. He leaned in kissing me briefly on the tip of my nose. "I wrote that lullaby with you in mind." He whispered.

My eyes filled with tears. "It was so beautiful." I replied softly.

"_You_ are so beautiful." His eyes, now deep pools of liquid gold, held so much love for me it took my breath away.

It was quiet for a moment as I let it all sink in. I couldn't believe he had actually written me a song. "Thank you." I finally managed to whisper.

He smiled in response as he began to once again stroke my hair. "Why don't you try to sleep?"

"Can't." I was still feeling queasy though I no longer felt the need to sit by the toilet.

"Would you like me to read to you then?" He suggested.

I smiled. He was being so sweet, but I felt bad for making him do everything for me. "You don't have to. You've done enough."

"I've done nothing." He declared sternly. "What book would you like?"

I sighed, obviously he wasn't going to drop it. I thought for a moment about what book sounded good to me. I loved Jane Austen. I couldn't decide between _Mansfield Park,_ or _Pride and Prejudice_. They were both favorites of mine.

"You decide." I finally said. "Over there," I said pointing with my chin towards my desk "is a collection of books by Jane Austen. I love them all."

He got up and retrieved the book then took up his previous position on the floor. He eyed the book for a brief second then flipped to a page. "_Pride and Prejudice,_ it is." He announced before beginning to read.

I got lost in the cadences as Edward's velvety voice breathed new life to the words on the page. I found myself hanging on every word almost forgetting where I was. I closed my eyes and lay back on my pillows as Edward described a world much more simple than my own and drifted off to sleep.

"How is she doing?" I heard someone ask.

I was just starting to wake and I could hear talking near by. I opened my eyes and looked towards where the voices were coming from. In my doorway stood Edward and my father.

"She's been sleeping for a few hours now. It was rough when she first got home, but she seems to be doing better now." His voice sounded wary.

"Hey Dad." I replied sleepily, stretching my arms out from under the covers.

He smiled and came to my side. "Hey Bells. How ya doin' kid?"

"I'm ok. Are you home early?" I asked as I noticed it was still light out. Charlie usually didn't get home until after dark.

He smiled guiltily. "I wanted to make sure you were alright and didn't need anything."

"Dad, I'm fine. You didn't have to come home early. Edward's been with me. You should have just called." I said as I looked up at Edward still standing in the doorway grinning at me.

He nodded his head. "Have you had anything to eat? Can I get you some water maybe?"

I recoiled at the mere thought of food, but decided that fluids were a good idea. "Do we have any Gatorade?"

Charlie thought for a moment then frowned. "I don't think…"

"I'll get you some. Anything else you think you might want?" Edward called from the door way cutting Charlie off.

"You don't have to. I can drink water." I insisted.

"Don't be silly. What kind would you like?"

I shrugged. I hated the stuff truthfully, but whenever I was sick like this my body seemed to crave it. "The light blue kind if they have it I guess. Thanks."

"I'll be back as soon as I can. If you think of anything else you may like I have my cell on me. Can I get you anything Chief Swan?" He questioned politely.

"No-no Edward. Thanks. Call me Charlie. Let me walk you out."

I had a bad feeling about them being alone together and I looked reproachfully at my father.

He chuckled messing my hair. "Don't worry. I'll return him to you in one piece. I just want to ask him a few questions."

I frowned as I watched them leave my room together, but I was far too tired to protest. I lay my head back down and tucked myself back under the covers when I got an idea. I scanned my room quickly and found what I was looking for on my desk. Slowly I got up, staying a little hunched over for my stomach still ached, and retrieved my I-pod. I crawled back into bed content as I turned it on listening, once again, to Edward's sweet melodies.

"Hey."

My eyes flew open and I jumped. Edward was kneeling beside my bed. He had removed one of my earpieces and I could still feel his lips at my ear as he chuckled.

"I got your juice for you." He held a bottle up in one hand for me to see.

It took me a moment to calm down. I was half asleep when he arrived, completely wrapped up in his music to notice anyone come into my room.

I took a few deep breaths to calm down and took the bottle from him. "Thanks."

I took a few small sips afraid to upset my stomach and smiled. "So what did you and Charlie talk about?" I tried to sound casual, but even I could hear the burning curiosity in my voice.

He grinned. "Nothing too terrible. He was just being a protective father."

I furrowed my eyebrows together. "What did he say?" I demanded as I stifled a yawn.

He smiled reaching out and catching a stray piece of my hair in his hand and tucking it behind my ear. "He just wanted to know what my intentions were concerning you." He shrugged as if it were no big deal.

I blushed slightly. "What did you tell him?"

He smirked. "I told him that you are very special to me." He leaned down and kissed my forehead. "And I love you very much." His lips traveled down my check and to my jaw. "That I was here for the long haul, and would not be going anywhere." His lips were mere centimeters from mine at this point. I could actually taste his cool breath as my mouth started to water.

"Hmmm." I managed to say before his lips were on mine in a very sweet kiss.

"That must have made him happy." I managed to say as I gasped for air.

He shrugged as if making my father happy did not concern him. "It's the truth."

I stared into his eyes and could see nothing but love there and felt my throat tighten. "I love you so much." I managed to choke out.

He ducked his head and kissed me quickly on the lips. "I know." He smiled running a hand through my hair.

"Sleep. You look exhausted." He commanded.

I settled back into my bed feeling tired enough to sleep even though I had spent the better part of the day sleeping already. I closed my eyes and heard the familiar sound of Edward humming, what I knew now was, my lullaby.


	27. Chapter 27

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

It was a rough night. My nausea eventually caught up with me and I spent a good part of my evening curled up on the bathroom floor. Edward left around eight to allow me to rest, or so he told Charlie. He appeared in my room again as soon as he had returned his car. It had bothered him that he was not able to help me while I was sick because Charlie was still awake. Charlie had done his best to help me. He got me a blanket to keep me warm. Eventually I sent him to bed. Begrudgingly, he left me alone, leaving a glass of water beside me just in case and with the charge to wake him if I needed anything. I once again laid down flat against the floor enjoying the feel of the cold on my skin. I draped the blanket over me to keep the chill off.

I knew the instant Charlie was sleeping because Edward was at my side taking me in his arms.

"Do you want some of your juice?" He offered in a low voice so as to not wake my father up. "Maybe it will help if you have something on your stomach."

I shook my head and leaned further into his chest. I was just so tired and weak. I hated this feeling, but there was nothing I could do about it. I closed my eyes and tried to will my stomach to stop churning, bit the more I thought about it the more nauseas I felt. I was thankful for Edward's presence. I was too weak to hold myself to the toilet anymore. He seemed to sense when I was going to be sick and would help me lean forward then pull me back into his arms.

I could feel my hair sticking to my neck as I broke out in a cold sweat, and I shivered briefly feeling chilled. He reached down and wrapped me securely in the blanket Charlie had given me and began rubbing soothing circles into my back. I closed my eyes as I concentrated on his touch.

"Thank you." I whispered in the early hours of the morning. He had been so unbelievably good to me. He never wavered. No matter what, it never seemed to bother him. He only seemed concerned about my comfort and how I was doing.

"Shhh. Just rest." He admonished me gently.

I felt horrid. My stomach was starting to settle minutely and I could feel my eyelids getting heavier by the second. I faintly remember hearing Edward hum my lullaby before the world around me turned black.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

I opened my eyes to find my self in my bed again. Edward must have brought me to bed once I fell asleep. It was light outside it almost looked like midday. I looked around and found him sitting in my rocking chair reading. He looked so peaceful. I smiled as I watched him. Almost instantly he looked away from his book and at me.

He grinned. "You're awake." He put his book down and slowly came to my side. "How are you feeling?" I could hear the anxiety heavy in his voice.

"Tired." I admitted.

His eyes traced over my face for a minute. "You had a rough night."

I reached out from under the covers and touched his face with my hand. "Thank you." I muttered softly remembering all he had done for me.

He smiled slightly. "There's no need to thank me. I did nothing really." Before I could respond he added quickly. "Do you think you could drink something?"

I thought for a moment and realized that my stomach felt ok. At the mention of fluids I could feel how dry my mouth was and started to feel thirsty. "Yeah."

"I'll get your juice."

He left in a blink of an eye and returned quicker than what should be possible with a bottle of juice in his hand. I gingerly took a few swigs trying to be careful. I knew the worst was over, for now. I was just so very tired. I had a hard time keeping my eyes open. I felt guilty for monopolizing so much of Edward's time especially since I seemed to be unconscious for a large portion of it.

"Why don't you go home and see your family for a little while?" I suggested as I stifled a yawn.

He caressed my face with his long elegant fingers. "I'm not leaving your side."

I frowned as looked upon his face. His eyes were a dark gold and the circles under his eyes were turning deep purple once more.

"You look like you could use a break." I said eyeing him meaningfully.

He shook his head. "I'm perfectly fine."

"Edward, you have needs too. I'll just be sleeping most of the day. I'm too tired to do much else." I added in a sour tone. "Go, hunt. I'll be fine. Spend some time with your family. Please?"

"I'm not going anywhere." He muttered solemnly.

"Please? I feel bad for taking up so much of your time. I'm sure Emmett or Jasper would love to go with you. You could come back later tonight. Take your cell so that I can call you if I need anything. You can even ask Alice to check on me." I suggested shrewdly.

"You really want to get rid of me that bad?" He said trying to sound hurt, but I could clearly see the humor in his eyes.

"Please?"

He eyed me for a few minutes before taking his phone from his pocket. "Alice." I heard him say. I couldn't make out the rest of his conversation he was speaking too fast. Before long he shut his phone and sighed. "It's all set. Alice is going to check on you this afternoon. I'll leave her cell number with you so if you need anything you can call her. I won't be far. I'll be back before Charlie is home from work. Please take it easy. Do not under any circumstances hesitate to call me if you need something."

I smiled triumphantly. I couldn't hold the next yawn in and heard Edward laugh softly at me. "I'll stay until you fall asleep."

I closed my eyes and listened as Edward hummed my lullaby to me, relaxing to the sweet sound of his voice as sleep once again over took me.

I awoke hours latter feeling more rested but still tired. I looked around my room; despite knowing I would be alone and sighed finding no one there. I ran my hands through my hair and groaned. My hair was one big matted mess from the day before. Blushing I realized what a mess I must be. I decided it was time for a shower.

Slowly I got out of bed grabbing my bag of toiletries on my way and headed to the bathroom. I took one look at myself in the mirror and grimaced. I looked like hell. My skin was pasty and gray. I had deep dark circles under my eyes, which looked empty. My lips were puckered and very dry. My once beautiful hair was dull and matted.

I began brushing my hair trying to make some sense of the tangled mess on top of my head before I showered. It took longer than I thought it would to tame my think locks. My arms were tired as I reached in and turned the water on in the shower.

As soon as the water made contact with my body I relaxed. The sound of the water and the feel of it hitting my skin was heavenly. I leaned forward against the palms of my hands and allowed the water to simply run over me for a long time. Eventually I straightened up and began washing my hair. I was utterly exhausted by the time I finished grabbing my towel and wrapping it around me.

I trotted slowly to my room and collapsed on my bed not caring that I was still wet. My eyes were extremely heavy and I found I could no longer keep them open as I felt myself drift off to sleep.

"Bella." I felt someone shaking me. "Bella you need to wake up you're freezing."

I furrowed my brows fighting to stay asleep.

"Come on. You're going to get sick if you stay like this." I heard her say in a desperate tone. "Edward's going to kill me." I heard her say in a much quieter voice.

I opened my eyes and saw Alice standing over me looking relieved to finally see me awake.

She put her hands on her hips and smield. "Well it's about time. You need to get dressed."

I shivered involuntarily for the first time realizing how cold I felt. I wrapped my arms around me legs and held them close to my body.

"Come on. I'll help you."

She reached down and grabbed my hand as she pulled me to my feet. She turned around and handed me a very soft and warm looking maroon sweat suit. She handed me then danced back over to my bed where she went to work removing my old sheets. I got dressed as fast as I could. She was down with my bed before me and I was surprised to find all new blankets on it.

"Where did these come from?" I asked gesturing towards the new blankets on my bed.

She smiled pulling me back to my bed. "I thought you might like them. Their down and will keep you very warm."

I was speechless. I didn't understand why she was being so nice to me. "You didn't have to…"

"Oh stop, now turn around so I can brush your hair out."

I did as I was told. She was very gentle and before I knew it she was done.

"There." She announced with a smile. "Now get back in bed."

I did as I was told without complaint. Within minutes I could feel the warmth from the blankets warm me through to the bone. It was unlike anything I had ever felt before.

"I'll be right back."

I watched as she left my room and returned moments later with a bowl in her hands.

"I got you some chicken noodle soup. It should be easy on your stomach."

I sat up taking the bowl from her hands. She took a seat at the end of my bed watching me as I sipped at the soup. I had to admit it didn't taste half bad. I couldn't understand why she was doing all this for me. She didn't even really know me, and yet here she was taking care of me.

"Why are you doing this?" I finally asked unable to keep quiet any longer.

She smiled warmly taking the bowl from me and setting it on the floor. She reached forward touching my cheek briefly with her fingers. "Edward's been alone for so long, and now he has you. You mean more to him than you realize. He's changed so much since he's met you." She mused pausing briefly. "You are everything to my brother, and therefore mean a lot to our family. We're so thankful for all that you've done for him—for the happiness you've brought him."

I was caught off guard by her response and fell quiet as I stared into her golden eyes. I could find only truth there and was touched by her words.

"Now." She said after a few minutes of silence. "You should rest. Edward will be back in a few hours. If he finds out that I kept you awake talking when you should have been resting…well let's just say he will not be very pleased."

I smiled knowing exactly how Edward would be. "Thanks Alice." I said softly as I buried myself into my blankets and closed my eyes.

"Sleep well Bella." I heard her call as she took my bowl and left my room.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

I woke for the third time that day to find the sun starting to set. I looked around and smiled hugely finding Edward staring at me from the foot of my bed.

"Edward." I whispered as he came to my side stroking my hair with one of his hands. "When did you get back?" I asked examining his eyes to make sure he had fed. I was pleased to find them back to the bright gold color I loved.

"A little while ago. Did Alice take good care of you in my absence?"

"Yes, she did. Will you thank her for me when you see her again for all that she's done for me?"

He grinned nodding his head. "Of course."

"Would you like something to eat?"

"Is there anymore of the soup left from this afternoon?" I was afraid to eat anything else.

"I believe so. I'll be right back." He returned with a bowl in his hands with steam coming from it.

I took the bowl from him and gestured for him to join me on the bed. He sat down next to me gingerly and watched as I sipped at the soup.

Once I was done he took my bowl from me setting it on my desk. "Do you think you could sleep more?"

I shook my head. "I'm tired, but I can't sleep."

He came and lay down next to me holding me in his arms. "Will you promise me something?"

"Anything." I answered automatically.

"Could you maybe save big activities, such as showering, for when someone is around to help you?"

I frowned. "I don't need help with that." I wondered what Alice had told him.

"Please?" He asked his lips just above me ear. "I don't want you getting sick because you were too tired to get dressed to only find you passed out and shivering on your bed."

I scowled at my door. "It wasn't that bad."

"Please, Bella?" He pleaded one last time.

I sighed. "Fine." I grumbled.

I could feel him smile against my head. "Thank you."

It was silent for a few moments before he spoke again. "If you can't sleep what would you like to do?"

I thought for a moment then shrugged turning to face him. "We could just talk."

He smiled in agreement.

For the next few hours we talked about everything and anything. I learned more about his family and how they were very close. I was finally able to learn more about the one Cullen I had never met, Rosalie. I had always wondered about her. She was the only one who did not approve of me, but Edward told me not to worry she would come around eventually. I doubted him, but did not press the issue.

We shared our happiest moments with each other as well as our saddest. I was surprised to learn that both those moments for him involved me.

"If you could change one thing about your life what would it be?" I asked one time.

He thought for a moment. "I would not be a vampire. I would be human so that I could be with you without endangering your life every second we are together."

I reached out and cupped his face in my hands. "You don't endanger me. I've never felt safer than I do when I am in your arms."

He eyes tightened slightly as he stared at me. I could see the doubt in his eyes, but I spoke the truth.

"Alright, if you could change one thing about your life what would it be?" He countered.

I contemplated my answer for a few seconds before answering. "I would wish for more time so that I would have more with you."

He stared at me incredulously. "You wouldn't wish to not be sick?" He sounded confused.

"No." I answered honestly.

"Why not?" He demanded.

I shrugged as if it were obvious. "Then I never would have moved here and met you."

He blinked a few times as if in shock then shook his head. "You love me more than I deserve."

I smiled. "I think you have that backwards."

He said nothing as he leaned down kissing me gently on the lips. I wrapped my arms around his neck trying to make the kiss last longer. I felt him smile against my mouth as he pulled away. I was unable to keep the disappointment off my face.

He grinned at me. "Charlie will be home soon."

I nodded knowing what that meant. I watched as he got up and took up his position in my rocking chair. Without a word he reached over and grabbed, _Pride and Prejudice,_ and began reading to me.

I closed my eyes as I listened to his voice, not bothering to listen to the words, and sighed contently.


	28. Chapter 28

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

The next few weeks dragged by. Each day seemed worse than the first. Edward was true to his word and was with me every step of the way. He was there for every tear and never once shied away from helping me no matter how sick I got or how much pain I was in.

Occasionally, Alice would stop by to talk and check up on me. One time Emmett even came with flowers to help cheer me up after a particularly rough session. It was very sweet. I was thankful for all their love and support, but was understandably anxious when my two weeks were up.

I was beyond nervous as Edward drove me to the doctors. This was it. I was finally going to find out if the treatments were actually working or not. Part of me hoped I had not suffered in vain, while another part of me prepared for the worse, more realistic option, that they had not worked.

As we pulled into the parking lot I began biting at my thumbnail nervously. Edward came to my side of the car to help me out, but instead leaned down taking my hand from my mouth.

"I have a good feeling about this. It's going to be good news."

I smiled reaching out to stroke his cheek. "We'll see in a few minutes right?"

He grinned. "Come on. We don't want to be late."

I allowed him to pull me from the car and walk me to my doctor's office. Even though I knew he would hear everything that was said in the office, I still wanted to go in alone and asked him to wait outside for me. He complied without complaint.

I took a deep breath and entered the office taking my usual seat on the other side of his desk. Dr. Spencer joined me soon after, his nose buried in a folder. I took a deep breath. This was it, the moment of truth.

"Miss Swan. How are you feeling today?"

"Nervous." I answered honestly.

He nodded his head but did not look happy. By the look on his face I knew what he was going to tell me before the words left his mouth.

"I'm sorry to tell you, but your body does not seem to have reacted to the treatments."

I swallowed hard nodding my head. I didn't feel bad so much for myself but for Edward. I was too shocked to feel anything for myself at the moment. Edward had been so hopeful and optimistic. This news was going to really upset him.

"It's only been a few weeks. I would like to keep trying."

"Will it really help?" I asked softly.

He pursed his lips. "I couldn't say for sure, there's just no guarantee. I still think it's your best chance."

I nodded looking down at my hands. "Thank you doctor for all you've done. But I think I would rather enjoy the time I have left if it's all the same to you."

He was quiet for a brief moment. "I understand."

I looked up at him and smiled as best I could. "Well if that's everything I guess I will be going."

He got up and walked me to the door placing a hand on my shoulder. "I'll see you next month for our usual appointment?"

"I'll be there." I promised as I walked out of the room.

I found Edward with his head in his hands in one of the chairs in the waiting room. I walked slowly to his side sitting next to him. I placed one hand on his back and rubbed small circles.

"You heard." I stated more than asked.

He didn't reply he simply reached out and took me into his arms holding me tight against him. I could feel tears form in my eyes as I embraced him back, my own disappointment catching up to me. All that pain, all that time for nothing! I began to sob into his chest and his arms held me tighter as my body shook. I never should have agreed. I got everyone's hopes up for nothing! Nothing! I never realized until this very moment that I myself had actually been hopeful. Subconsciously, I had actually anticipated that this time would be different, that this time I would be able to fight back and be healed. I had been a fool to believe—a fool to hope. I knew better.

After a while I had quieted down. Edward pulled me from him and smiled, but it did not reach his eyes.

"Come on let's get out of here."

I nodded getting up and walking with him to his car. I thought he was taking me home and was surprised when I found myself in front of his house. I really wasn't in the mood to face anyone and groaned.

Sensing my discomfort Edward took my hand in his and gave it a gently squeeze. "Only Alice and Esme are home, and you don't have to tell them anything. We can just go up to my room and be alone."

"Thanks." I mumbled.

Together we walked to his room not once running into a member of his family, for which I was thankful. He lay down on his big leather couch pulling me down on top of him as he turned on his stereo using the remote.

He held me close and rubbed my back for a long time before he finally broke the silence that had fallen over us.

"So." He stated softly.

"So." I echoed.

"The doctor wants to keep trying."

I shrugged. "It doesn't matter. It won't work. It's not worth it."

He pulled back from me and sat up with me in his lap. "What are you saying?" He demanded.

I looked at him confused. "I'm stopping treatments. I thought you knew that? Didn't you hear me tell the doctor?"

"Why?" He asked sounding desperate.

I stared at him incredulously. "Why? Edward, were your eyes closed these last few weeks? Did you suddenly forget how sick I have been?"

He eyes tightened and he clenched his jaw. "No, I remember. This is not what we agreed to."

"What do you mean, this is not what we agreed to?" I pulled out of his grasp and stared at him expectantly.

"You agreed to under go any and all treatments your doctor suggested."

"And I did just that." I snapped.

"Not if you're refusing treatment now." He replied instantly.

I got up from his lap and stood in front of him fuming. "Are you backing out? After all I went through—is that what you're saying?" My voice was hard and angry.

"That's up to you. You know my conditions."

I clenched my jaw as I fought back the tears that were forming in my eyes. I was so angry with him right now, but above all else I was hurt. Hurt that he would do this to me.

I turned my back to him refusing to let him see the pain on my face. I wrapped my arms around my torso and began walking towards the door.

I heard him sigh behind me. "Bella, wait." He placed his hand on my shoulder and I instantly shook it off.

"Don't." I said through clenched teeth. "You're right." I whispered as the tears I had been fighting began to fall. "I am stopping treatments. Against my better judgment I allowed my doctor to use me as his personal guinea pig. For two weeks I have been beyond miserable, unable to eat or really function on any level normally. But still I endured, and even allowed myself to become hopeful, like a fool. We made a deal after all and I gave you my word. I did my time with no complaints and with no results." I spun around then to look at him my voice full of venom. "So excuse me for not wanting to expose myself to that torture for nothing again. Oh wait, not for nothing—no—it did give you peace of mind after all and a sense of false hope. Surely that was worth all my suffering."

He said nothing as I finished. He simply stood wide-eyed and frozen in front of me. I turned on my heel and left his room without another word. I found Alice downstairs. She took one look at me and instantly came to my side.

"Will you take me home please? I need to be alone right now."

"Of course. Let's go."

We didn't talk on the drive to my house though I caught her throwing curious glances my way every so often. I thanked her for the ride and managed to make it to my room before breaking down.

I was exhausted emotionally and physically. I didn't think I could take much more. How could he do this to me? How could he expect me to continue with treatments after watching me go through them with no results? I saw the pain reflected in his eyes as he watched me suffer. Why would be want to see me go through that again? Was he that delusional? Was I being irrational?

I cried myself to sleep that night feeling guilty for the sharp words I had spoken to him. He had stayed away. For the first time in a long time I fell asleep alone, feeling lonelier than I ever thought I could.


	29. New Ending

All characters belong to Stephenie Meyer

Author's note--- This is a new ending. I forgot to write a chapter and so I included it here. I hope you all enjoy. There will be no sequel.

I woke the next morning, my eyes feeling incredibly dry and my head aching. I didn't want to get up. I wanted to pretend yesterday never happened. Fresh tears filled my eyes as I went over the events from the previous day in my head. The doctor giving me the bad news, Edward's reaction, my harsh words…

I shook my head angrily back and forth to dispel the images and flung my blankets off of me. I sat up quickly and gasped. There sitting in my rocking chair was Edward. I rapidly blinked back my tears as we stared at one another saying nothing. I had no idea how long he had been in my room. Maybe I hadn't been alone last night.

I thought I would feel anger, but I didn't—I couldn't. I felt hurt, betrayal, guilt, and abandoned—but couldn't make myself feel angry with him. Looking into his eyes it was almost like looking into a mirror. Though he kept his face smooth and calm his eyes betrayed him. I could see his pain, and guilt within.

"How long have you been here?" I finally asked unable to take the silence a minute longer.

Up until that moment he had been like a statue unmoving. At my words he seemed to relax minutely. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "Most of the night."

"Why are you here now?"

I saw a flicker of an emotion cross his face. I thought it might be hurt but I wasn't sure, he recovered too quickly to tell. "I can leave if you wish."

He made to get up from the rocking chair and my heart ached at the thought of him leaving. "No. That's not what I meant."

He sat back down seeming relieved. "It's just you stayed away all day yesterday. I didn't think…I mean…you were so…and then what I said…" I trailed off looking down at my hands as I fidgeted.

He was at my side in a flash taking my hands in his. "You said no more than I deserved."

I looked up at him misty eyed as I awaited his explanation. He smiled sadly reaching up and wiping the tears from my eyes.

"Oh my sweet, sweet Bella. I'm so sorry for what happened yesterday. My actions were inexcusable. I was convinced these treatments were the answer. With more time I knew they would work, they had to work. I couldn't lose you like that. I was infuriated when you refused to continue. I thought you were giving up, admitting defeat, wanting to die. I had convinced myself so thoroughly that I could not see the plain truth in front of my face. Not that any of this is an excuse for what I put you through."

"Edward it's…" I began to say but he cut me off.

"You spoke nothing more than the truth to me yesterday. You were right, the treatments served one purpose and one purpose only-to give _me_ what I wanted--hope." His voice was full of disgust. "I refused to accept that your life was over. You are so young, beautiful, and perfect in every way. You deserve so much more—certainly better than what I can give you."

He hesitated before he continued. "I would not blame you if you never wanted to see me again." His voice broke as he uttered his last sentence in a low hoarse voice.

"Edward." I said softly. He looked up at me with such sadness in his eyes it broke my heart. "I love you. I never want to be without you."

He smiled faintly at my words but his eyes remained pained. "I'm sorry for what I said last night." He opened his mouth to interrupt me but I covered it with my hand to stop him. "I know you think you deserved it, but I was harsher than I should have been. I was so angry and hurt, but that's no excuse. When you stayed away I thought…well I wasn't sure if you would ever come back."

He removed my hand from his mouth and placed it to his cheek. "I will always be here with you—only if you wished me away would I leave." He promised earnestly.

I stroked his cheek with my thumb. "So where does this leave us?" I mused out loud.

"That depends on you."

"Me?" I asked puzzled.

"You do not wish to continue with treatments correct?"

My face fell. Was he still hopeful after everything that I would continue? "Edward, I can't." I replied desperately.

"I'm not asking you to."

My mind was spinning. He wasn't making sense. "What are you asking then?"

"For time."

I furrowed my brow. "I don't understand."

He reached out burying his hand in my hair. "We had an agreement, and I made you a promise." He hesitated then sighed. "You upheld your end of the bargain, so I will uphold mine." I could tell his last words cost him a great deal to say, but I couldn't stop the smile that crossed my face. "I am simply asking for time. I want you to be able to enjoy being human and have every human experience you possibly can before I change you."

"I don't have much time." I countered.

He sighed deep and low. "I know." He whispered unable to mask the pain in his voice. "But I want you to enjoy what time you have left. Please, Bella? I promise to change you, just be patient. Enjoy being human just a little longer. You don't get another chance at being human."

I took a deep breath considering his plea. I guess it didn't really matter when as long as he did change me. It would be nice to have a little more time to say my goodbyes before I left my family forever. "Ok." I agreed softly.

He smiled crookedly and for the first time that morning it reached his eyes. He leaned up and kissed me long and hard. This kiss was filled with so much passion it left me yearning for more. My lips worked perfectly against his. I wrapped my arms tightly around his neck and as he pulled me tight against his body.

When we finally broke apart I found myself gasping for air. He chuckled cradling my head into his chest. "I love you Isabella Swan."

"I know." I breathed in between gasps for air. I felt him shake with laughter around me.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

"Alice what's going on?" I whined for the hundredth.

"Nothing Bella." Her eyes were a little too innocent for my liking.

I glared at her as she pulled me into the salon. "I am simply pampering a close friend of mine. Is that a crime?" She giggled.

I sighed rolling my eyes at her. I had been extremely busy for over a month now. I had made arrangements with the school to graduate early. Which sounded good when I initially started, but I was beginning to regret my decision. Every spare moment I had was devoted to studying. I was taking a double class load and it was just about killing me. I had no time for anything anymore. Luckily, for me, Edward was tutoring me.

Alice had surprised me today, waking me up by bouncing excitedly on my bed. She decided that I needed a day out, just us girls. I had been working too hard and needed to take a well-deserved break.

I tried to fight her but I was starting to discover that it's virtually impossible to deny Alice anything. Edward had been little help. He had all but pushed me out the door. So here I sat in one of those swivel chairs getting a pedicure and manicure.

"Can't you at least read to me while I sit here?" I asked. I had insisted on taking some textbooks with me to study during the drive to and from Port Angeles.

"Bella." Alice whined. "You are not going to fail by simply taking one day off to relax and have fun. No books." She insisted taking a seat next to me as she too got her nails done.

I sighed resigned. There was just no arguing with her when she set her mind to something.

"What color would you like?" The manicurists asked.

"Uh…" I started looked at the large basket of nail polish she placed in front of me trying to decide on a semi-moderate color.

"She'll take this one." Alice called reaching out and placing a very dark shimmering red nail polish in the manicurists' hand.

"Wait. No."

"Trust me Bella. It will look fabulous." She smiled.

The manicurists looked at me expectantly raising an eyebrow at me. "Yeah, ok." I agreed somewhat unwillingly. I turned to see Alice beaming and rolled my eyes at her.

Once our nails were done Alice insisted we get our hair done. I actually felt myself relax as my hair was being shampooed and my head massaged. I wasn't sure what orders the stylists had been given but soon my hair was being curled, teased and pinned, in the most elegant style I had ever seen.

I leaned closer to the mirror to admire her work. My hair had been pulled away from my face on the sides and pinned straight back, while the hair at the crown had been gently teased to give my hair more volume as it cascaded down my back. What were most surprising were the clips holding my sides back. They were, for lack of a better word, extraordinary. They were lined with hundreds of crystals that glittered and sparkled as the light reflected off them.

"It's called a feminine faux hawk." The stylist commented as she watched me admire her work in the mirror.

"Where did you get these clips?" I asked gently touching one in my hair.

"You're friend." She answered simply.

I turned to find Alice beaming at me. She looked amazing. Her hair had been flattened and styled elegantly around her face.

"Where did you get these hair clips?" I asked.

She shrugged walking towards the register to pay. "Just something I had lying around at home."

"They're beautiful. Thank you."

She smiled as she finished paying and we exited the store. I was relieved when she didn't insist upon going shopping, instead leading me back to the car.

"Are we going home?" I asked hopefully. It was already past four and I wanted to get some studying in while it was still light out.

She grinned knowingly. "Yes, but you're not studying. There's still too much to do."

I eyed her shrewdly as we left town. Something was definitely up. "Alice Cullen, tell me what is going on right now." I demanded, in what I thought was a firm voice, crossing my arms across my chest.

She grinned shaking her head.

I huffed annoyed.

She sighed. "Just relax Bella. I promise no one is going to hurt you. Enjoy yourself for once."

I turned my head to look out my side window. "Easy for you to say." I mumbled. "You're not the one being forced to do things against her will."

I heard her shrill angelic laughter from beside me as we whizzed down the road too fast. I grabbed one of my schoolbooks and started reading to pass the time.

All too soon we pulled up to the large white house and I felt my spirits lift at the prospect of seeing Edward. I hadn't seen him in hours, something I was not used to. He almost never left my side these days, not that I minded.

I looked towards the house expectantly as I climbed out.

"He's not here." Alice said as she opened the front door. I felt my face fall at her words.

"Where is he?" I demanded.

"Out. He'll be back soon."

Alice forced me upstairs and into her room, which had transformed into a min-salon of sorts. I looked at all the make up and visibly flinched. I did not enjoy putting on a lot of make up. It always left me feeling heavy, and fake somehow. I was a simple person.

"Sit." She ordered as she danced into her closet.

I debated refusing her, but decided she would just pick me up and force me into the chair if I did so I complied.

She began busying herself as she applied a thin layer of eyeliner to each eye, and then moved onto my lashes. She stepped back raising her hand to her lips thoughtfully before she grabbed a dark lip-gloss and applied it to my full lips.

"There. Not too much, but just enough." She concluded happily. "Now to get you dressed."

"Dressed?"

"You can't wear that." She said pointing to my usual outfit of jeans and a t-shirt in disgust.

"Why? Where am I going?" I asked nonchalantly as I tried to catch her off guard.

She smirked. "Nice try. Now come on."

She lead me into the bathroom and closed the door behind me. "Wear what is hanging up behind the door. Call if you need any help." She added as she danced excitedly from the room giving me privacy.

I found a black dress bag hanging from a hook. Hesitantly, I reached out and unzipped the bag, gasping once I realized what was inside. The dress I had admired while shopping with Alice all those weeks ago hung beautifully before me. I reached out and once again took in the silkiness of the fabric. I was shocked. I remembered this dress costing a fortune. There was no way I could accept such a gift.

"Alice, I can't. This is…"

"Don't even try to get out of this. Put the dress on, or I will call Jasper in here to help me hold you down as I force you into it." She commanded.

There was something undeniable about her tone and I blushed as I took the dress of the hook. There was no way I was going to allow Jasper to see me in less than Edward had.

I was surprised how well the dress fit. Aside from being a little too long it seemed to hug every curve perfectly, even the curves I never knew I had.

Shyly, I opened the door to her room.

"I knew it would fit perfectly."

"It's a little long." I lifted the dress up as I walked into the center of her room. The last thing I wanted to do was trip in this dress.

"Not with these." Alice beamed as she held up a silver pair of stiletto shoes.

"No way." I said backing away. "I'll kill myself if I wear those."

"Stop being so dramatic. They're perfect." She said as she advanced on me. I thought about running but knew I wouldn't get far.

I sighed defeated as I stood before her, now a few inches taller. She smiled brightly obviously pleased with how I had turned out.

Without another word she lifted me into her arms and flew with me down the stairs. I started to protest but she was sitting me down in front of the living room couch before I could get anything out. She fixed my hair in a few placed and then nodded in approval.

"The door will be for you." She commanded with a smirk as she raced back up to her room.

"Alice." I whined. "What's going on?" I finished flustered, finding myself alone for the first time today.

I jumped as I heard the doorbell ring and slowly I made my way to the door, careful not to trip in my new shoes.

My eyes widened as I took in who stood before me. Never had I seen a sight more beautiful in all my life. I felt as though I were dreaming. I blinked a few times as I tried to take it all in. Edward stood in front of me dressed in a black tuxedo holding one solitary red rose. He looked just as shocked as I did. I felt his eyes rake over me hungrily, and I blushed furiously.

"Wow." He breathed still frozen in place.

After a long moment he stepped forward. "You are absurdly beautiful." The sincerity of his words only proved to deepen my blush.

"I could say the same for you." Never before had I seen Edward wear black, and I could see why. It contrasted brilliantly with his hair and skin, enhancing his already unnatural beauty.

"Are you ready?" He asked handing me the rose.

"And where is it we're going?"

He grinned. "You'll see. Come on, or else we'll be late."

He offered me his arm and sighing I took it. "Have I told you lately how much I despise surprises?" I asked as I keep my feet in the ground in front of me determined not to trip.

He laughed heartily beside me as he led me to his car. I was too preoccupied with my feet to notice what I was getting into until Edward closed the door behind me.

It was not in his Volvo.

"Where'd you get this car?" I asked as he got in.

"This is my special occasions car." He answered brightly.

"Special occasions?"

He smiled taking my hand in his and bringing it to his lips. "You'll see."

I pursed my lips, taking my hand from him and crossing my arms across my chest to demonstrate my annoyance at being kept in the dark.

I heard him chuckle beside me as we made our way down the windy driveway. I still didn't have a clue as to where he might be taking me, especially dressed the way we were.

As he started to slow I finally took in my surroundings. We were in Port Angels, but why? Port Angels was a tourist town, nothing more. What could we possible be doing here that would require eveningwear?

I watched curiously as Edward parked in front of a small, but very nice hotel. I furrowed my brow as he got out and came to my side of the car and offered me his hand.

Grudgingly, I placed my hand in his and stood beside him. I allowed him to lead me into the hotel only to be met with curious stares. I shied away from them, leaning more heavily into Edward's side, feeling self-conscious.

We finally stopped in front of a large set of doors. Edward turned to me, his eyes a glow with excitement.

"Close your eyes."

I sighed, but complied. We walked a few feet more before we stopped. I opened my mouth to ask what was going on when I felt his lips at me ear.

"Open your eyes Bella."

Slowly I opened my eyes and inhaled sharply. We were in a beautifully decorated ballroom. Everything was decorated in burgundy's and rich gold's. There were wine-red accent lights positioned against the walls making the room look very seductive and romantic. Two small tables were placed towards the edge adorned in think golden tablecloths, the chairs clothed in deep red fabric tied off with a gold sash. In the middles was a wooden dance floor. Red lights shown down on the dance floor in the middle making it look mysterious. Chandeliers adorned the ceiling shining softly, accenting with just the right amount of light, as to keep things from being too dark.

In the corner I noticed Edward's entire family standing smiling brightly. I turned to look up at Edward with a confused expression on my face. He smiled leaning down and placing a soft kiss to my forehead.

"I wanted to do something special for you. You've been working so hard lately, and I know you're going to miss your prom." He said with just a hint of sadness in his voice. I smiled and gently stroked his cheek. We both knew I was going to be far too sick to go to prom once it came around. "I wanted you to have your moment. I didn't want you to miss anything."

I felt my eyes fill with tears. He had done all this for me. I didn't know what I had done to deserve him, but I was so thankful he was in my life. We stared at one another for a long time before we heard someone clear their throats. Blushing, I looked over at his family to find Emmett grinning wickedly.

"Well if you two are done over there, let's get this party started." He boomed.

I looked down feeling embarrassed as I heard Edward laugh beside me. Out of nowhere I heard music start playing and Edward pull me towards the dance floor. I instantly stiffened. I was grateful for all he had done, but there was no way I was going to dance. I was far too clumsy and didn't even know how.

Edward turned to me cocking his head to the side inquisitively. "What's wrong?" He asked.

"I don't dance." I said in a low voice.

"Why?"

I sighed feeling embarrassed. "In case you haven't noticed I seem to have two left feet." I snapped a little more sharply than I intended.

He got a knowing look in his eyes and grinned. "It's all in the leading."

He started to pull me towards the dance floor again but I dug my feet in refusing to move. I could see his family twirling brilliantly around the room. There was no way I would ever be able to compare to them. Knowing my luck I would somehow trip him sending us both barreling into the floor.

Feeling my resistance, he turned around and sighed. He eyed me shrewdly before walking towards me with a mischievous glint to his eyes. I started to back away and soon found myself trapped between the wall and Edward with no escape.

"I can see I'm going to need to convince you." He placed his hands on either side of my head smirking. I swallowed hard never taking my eyes off him.

He leaned down and ran his lips along my jaw back and forth causing me to shiver.

"Bella." I felt his cool breath play across my cheek. "Won't you dance with me, just once?"

I shook my head back and forth. He began kissing his way down my neck ever so slowly. I could feel my breathing start to increase as his kisses went lower and lower.

"Please? I promise I won't let anything happen to you."

I gasped as I felt his tongue ice-cold trace lightly across my collarbone. What was he doing to me? My whole body started to heat up as his tongue left my skin a flame in its wake.

"Don't you trust me, Bella?" His lips were back at me ear.

"Yes." I choked out in a very shaky voice.

He pulled back smiling hugely at me. "Dance with me. If you don't like it I promise never to ask you again."

I could tell by the look in his eyes that he knew that he had won. I sighed. "Cheater." I mumbled as he again grabbed my hand and pulled me to the dance floor.

I caught sight of Alice during a turn and she gave me an encouraging smile. Edward positioned my hands around his neck and I could feel my anxieties rising.

"Edward." I whispered hoarsely staring at him with anxious eyes. "I really can't dance."

He smiled. "I told you. It's all in the leading." And with that he lifted me up placing my feet on his and began to expertly spin me around the room. Before I knew it I found myself smiling, actually enjoying myself.

We danced the night away in each other's arms. It was an absolutely magical night, one that I would not soon forget. I fell asleep that night with a huge smile on my face for all Edward had done for me.

"I love you." I barely whispered as I felt sleep claim me.

"I love you too." I heard him faintly whisper as I drifted off to sleep.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

I had my own little cheering section come graduation day. Edward and his family sat next to my father in the front cheering me on. I worked harder than I ever had in my entire life, and was now graduating a year early. Of course Edward was there every step of the way. He was the best tutor I could have ever asked for.

My last few months had been heaven on earth. Edward took every opportunity he could to show me new things, allowing me to experience life as much as possible. He was always careful to not over due it, for fear I would get sick.

I was in almost constant pain now. I was on bed rest and on morphine drip. I had but weeks left. Edward never left my side, not even at night for appearances. Charlie never complained. It's not like anything could have happened.

Carlisle took over my care. He visited me every day to check up on me, and to see how I was doing, making any needed adjustments to my medications.

The time had come.

The plan was flawless really. I would go into cardiac arrest; Carlisle would administer to me and pronounce me dead. Edward would then come and take me away where Alice would be waiting with a car. They had a location already picked out where I would change far away from everything and everyone. All we needed was to pick a day.

It was Friday and Charlie had taken the day off. He had done that a lot lately, taking three-day weekends to be with me as much as possible. I needed to say goodbye.

We were playing a game of cards when I stopped to look up at him. I was thankful that I had decided to come live with him. He really was a great father. I was glad for the opportunity I had to get to know him better. I had asked Edward to leave for a while so that I could talk to him one last time alone.

"Dad?"

"Yeah honey?"

"I'm glad I came to live with you these last few months."

He smiled. "Me too. It's been nice having you around."

"I love you daddy."

"I love you too Bells."

"I always will. You know that right? No matter what."

He swallowed hard. "Enough of that." He replied gruffly. "This is not goodbye."

I looked at him sadly knowing how wrong he was. I could see his eyes getting misty as he reached up and roughly wiped at the moisture.

"Now are we going to play cards or what?" He almost growled.

I smiled. "Yeah dad, let's play." I answered.

I gave him a hug that night using all the strength I had left, knowing this would be the last time I saw him. I told him again how much I loved him and he smiled saying that he loved me too.

The plan went off without a hitch. Alice and Edward took me to a small cabin hours away. I was pumped full of morphine to keep me as comfortable as possible as we traveled.

Edward laid me gently on a bed they had prepared for me and smiled.

"Are you ready?"

I swallowed. "Yes." I whispered.

"I love you." I told him as I looked into his anxious eyes. "I trust you."

He leaned down and I felt his mouth at my ear. "I will never leave your side. I love you Bella."

I ran my fingers through his hair as he positioned himself at my neck. This was it--the beginning of my forever.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

THE END!!!!! Sorry there will be no Sequel. I forgot to write this scene earlier…so I decided to just fix the ending to include it. I hope you all liked it.

Yes, Edward bites her. I tried to leave that part up to the reader, though it is heavily implied. But many have asked soooooo…yes he does indeed fulfill his end of the agreement.


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